VMAs Party Hilarious Carpet: Melody Thornton

Can we talk about what’s on Melody Thornton’s head?

Yes. It is a headband on steroids. It’s what would happen if Blair Waldorf and Blair Warner went into the headband designing business together. It’s like a bridal headdress for a Tudor-themed wedding on crack. I want someone to always be wearing this headgear, everywhere, at all times, just so I know that somewhere in the world, two girls are giving each other the surreptitious “what is she wearing” look over cocktails. Don’t front: You KNOW you’ve made that look to a friend of yours recently.

Let’s see what one pairs with a cracked out historically inaccurate bridal crown:

Totally normal. Cute, even. Thank god SOMEONE realizes You Can’t Fight The Headband.

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Comments (34):

  1. mary

    …its traditional African head dress. I love this blog but your view of fashion really needs to be more faceted.

  2. Stefanie

    That headband is right out the wedding section of the June 1987 JC Penny catalog.

  3. gene

    you mean arabic headdress

  4. Sandra

    Gorgeous girl. Hate the shoes. Not discussing the head-thing.

  5. BB_Brune

    hi hi hi, I was slightly distracted when I started scrolling down and I stopped so only the forehead was visible, I could swear it was a baby with a freakishly large head…

  6. Amoki

    I didn’t recognize the headdress as being related to a specific culture, arabic or african – would someone mind linking examples? My google search didn’t turn up anything that looked like this.

  7. Autumn Van Weir

    Is she planning on winning the gold in the winter games? Is she singles or doubles skating?


  8. Lynne

    Huh. You know, I wouldn’t hate the headdress if it were paired with something a bit more elegant. Doesn’t really fit with a short dress to me. The dress is cute in a 60s throwback kind of way. Like I could totally see Goldie Hawn wearing to a Laugh-In wrap party in 1969.

    The shoes are hideous though.

  9. Lina

    She looks so great from the neck up. It’s the dress that really bugs me. The sleeves are weird and the skirt is so short that I expected it to at least be backless or something, but no. And the gold belt is just sitting there, slightly out of place. So, headdress/headband is FINE (and fun!), her face is lovely, the dress is no.

  10. Caitlin

    The dress is way too short for the volume on the sleeves, the gold belt is tacky, and those shoes are really ugly.

  11. Brooke

    She is so pretty, so I wonder why she opted to borrow Kim Kardashian’s tarantula lashes for the night. I actually think she is working the dress. Don’t despise the shoes (but too matchy-matchy with the belt). The head thing? Just no. I think I saw it in Michael’s (the craft store) in the do-it-yourself wedding section.

  12. VJ

    I agree with Amoki…if people want to claim it’s an “African” headdress, perhaps give us a country, ethnic group, or tribe, because I’m sure it’s not traditional in all 53 (I think) nations…and it doesn’t quite fit with either of my two points of reference (one east African, one west African). Also, even if it’s traditional wedding gear…I’m 99% sure she’s not coming from, at, or on her way to a wedding. I also think it’s pretty, regardless! Even if perhaps a tad Too Much.

  13. islandgirl1

    I went to an entire exhibit of traditional African hair styles and head dresses from throughout the Continent. I didn’t see anything like this. I’m not trying to say that that means this isn’t a take on some type of traditional African (or Arabic) headdress, but I too would like to know more/see some examples, because I’m really curious.

  14. jbeans

    I agree with Amoki and others. First, provide a link or even a wiki page- I’ve never seen an African or Arabic head band like this before. Second, this isn’t some sort of religious or cultural statement she’s making- she’s never worn any sort of ceremonial headdress before (at least to my knowledge and Google searching.) it would be quite different if they were mocking someone for wearing a burka or yarmulke, but this is head band on steroids.

  15. Anne B

    ExCUSE me, everyone. Have you all forgotten your manners?

    Miss Thornton, I wish you every happiness in your future. With your headdress. Whatever its provenance. Have you registered for any knee-length skirts? …

    (See, now. Was that so hard?)

  16. Eliza Bennett

    The shoes. My god. It’s a scroll up and scrolldown fug simultaneously.

  17. Kate

    Totally normal? Did you overlook the sleeves that are so blousy they have to blouse twice? Not to mention the shoes that could fill in for Thor’s hammer.

  18. Kate

    Also, whether or not the headband is or is not traditional garb of some region is really irrelevant. ‘Traditional’ and ‘fashionable’ are not the same thing. If a Norwegian actress turned up in a Bunad to an event, it would still get fugged.

  19. Marvelous A

    Win, Kate. Uffda.

    This looks just like the traditional Vietnamese wedding headpiece Kim wears in Miss Saigon. Too costume-y for public consumption, methinks.

  20. jo

    I hope her ice dancing routine is to “Princess Leia’s Theme”

  21. vandalfan

    Bad headband and slap to worse sleeves to “ick – that- belt” to WHOA, shoestrosity!

  22. Kara

    I’m with those who do not recognize this as a traditional headdress of any kind. If it is, I would love (not sarcasm) to see other examples.

    Leaving that aside, those shoes are INSANE. The dress would be cute with just plain old regular long sleeves – I love long-sleeved minidresses. I’ve never been a fan of the blousy sleeve, and this is no exception.

    But those SHOES. Gah!

  23. Hope

    well I love the overall look, while agreeing that the shoes, Payless belt (sorry, Payless) and parachute sleeves gotta go. I love the headband.

  24. Noire

    To me, the head thingie screams Maid Marion more than anything.

  25. witjunkie

    Regardless of origin, anything made of white satin with pearls is going to invite an bridal comparison. If this ensemble had been in a color, it might have been a different discussion.

    I like the dress, I think short dresses with long sleeves are chic. These particular sleeves are…roomy. But I looooove her earrings. I wish I’d had those 20 years ago.

  26. anny

    She stole those shoes from Elton John, didn’t she.

  27. Sajorina

    She looks like Food Network Challenge’s judge Kerry Vincent in the last picture of this article: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/regina-varolli/kerry-vincent-cakes-photos-food-network_b_781457.html#s180184

  28. Molly

    That…… was not what I was expecting. And, anny yes I think Sir Elton would like to have a word with her!

  29. anonymoose

    Why would anyone borrow Kim K’s Spider Eyes, JLo’s Erased Lips, and those inexplicable soul-train-reject meets soccer-goal-net shoes?

    Also, someone rubbed cheetos-dust on her cheeks before the picture was taken. Fire the make-up “artist”!

  30. anonymoose

    imagine the noise those earrings make in the wearer’s ears!

  31. corriner

    Those shoes are reflecting my pearl-clutching right back at me.

  32. lc

    fug – head to toe

  33. Lily1214

    Vegas bride.

  34. Jax

    Thank you for referencing Blair Waldorf and Blair Warner in the same post, ahem, even the same sentence!!! Bless you.