Twilight: Fugging Dawn


I don’t even know what to say about this:

Every time I look at it, I giggle. It’s a velvet suit — excuse me. It’s a CRUSHED VELVET SUIT.  A RED CRUSHED VELVET SUIT. It’s like someone told Jackson Rathbone that he was going to a costume party where everyone was supposed to dress like an Interview With the Vampire megafan, rather than to the premiere of the movie in which HE HIMSELF plays a vampire (albeit complete with hideous wig and scatter-shot accent). In the 90s. And that everyone’s costume had to be constructed solely from remnants scavenged from the costume closet on Melrose Place between October and February, 1994. He would totally win THAT costume contest.

[Photo: Getty]

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Comments (64):

  1. J
    0

    Actually I COULD see this, with EITHER the jacket OR the pants, in an Alan Cummings kind of way… but with both, sigh, it is too much, and he ain’t no Alan…

  2. Amanda
    0

    I don’t know…. I kind of like it. But, only because it seems to fit his personality and because of the event he is wearing it to.

    • Amanda
      0

      I wanted to add, I agree it is Fug. I just still kind of like it.

      • ChristopherD
        0

        I’m tempted to agree. It should be Frock coat length, indeed it should BE a frock coat, but I dunno, this is not a film of book series I will ever see/read, but from what I hear, it fits right in.
        And the only way to become CUMMING-ESQUE is to try (really, really hard.)

  3. bex
    0

    this looks like what the members of nsync would wear to awards shows in the 90s.

  4. Martha
    0

    I’d like to take this opportunity (since you mentioned it) to talk about how ABSURD Jackson Rathbone’s accent in those movies is. Like, I don’t even know what’s going on there. He will be talking normally and then BAM SOUTHERN. It is very disconcerting. Commit to one accent, Jackson. COMMIT.

    Fortunately when (if) I see The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn: Part One: Please Let This Just End Already, I will be too busy covering my eyes to avoid all the secondhand embarrassment of bed-breaking and pillow-tearing and uterus-eating that I’m sure I won’t even notice his weird accent.

    Also, back to the topic at hand: this outfit is horrifying.

  5. Simone
    0

    Aww, it’s Jackson! Who cares about the outfit.

    • Anika
      0

      Cosign. He always makes me Awww.

      And actually I agree with Amanda that this fits in for who he is where he is and I like it.

  6. LG
    0

    It’s not just the “crushed velvet” part, it’s the “doesn’t fit AT ALL” part. If Alan Cumming were wearing it, it would be beautifully tailored. As it is, it’s like he put a 90s boy-band getup in a blender with Christopher Walken’s “Continental” character from SNL, and then poured it all over a Prince impersonator.

  7. regina
    0

    what about the eye makeup? that almost takes the edge off the suit for me.
    must also say that he’s my least favourite twiVamp.

  8. vandalfan
    0

    He looks like the wallpaper from a bad theme pizza restaurant called “Uncle Vito’s” or something.

  9. marlie
    0

    Why does he *always* purse his lips that way? It’s just… weird.

    • Sonia
      0

      And so sad, too, because he has an utterly adorable and charming smile. Enough with the pursed lips, Jackson, stop channeling Keira Knightley!!

      • Sonia
        0

        Oh, and he also has dimples! He just needs to go back to looking like this all the time: http://www.nylonmag.com/?section=article&parid=4697

      • Blanche
        0

        Ugh. I looked at that. Yeah, that definitely does not translate across the generations. Enjoy it, however you manage to do that. Guahhh (shudders).

        Can someone bring back a photo of that blonde kid with the orange face who is dating that redheaded Harry Potter girl? Heather? Jessica?

  10. Jennifer
    0

    I think the important question here is not “Why did he wear THAT?” but rather “Why did ANYONE MAKE THAT???” Seriously, what was the POINT? Could the designer not have grasped that there is not now nor has there ever been nor ever will be ANYONE on this planet who would actually wear that thing well? He or she needs to be stopped because this is the kind of suit that will make the swarthy masses believe that they, too, can be “designers,” and then we’ll all be sorry.

  11. Geemee
    0

    You know, if he wore the jacket with black pants and took off the vest he’d be fine. Crushed velvet in moderation — unless you’re SWINTON or Alan Cumming or a 1974 pimp.

  12. Carolina Girl
    0

    Crushed red velvet is a fabric that should only be used on a sofa in a bordello.

  13. bb
    0

    all i could do was giggle too! thank you for that. i kind of like him more now that he’s “zany.”

  14. Siobhan Blythe Dobson
    0

    Looking at this all I can think of is George Constanza: “I would drape myself in velvet if it were socially acceptable.”

    • elp
      0

      Yesss, those were my thoughts also. Therefore, I love this outfit.

      • fritanga
        0

        Yes, my first thought as well. Not a great role model, Rathbone (OMG don’t you LOVE that name? It’s so made up!). Next I guess he’ll be sporting a large nutria hat and/or a Gortex puffy jacket.

  15. westwardho
    0

    on the other hand, i think we have the answer about which twilight actor was planning to come out.

  16. funderpants
    0

    For someone so frigging hot, Jackson Rathbone can do an uncanny Chode-Assed-Bam-Margera-Giving-Blue-Steel-Duckface. This pic makes me want to take a bath.

  17. jean
    0

    He’s so much more attractive without the wig and pancake make-up. Between Kellen and himself, I’m shocked what’s his name gets so much press.

  18. LizeCK
    0

    Mr. Rathbone, filming has wrapped. On all five movies. And the author hasn’t written any more. I think it’s safe to come out of character now.

  19. AndersonicTK421
    0

    heh, he probably custom-ordered it…

    [Interior, evening ]
    Non-discriminate Tailor: frowning over fabric sample, shaking head
    Chode-Assed-Bam-Margera-Giving-Blue-Steel-Duckface: but I MUST!

