Fugger: Diane Kruger

Fugs or Fabs: Diane Kruger

I feel kind of bad that I have recently obsessed myself with Diane Kruger’s uterus and whether it has an occupant. I mean, if I were a celebrity, right now all the bloggers and tabloids would be screaming that I am KNOCKED UP when really I’ve just been hitting the transfats way too hard over the last six weeks. That being said, I don’t think Diane looks transfatty. I think she looks, here, like she’s trying to create a WAISTLINE DIVERSION:

Let’s be honest, you guys: That shit is suspicious.

But this isn’t, so it’s possible that my Freakish Ability to Predict Celebrity Pregnancies is on the fritz:

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Fugs and Fabs: The Peter Pilotto For Target Party

This stuff might actually be cute, which is too bad, because it’s going to sell out about ten minutes after it goes on sale and then I’ll only ever see it on eBay at an extreme markup.

[Photos: Getty]


The Recent Fugs and Fabs of Diane Kruger

Fug Nation Bumpwatch — officially declared at the Golden Globes — is still on.

[Photos: Getty, PacCoastNews]



Golden Globes Fug or Fine: Diane Kruger

Rumor has it she and Pacey are betrothed. My Uterine Secret sensor is now pinging.

[Photos: Getty]


It Was A Very Good Year: Diane Kruger, The Risk-Taker

Before we get into 2014 in earnest, we decided to take a more focused look back at a couple people who put together very nice fashion years in 2013. These aren’t absolute choices, nor exhaustively researched ones; just the people who, when we were looking for our favorite and least-favorite single looks, seemed to pop up a lot in our “win” columns.

Diane Kruger’s clothes veer from CRAZY to CRAZY GOOD with rarely anything in the grey zone between them. This year, she had a pretty impressive batting average. If Cate Blanchett went gloriously off the rails, then Diane stayed gloriously on them.


Unfug It Up: Diane Kruger

If this weren’t sheer, I would be all over it:

If This Weren’t Sheer, by the way, is the name of the soulful album of slow jams I plan to release next year, based on the experience of covering 2013′s red carpets. You’ll love such hot tracks as “WORDS,” “Why? and “WTF?!?” as well as the album first single, “Why Don’t You Just Stab Me In The Face?” I’m probably going to open for Miley, in a totally post-modern, self-reflexive artistic statement wherein the headliner will be recreating the art I created about the headliner.

That being said, I really do think that if we could line this sucker, she could pop up on Reign and teach those anachronistic bitches some lessons. How would you fix it?

[Photo: WENN]