Fug File: lace

AMAs Unfug Or Fab: Kerry Washington


Too much going on here for me, I think.

We’ve got sheer smockage, we’ve got long hanks of fringe, we’ve got a minidress underneath… at least the yellow color makes it interesting (if it were a black dress we’d all be in a coma right now), but how could this be better? Less fringe? MORE fringe? More lining, and maybe… a belt? I don’t know, but I do know this: I wish Kerry Washington wore her hair like this on Scandal, because the immobile flip they make her sport is starting to distract me. I don’t think it’s budged all year. Olivia Pope deserves something sassy, not stiff.

[Photo: Getty]

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Unfug or Fine: Maggie Gyllenhaal, With An Assist From Hot Viola Davis


So, yeah, I do realize this is a jumpsuit, and yet I am not approaching it with abject disapproval. I KNOW. I’m sure the lightheadedness of Abfest 2012 still has me in its clutches.

But seriously, that doesn’t look awful on her. At least, I don’t think so — okay, so part of it is sitting weirdly on her chest, like it’s sagging or needed to be pinned/pressed/taped, but it’s such a small thing. Otherwise, from this angle, I am far less enraged by the jumpsuit itself than I expected. My bigger question is with the styling, specifically the choice of jacket:

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Fug or Fab: Kristen Wiig


This looks so familiar to me, and I had to rack my brain into split pea soup before realizing that I think it’s from the same family of Stella McCartney stuff as this jumpsuit, and these items worn by Rachel McAdams and Rumer Willis.

I think, understandably, that people get sick of me harping on about hating jumpsuits all the time. I get that. I get bored of me, too. It’s just that I have a very hard time being case-by-case with them, especially when Stella McCartney herself — who, by the way, seems like she has a great sense of humor – said that when she wore her version she had to have help going to the bathroom. AT THE MET BALL. So there’s a practicality hump I can’t get over, in addition to general recurring concerns about polterwang (not present here, thank goodness) or Inflating Pelvis Syndrome (marginally present) or any of a number of other concerns. Is this the worst jumpsuit, or even the worst version of THIS jumpsuit, that I have ever seen? No. Does that save it? I leave that to you. The harpy is letting YOU speak.

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Fug or Fabs: Miley Cyrus


Heather and I have noted before that we are prone to a kind of Stockholm Syndrome with the people we fug. You cover them long enough and the next thing you know, you have developed — AGAINST YOUR WILL — a kind of fondness for them. Or, as in my case with Vanessa Hudgens, thanks to her Run of Insanity in the current Fug Madness, you fall in love with them.  It’s not a I Want To Make Out With You love, as much as it is an I Want to Clap My Hands With Glee Over Your Wardrobe; Please Never Change kind of love, but LOVE IT IS. And the point is, I think I’m falling in love with Miley similarly. It all started when she chowed down at a food truck, where all great romances begin, with bonus points for how terrible The Last Song is.  Mix that all up in your mind blender and here we are — I think she might look kind of good, but I have NO IDEA if I can trust my own judgement. LOOK AND JUDGE:

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Fug of Thrones


On one hand, this is insane:

On the other hand, I am TOTALLY inspired to do some vintage tablecloth shopping right about now.

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Happy Birthday, Fug or Fab: Kate Middleton


Today is Kate “Duchess of Cambridge” Middleton’s 30th birthday! And happy birthday to her.  I had the (national) news on in the background while I was making dinner last night, and I overheard the newscaster say the following (which I have paraphrased, but only slightly): “Since marrying Prince William, Kate Middleton hasn’t taken a step wrong…EXCEPT SHE HASN’T HAD A BABY YET.”  DUM DUM DUM DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN. To which I say: a) dude, they haven’t even been married a year! b) her husband is in the military! c) she is not the ONLY PERSON RESPONSIBLE FOR KNOCKING HERSELF UP, and d) she has to host the OLYMPICS in August. She has STUFF ON HER PLATE. GIVE A SISTER A BREAK. I’m sure she is well aware of the fact that gestating an heir to the throne is a big part of her job description, given how she is a sentient being who grew up being taught basic British history. Let’s give those kids at least a year to be married before we all start flinging ourselves off the Tower of London, wailing “BUT WHAT OF HER BARREEEEEENNN WOOOOOOOOOOOOOMB” on the way down. It’s all going to be fine. But is her outfit?

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