  20. Winona (not Ryder)
    0

    I agree… this would be DELICIOUS on Alan Cumming.

  21. JPlum
    0

    Maybe it’s an homage to that time RPattz wore an ill-fitting red velvet jacket and ill-fitting black leather slacks to a Harry Potter event?

  22. Leone
    0

    From a pure fug perspective this is fanfreakingcracktastic. Priceless.

    Yes Alan Cummings would rock this. And it would be tailored to perfection (probably).

  23. Fifie
    0

    Made from the curtains at Tara!

  24. megan
    0

    the face the eye makeup everything is screaming something i dont want him to scream

  25. heather
    0

    Jackson Rathbone is gorgeous. Here, he just looks like he needs a fashion intervention, a bath, and a shave. Ugh.

  26. Aria
    0

    I sorta love it because it is so whacked out and ridiculous. Also, truth be told, it reminds me of a tunic I had back in the 90s that I wore to a Christmas party with a black skirt, tights and combat boots, and thought that I looked totally hot. As there were no cameras at that party to prove me wrong, I can keep thinking that. Poor Jackson here is not so lucky and will probably be horrified at this photo ten years from now.

  27. Joy
    0

    I am a HUGE Jackson fan. I think he is a fantastic actor, musician and all around great person. But when I saw this on the live coverage last night I was all “OH HALE NO!” For real. I immediately tweeted the fug girls and begged them to check this out. Not that they would have missed this. He needs a good woman who will say “there is no way I am walking any carpet with you in that ridiculous ‘my pimp hand is strong’ outfit.”

  28. Joy
    0

    And this suit is Dolce and Gabbana. I thought maybe it had a story. Like it belonged to a rich, eccentric uncle. I need a flow chart for this suit.

  29. Gina Guillotine
    0

    Lovin’ this suit. I’m sorry, but I do! It’s totally appropriate for the event.

    My only complaint is that the shirt/tie/vest is too dark. Perhaps a combination of grey/black or silver/black/white…? I don’t know what I would have done there myself and would have tried on lots of things to see what worked. Maybe a red tie to break up all the black?

    Anyway, I like it. I’d totally wear this, and I’m a woman. Maybe that’s why I like it? LOL

  30. Amber
    0

    I love it! It is so utterly hideous and unfashionable and…and…and I can’t even come up with any more words. It just makes me laugh and it’s hilarious and I don’t care if he’s wearing it as a joke or for real.

  31. Tara
    0

    Crushed velvet, when adorning anyone but a 3 year old girl on Christmas Eve, always makes me giggle. Last month, at a fundraising event my organization put on, a guy came in a tight, black, crushed velvet blazer. Sure, he wore non-velvety pants, but I still laughed at him (behind his back, of course) for it. He thought he was hot stuff, too, and was all flirty with me. Oh, crushed velvet blazer guy. It’s not going to happen.

  32. JK
    0

    Dude, you’re in ‘Twilight’. Isn’t life hard enough as it is? Or is going all Scarlett O’Hara on some unfortunate bordello’s curtains some sort of cry for help?

  33. Alli
    0

    I agree that the suit is a bit oversized…and also velvet, but I think HE is quite pretty;)

  34. giuseppe
    0

    The Jennifer Garner look alike to the right is laughing, not with, but at.

  35. Anne B
    0

    I had a minidress in this fabric. In 1994.

    DUDE. The Clinton Administration just threw up all over your suit …

  36. Blanche
    0

    Ah ha ha ha. ‘Tis a great visual gag. Plus, it probably has the additional merit of cooling off the lustful teenagers. Maybe. Or maybe all they need to charge their hormones is a symmetrical pixie face with groomed eyebrows, crammed into anything, really.

  37. Dazie
    0

    I kind of love this. I have no intention of ever seeing this lame-ass movie (saw the first one with my then-tween daughter. Her review “What the HECK was THAT?” was enough to make us both vow to never see the others) but I like to think that his thought process was something along these lines:
    – Last one. Last one. phew. I just have to make it through tonight, then I can go do something, um, good.
    – Screw it. I’m just going to go cracked out, maybe nobody will ask me for an interview, and I can slip out early and get a pint. Or 7.

  38. Bambi Anne Dear
    0

    If this were ultra slim fitting I’d say I love it. As it is it’s just a crushed red velvet sack. And he has SUCH a pretty face.

  39. Sajorina
    0

    I can’t stop laughing!!! OMG, ew……….

  40. Chasmosaur
    0

    The more I look at this, the more I think he wants to be the Hot Neville of the Twilight franchise.

    Except, you know, Hot Neville is hot because he wears impeccably tailored clothing. This ain’t in that category.

  41. kate
    0

    yeah baby, shagedelic.

  42. AR
    0

    I would like it if it was just the blazer in a different color, but admittedly I do have a weakness for velvet.
    http://www.alwaysroundmidnight.wordpress.com

  43. liza
    0

    no. SO BAD. do you see the shoes?? and the NECK CHAIN? only thing worse than a neck chain is a belly chain.

    it is not 1995. he is not in the Backstreet Boys.

    not to mention it makes him look like 2 feet tall. stump city yo

  44. Kat from Jersey
    0

    I don’t think it’s necessarily the fabric or color of the suit (although I agree.. he’s no Alan Cumming!), but the cut of it. It just looks schlumpy. Maybe it’s just the way the fabric photographs? I dunno. Anyway, he’s cute, but this is a total miss for him.

  45. Alisa
    0
  46. Kirstin
    0

    My brother’s take: “I think it’s a “please stop using me as a sex symbol” cry for help.”

  47. Nic
    0

    Is he related to Basil by any chance….?