Fugger: Miley Cyrus

What The Fug: Miley Cyrus in Whatever, I’m Bored.

Miley Cyrus has laid somewhat low this year, in part because she’s been touring so much — I guess “performing while straddling a giant hot dog” doesn’t necessarily count as laying low, but at least she’s making you pay to see that — but she’s in New York right now and has popped by Fashion Week parties, and well, she’s back to her Fug Madness form.

Miley Cyrus drug sunglasses

This photo is really just a warning. Do you see those white circles? That is her entire shirt in the next photo, and so if you are reading this at work, please make sure your boss is on board with nudity. Do not let Miley Cyrus get you fired. Do not let her come in like a wrecking ball, nor leave you crashing in a blazing fall. Okay? Let’s proceed.

All she ever did was wre-e-eck meeeee


VMAs Fug Carpet: Miley Cyrus

She’s raising her hands in the air like she just don’t care… and actually, she really seriously might not.

[Photos: Getty, Fame/Flynet]


Fugging Ball: Miley Cyrus

My husband walked by as I was examining this photo and he said, “Yeah, you should write about that hat.”

Miley Cyrus (1)

It is amazing that he thought it was a hat, although I don’t blame him for trying to live in sweet, sweet denial. Pretending it’s a hat is a tender way of avoiding the reality that it’s something she attached to her hair:

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Fabs, Fugs, and WTFs: The World Music Awards Show

I do not know that they put in the champagne in Monte Carlo before this event started, but this show looks like it was all over the place.

[Photos: Getty]


Fug the Cover: Miley Cyrus on Elle, May 2014

Elle UK put her on the cover nearly a year ago, and I liked it better, mostly for what I will call Facial Awareness reasons. I’ve included those at the end so that you can compare, because I am a giver, and it IS Thursday, so we can call it a throwback.

[Photos: Elle]


Fug the “Cover”: Miley Cyrus on Seventeen

There has to be a secret story about this cover. Right?

Because that’s not a cover — it’s a “cover,” by which I mean, that’s just a photograph of Miley from a red-carpet event in February. Specifically, this one. And while her face and hair DO look perfectly nice here, it seems INCREDIBLY strange for Seventeen – supposedly one of the premier teen mags, and without even that much competition to worry about — to be slapping a Getty Images photo on its cover. Was it, in keeping with the “Freebie” theme, a money-savings? Is Seventeen too broke for a photo shoot? Is it lazy because it has no competition outside of Teen Vogue? Do we think Miley was scheduled to do one and then had to bail, for some mysterious reason? (This is the one I’m hoping for, because I like gossip.) Or is this happening all the time with Seventeen and I just didn’t notice because I am *cough, cough* a tiny wee bit out of its demographic? I mean, I could’ve dummied up this cover in ten minutes with Photoshop. This can’t bode well. Come on, Seventeen, pull it together. If the world can’t have Sassy or YM anymore, it needs you.