Fugger: Taylor Swift

Fug or Fab the Covers: Taylor Swift, Recently

She is vaguely unrecognizable in these, am I right? Not in a way where I think she’s been overly Photoshopped. More in a way where she’s just been styled and photographed in a way that’s different enough from her usual that it warrants a second look.

[Photos: Australian Vogue, GQ]


VMAs Fug Carpet: Taylor Swift in Ashish

You know what? I have a high tolerance for Taylor, but I just can’t with this, to use MTV-appropriate vernacular:


Those shoes are great, but she’s wearing sparkly houndstooth sweatpants that she kept pulling up all night (so as not to violate the Taylor Swift Anti-Bellybutton Guidelines) with a matching cropped top. There is no human alive who can really wear sparkly houndstooth sweatpants without looking slightly absurd, but definitely not when that human also makes the choice to go really matchy-matchy with that particular life choice. Okay, wait, that’s a lie. Gwen Stefani could wear this. But Taylor is no Gwen Stefani (although if she starts making her squad wear harajuku outfits, then we might need to revise that) — not even at the VMAs.

[Photpo: Getty]


Well Played, More Or Less: Taylor Swift on Vanity Fair

With the caveat that this is so 80s, it could be outtakes from a secret project where T.Swizzle reboots the collective works of Judith Krantz. OMG TAYLOR, PLEASE DO THAT.

[Photos: Vanity Fair]


Fugs and Fines: Taylor Swift

Oh, man, T. Swizzle:

Taylor Swift Steps Out In New York City

I love you, but this is not a reboot of Singles. Wait, IS IT? No, no — the 90s had nearly no side-ab, unless your name was Marky Mark. Phew. The crop-top/overalls combo threw me off for there for a sec. A long, terrifying second.

This is better:

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Well Played: Taylor Swift

Yes, it’s that time of year again.

taylor swift candid nyc summer

We’ve officially entered the season of Taylor Swift Wears Tiny Things Around New York In Such A Way That Makes Me Swear I Will Break Every Bad Habit I Have And Do So Many Lunges Always and Juice Everything Even Though Who Are We Kidding Pass The Cheeseball and Don’t Skimp On The Crackers. Such a wonderful annual tradition. I MIGHT not have work those shoes with this — I can’t decide — but that’s hardly the point.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]


Billboard Music Awards Fug or Fab: Taylor Swift in Balmain

Balmain seems rather into the Groovy Jumpsuit business right now.

taylor swift billboard music awards

I mean, does it look BAD on her? No. But does it enchant me? No. Do I appreciate the bracelet? Yes. Do I feel like the outfit itself belongs on the gum-smacking girlfriend of a porn entrepreneur having a pool party in the ’70s for some rich backers? Bingo. I’m all for Taylor Swift stretching, and trying new things, and lord knows she’s got the twentysomething sculpted bod for this exact outfit (if not any visible feet). And every time I’m about to dismiss it outright, I glance up again and think, “Dammit, Taylor, I can’t quit you.”

And then I look at the back:

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Fug or Fab the Cover: Taylor Swift on Elle, June 2015

Well, I really like it from the waist up:


I think her hair looks awesome, and her facial expression is interesting (that’s not a euphemism for “HIDEOUS,” or anything. I legitimately am interested in her face in this photo [and in general; Taylor's face is a good face (this sentence got away from me)]). I am not sure what she’s doing with the guitar over her head like that — she’s not surely going to smash an acoustic guitar? Guitar smashing feels more ELECTRIC to me — but if I don’t think about that too much, I am on board. But — and I CANNOT BELIEVE I AM ABOUT TO SAY THIS — I almost wish this jumpsuit were a romper. Taylor apparently has a long torso, which she dresses really well because I never noticed it up until now. (I ALSO have a long torso, so this is a configuration to which I am sensitive.) But now it’s all I can see.  Or am I crazy? Am I just TORSO OBSESSED because I’m a narcissist? Did I just ruin this for you? Are you actually wearing this to work today? TAYLOR, IS THAT YOU? I listened to 1989 while we were writing the book a lot, so I owe you a debt. And that debt is possibly being paid by my suggesting a romper. I DON’T KNOW WHO I AM ANYMORE.