Fugger: Carrie Underwood

ACMs Fug and Fabs: Lightbox Purge


Am I crazy, or does Spears The Younger look pretty darn cute for her big return to the public eye? I mean, yeah, she’s wearing hair from Ye Olde Underwood Wig Shoppe, but she’s got a bracelet AND there’s nary a nude shoe in sight.

[Photos: Getty]

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Fug the Promo Materials: “The Sound of Music” Live on NBC


IT IS UPON US: Tonight, NBC is airing a three-hour live Sound of Music extravapalooza starring Carrie Underwood and Stephen “True Blood” Moyer (or as I’m calling him, Compton Von Trapp).┬áIt’s based on the Broadway musical and not the movie, which means the songs and who sing them change a little. This skews my expertise because I’ve never seen the stage show, due to being so enamored of the film and Julie Andrews and Christopher Plummer and Charmian Carr and Eleanor Parker’s fascinating drawn-on eyebrows and Marni “Eliza Doolittle’s Voice” Nixon and (I almost wrote Marti Noxon, although if she had been in it I’m sure I’d have loved her too) and Lila Quartermaine and Future Mrs. Robert Urich and Friedrich’s teeth and KURT THAT’S THE ONE I FORGOT GOD BLESS KURT and even crazy somewhat-hard-to-listen-to Peggy Wood. While we wait to see how this version stacks up — we will be tweeting throughout the West Coast airing at @fuggirls; what’s the over/under on how far into this thing we’re thrown into Twitter jail? — let’s dish the promotional/rehearsal stills.

And no, we are not being paid to discuss the poster; longtime readers of the site, or even possibly short-time readers of the site, should not be surprised that Jessica and I have been looking forward to this with equal parts glee and dread. It likely won’t have anything as glorious as Plummer’s near-homicidal delivery of “THERE ISN’T GOING TO BE ANY BARONESS… ANYMORE” and Friedrich’s teeth screaming “FRAULEIN MARIA’S COME BACK FROM THE ABBEY” about ten seconds too late. But it has Audra McDonald, so… I’m listening.

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You The Jury: Carrie Underwood at the CMAs


I should just rename this category to “Carrie Underwood Gets Tried, Convicted, And Sent Up The River.”

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[Photos: Getty, Splash]

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Emmy Awards Fugs and Fabs: Purple


It kills me when a bold color goes awry, but… Alyson Hannigan, you seem so nice, and this dress is full-on Mean Girling you.

[Photos: Getty]

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CMTs Fug Carpet: Carrie Underwood


Gwyneth Paltrow is totally going to have this in her wardrobe… when she’s retired and living in Palm Beach.

The sleeve length is weird. The shorts are a torrid mess. And the color even looks like my grandparents’ yacht club’s after-dinner mints tasted. Oh, and yes, there IS a frosted porthole on her bum:

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ACM Awards Well Chosen: Carrie Underwood


I say “well chosen” instead of “well played” because, while I love this, I am not entirely sure the two of them were M.F.E.O. Which is to say, “made for each other,” which, if you have ever seen Sleepless in Seattle, you probably cannot read without seeing in your mind’s eye the expression of nauseated shock on Meg Ryan’s face while she translates it thusly from a letter she believes Tom Hanks wrote. Good times.

[Photos: Getty]

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Grammys Dramatically Played: Carrie Underwood


It’s not that this isn’t pretty — it is. But I just don’t have anything to say about it. There’s nothing to say. It is the kind of dress that begs, “If you’re not going to get married in me, then at least project a bunch of electronic yada-yada onto me so that her pelvis becomes a movie screen.” How fortunate, then, that she heard what it was screaming.

[Photos: Getty]

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