Fug File: Fug or Fab

Fug or Fab: Gwyneth Paltrow

I feel like she’s really into this silhouette right now, for some inexplicable reason:


The Inaugural Hong Kong amfAR Charity Party

I hope she covers this burning question in this week’s upcoming GOOP. Perhaps an appealing slice of side-torso has secret health benefits, like, it actually airs your spleen in a literal rather than metaphorical way. I don’t know. But I DO know that her dress has what appears to be giant boils on it, and I’m not entirely sure that I can endorse something that forced me to look up the correct spelling of “buboes.”

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]


Fugs or Fabs: Lily James in Dior

Bless this child for shouldering the Cinderella promotional load so heartily. Has Helena Bonham Carter even left the house? Of course, if she had, she probably wouldn’t approve of this:

lily james toronto cinderella

I want to praise Lily James to the high heavens for not wearing white or beige shoes with this. But it’s awfully plain, no? I think it’s supposed to feel very sophisticated with all those little buttons and the random satin arms, but instead it feels a little like a nightie someone sent to Natalie Portman. Helana Bonham-Carter would not be satisfied until this was accessorized with a petticoat and some plaid scarves and then a few twigs poking out of Lily’s head. Part of me wants her to sweep in like the fairy godmother she ACTUALLY is, just to see how it might go.

This Dior went markedly better:

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Fug or Fab: Charlize Theron

Real talk: I find it hard to be objective here because I find her man-accessory to be highly unpleasant:

Premiere Of Open Road Films' "The Gunman" - Arrivals

But regardless, I think it’s possible that she’s wearing lingerie to this event. REALLY NICE lingerie, the kind you take out of your drawer and say, “I wish I could wear this in public. Maybe….? No.” But lingerie never the less. What are your thoughts, Fug Nation?


Unfug or Fab: Camilla Belle in Preen

This very nearly arrested me at first. It’s bold and bright and interesting to behold:

camilla belle moet & chandon roger federer event

But then my crankypants came out of the dryer, and suddenly, it looked like when you belt your bathrobe in haste and it randomly becomes two different lengths. And then the blousy sleeves suddenly seemed like the jacket on an ’80s tracksuit. Maybe something, say, Morgan Fairchild was wearing on an episode of Paper Dolls, perhaps while throwing paint on someone’s fashion line, screaming wildly while her bangs did not even move in the rage-breeze. And once I got to THAT iconic blonde place, Camilla here was never going to survive the competition.

In other words, my thought descended into madness.

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Mostly Well Played: Chloe Sevigny in Louis Vuitton

Excusing for a second the fact that her head clearly just woke up from a long hard nap:

chloe sevigny NYC premiere bloodline

This totally works for me on The Sev. The boots have an appropriately retro feel for her whole aesthetic. And while that cockamamie pattern resembles flamingoes hopped up on goofballs, fighting to the death and regurgitating body parts onto the skirt, somehow that suits her. Which does NOT sound like a compliment, but somehow it is one.

[Photo: Getty]


Fug or Fab the Ad: Kristen Stewart for Chanel

Here’s the thing:


I don’t know if Kristen Stewart is the first actress who pops into mind when I think “sexy French business lady.” However, she might be SELLING ME “sexy French business lady” here. Because when I saw this photo, I did not think, “why is K Stew dressed like she’s off to go star on the French version of The Good Wife?” I thought, “ooh, I love that hair.” You guys, that hair would make most people look like they inadvertently had their head sucked into the automatic hand-dryer in the ladies room. And I’ve never seen K Stew in a proper suit before, and would never think of her as being a person who would ever even put a suit anywhere near her body. HOWEVER. This ad makes me think that maybe she should, even if that means she’s somehow going to need to magick a way to live in a wholly black and white world, like the beginning of The Wizard of Oz forever. Because I sort of think this entire endeavor just might be….successful? (The bag, of course, is a classic. I am not a Quilted Chanel Bag Person, and even I realize that this bag is a classic.)

Hit me with your thinkpieces, please.

[Photo: Chanel]