Fug File: CMA Awards

You The Jury: Carrie Underwood at the CMAs


I should just rename this category to “Carrie Underwood Gets Tried, Convicted, And Sent Up The River.”

Has the jury reached a verdict?

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[Photos: Getty, Splash]

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CMAs Well Played, Taylor Swift


Well, when your album is called Red, what else are you supposed to wear?

[Photos: Getty]

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CMA Awards Fug or Fab: Tim McGraw and Faith Hill


TIM: We are so coordinated!

FAITH: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

TIM: That wasn’t a joke, babe. Just an observation. We look like two formal salutes to the black and white cookie.

FAITH: Jerry Seinfeld once said that he loved the black and white cookie because it was two races of flavor living side by side in harmony, and a wonderful thing. LOOK TO THE COOKIE, TIM. LOOK TO THE COOKIE.

TIM: And then he and Elaine fought a woman over a babka. I don’t know if Seinfeld is a good sartorial inspiration. Although I do agree with George that we really should all drape ourselves in velvet.

FAITH: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

TIM: You are acting so weird tonight.

FAITH: The truth is, I’m uncomfortable in this.

TIM: Why? You look comfortable! It’s fetching.

FAITH: I am just more accustomed to wriggling around in pleather football pants.

TIM: You can put those on when we get home.

Your turn!

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CMA Awards Fug or Fab: Kelly Clarkson


I was going to fug this. And then I was going to give it a Well Played. I was swinging like a tire roped to a tree in some warmly lit Cialis commercial.

In the pro column, as someone said to us on Twitter, it does have an aura of a royal decoration. Our Tweeter likened it to a Tudor tapestry; I would’ve gone for wallpaper or a chair covering ¬†somewhere in Windsor Castle. It’s sumptuous. But then we get to the cons: ¬†What is happening with her left boob? Does the high waist on the skirt seem constricting to anyone else? Is the whole thing royal in the way where you suspect this is the wrapping paper the Queen has used on everyone’s birthday gifts since 1968?

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[Photo: Getty]

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You The Jury: Carrie Underwood at the CMAs


It’s that time again: Carrie Underwood hosted an awards show that — seemingly — featured more of her costume changes than actual statuettes. So bring out your yellow lined notepads and Bic pens, and arrange your faces into your best impassive stares as you file into the box and consider the evidence before making a judgment.

Has the jury reached a verdict?

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[Photos: WENN, Getty]

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CMA Awards Fug or Fab: Hayden Panettiere


I kind of love this. But that may just be because I want to put it on and shimmy on a table wearing it.

What do you think?

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