Fug File: BAFTAs

BAFTAs Unfug or Fab: Elizabeth Olsen


First, I want to discuss the nefarious black-gloved hand that is photobombing this picture. She’s looking all glamorous and healthy-haired, and then some dude behind her is passing photocopied national secrets with the nonsense code phrase, “I’ve always thought giraffes were the ones we should fear,” or something.

Onto the gown: Well, there’s definitely a germ of something here, and I don’t mean the norovirus kind. The detail work on all this lights my candle, but then the vigorous peplum and strap-lashes snuff it out again. I wish I could make it strapless and sleek — there’s a heavyness to it with the size of the apron on it, so I’d settle for lopping that off entirely to see if we’re more buoyant. Maybe the feathers would survive.

Or, there’s an alternate approach:

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BAFTAs Fug Carpet: Jennifer Garner


Oh, boy. And we had been on such a good run.

Let’s hope this is a classic case of saving the best for last.

[Photo: Getty]

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BAFTAs Well Played/WTF: Andrea Riseborough


Let’s start with the good news:

This dress hugs her correctly and is super cheerful, which I appreciate. Minor nit: I think she needed a stronger lip with this color — we’ve established that some form of dark red usually helps the canary-yellow dress sing, and oh lordy, I just noticed that hacky wordplay which I SWEAR was totally accidental, but which I’m leaving in there just so you can share a groan with me. If I don’t slap my own wrist, then who will?

Anyway, I think you’ll agree that this is an actual ray of sunshine compared with what she wore to a pre-party.

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BAFTAs Wackily Played: Helen Mirren


You are cordially invited to the wedding of Glinda the Good Witch and Khaaaaaaaan. Please indicate whether you’d like as your entree the bubble gum, or the mind-controlling eels.

[Photo: Getty]

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BAFTAs Who Fugged It More: Amy Adams or Alice Eve


I’m a little afraid of this dress.

It makes me think of the Headless Horseman. Like, her torso is a spindly wood after dark, and someone is going to ride through it with his decapitated head on a saddle just to freak out some weary travelers with the mess and pernicious smell. And, relatedly, the dress also makes me think of creeping rot. All of these are words a lady dreams of having written underneath her picture someday.

Alice’s dress is less elaborate:

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BAFTAs Well Played: Anne Hathaway (With Bonus Thing That Makes You Go Hmm)


This has been such an interesting season for Anne Hathaway.

One minute she’ll bust out something awesome like this studded Burberry, and it makes me think, “Curses, Hathaway, you’ve won again.” And then she’ll show up with a dress that itself has a skirt on:
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