Fugger: Anne Hathaway
working on The Royal We, our new book (it’s loosely based on Kate Middleton), and even the pianist at the Dorchester was murdering it. You haven’t had tea until you’ve done it to a jauntily rendered tune about a dying prostitute. ANYWAY. I have some sympathy for Anne, and part of that comes from the fact that this reminds me of her Burberry BAFTAs dress from last year but it isn’t as good. Let’s take a closer look
[Photos: Getty, Splash]
Anne Hathaway took some time out of the public eye after she won all the awards and made America’s eyes roll out of their heads and down the street to the local bar. That may not have been WHY she backed away, exactly, but I’m sure the backlash and the whole dress fiasco took a lot out of her — plus she probably just wanted to be married and quiet for a while and catch up on all the TV clogging her DVR. But now she has surfaced.
And that’s a very tentative reappearance. The color of the dress is about all the oomph this has; the cut isn’t very flattering — it’s a total Uterine Secret style — and the little piece of detail right over her Hathacave gives the illusion from a distance that we are sightseeing there, when in fact it’s opaque and patterned. The shoes have a little twinkle, which is cute, but they do nothing to enhance or elevate the overall aesthetic. And as much as I grew to like the pixie cut on her for a while there, this iteration of it isn’t as stylish. It ages her. So the whole thing for me is underwhelming, a little seasonally off (it’s only spring in the southern hemisphere, girlfriend), and 0verall feels kind of like she would rather STILL be sitting at home catching up on all the TV clogging her DVR. I don’t blame her. Sleepy Hollow isn’t going to watch itself.
I mean, the good news is that she looks adorable from the waist up? Let’s just stick to that.
So, I really, really was not sold on Anne’s blonde hair at the Met Ball. I will be the first to say that I ALSO didn’t think her features were optimized with the short hair, and then she had that awesome phase where she grew it out super stylishly and I fell in love with it and think she should keep it that way forever. So maybe I will come around on the blonde, too.
Having said THAT, I am not there yet — I think it’s way too brassy for her features, and I don’t like the phase that the short style is in right now (I felt that way when it was still brown, too), so that might be affecting my feelings too. Again, I fully realize I may eat those words in like two weeks when she does something fabulous to it and suddenly I want her to be a gilded lily forever, but fortunately, I enjoy eating, so that’s fine.
As for the dress, I don’t mind the idea of the shape and volume here, but I think in execution it’s making her look weirdly droopy. So basically, the last two times she’s worn baby pink, it’s caused boobular scrutiny that she’d probably rather have avoided. Please let’s not go for the charm with a third try.