If applicable — and at all possible — please try to set aside the stirring in your loins and just consider Alcide here on his clothing’s dubious merits.

Indeed, many of you may hate this on the sole basis that they are clothes, and that he is wearing them (and to you I say: Be strong, for Magic Mike is coming soon). Others of you may love it because there is something magnetic about him even though he kind of has Scott Foley’s old Felicity hair — which might not be a bad thing; it’s just that I only now noticed, and now it’s all I can see. Still more of you may think it’s fully bangin’ on its own merits.

But my issues are: whether a butterfly is about to birth itself from the caterpillar-made womb that is his necklace; and why he felt the need to button his vest over a scarf. Was he trying to anchor his fringe there? Did his crotch need a curtain? Did it, after the Magic Mike experience, begin insisting upon waiting to make an entrance until the music and lighting and state of lubrication is just-so? If it’s that, well, I hope he built a confetti cannon into his zipper, or else all that buildup will feel like it was for naught.

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[Photo: FameFlynet]