Um, the Emmys are tonight. The red carpet is starting LITERALLY RIGHT NOW. NO TIME TO LINGER.
Fug File: VMAs
Okay, Lucy Hale’s has pink in it. But it’s so CHEERFUL, so it’s our lead-off hitter. Look at me, dangerously breaking the rules a mere half-hour before the Emmys red carpet starts! It’s bedlam ALREADY! WHAT WILL HAPPEN TOMORROW.
[Photos: Getty, Splash, Fame/Flynet]
I watched all kinds of gymnastics and swimming this weekend — Phelps beat Lochte in the hundred-meter butterfly at the Pan-Pacific Games and it made me very excited for Rio in 2016, although Ryan kind of looked like he might sink the rest of the time — and so I keep looking at Uzo Aduba, Taylor Schilling, and Laverne Cox, and imagining how they should be rearranged per a medal stand. Hint: Not in this order.
[Photos: Splash, Getty]
This is a preponderance of sternum, and not a whole lot of ANYTHING flattering besides.
I mean, stick a matching turban on her and put her in a lily pond, scratching the face of her bitter rival over the leathery old coot they both inexplicably want to bang, then YEAH, I’ll go on that ride. But Dynasty is not a trip every 22-year old is meant to take. Or, any.
You’re welcome for the earworm.
Sarah Hyland must have a new stylist. She used to be all samey-looking Marchesas, and now she’s trying out all kinds of different silhouettes.
Unfortunately, she also seems to be trying on stuff that was assembled in five minutes by someone who was using a stapler and only one hand.