Fug File: blue
I really wish you could see the wonk in socialite Tara P-T’s nose. It basically recently collapsed, because — she’s admitted this — prolonged cocaine use jacked it up almost beyond repair. She kept touching the right side of it really gingerly, as if making sure it hadn’t shifted any further to the left. Oh, Tara. You are a delight.
A delight, and presumably a canoeing enthusiast, as she’s strapped one to her skull. Do we think this is what became of Violet Beauregard? A rampant drug habit brought on by years of ritual juicings, ending in her at a royal wedding holding her nose in place while a very cold horizontal Dutch person goes clogging on her forehead? Poor Violet. At least Veruca got a golden egg on her way down to the incinerator.
Oh, Kylie Minogue:
You are adorable, and I want this outfit. Sure, it’s 100% YSL and therefore would cost me, like, a couple months worth of rent. But I’m just saying. If The Secret is real (it’s not), then this package that Jose, my UPS guy (we’re friends; I order a lot of stuff) just delivered from Amazon will ACTUALLY contain this outfit, instead of what I’m pretty sure it really contains (Ponds face wipes, duct tape, organic bug spray). EVERYBODY THINK POSITIVE.
[Photo: Pacific Coast News]
Well, well, well. What have we here?
It seems the Widow Longoria is branching out…TO THE GREAT WHITE WAY.
Right? She is on her way to a performance of the All Singing, All Tap-Dancing, All Navy-Blue Bazooms Over Broadway, isn’t she? This is going to be epic!
What? She’s going to Letterman? Are you sure? Really? Okay. No, I believe you. I’m sure you know what you’re talking about.
Um. Nice legs? Sure. Let’s just stick with that.