Fug File: purple

Fug or Fab: Samantha Barks in Burberry Prorsum


There is something so delicately lovely about this:

And then you start looking closer at the skirt, and you realize that YET AGAIN we’re being taken for a ride by a Granny Pants Bandit, and it’s like, SIGH, can’t something else mug us for our Diet Coke money just ONCE?

SIGH:

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[Photo: Getty]

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Well Played, Amy Adams


I don’t think I have any wise-ass take on this photo. I’ve been staring at it and staring at it, and all I can think of to say is, “Yay purple.”

I mean… maybe a darker eye, if she was going to go light with her lips? But generally, Amy just looks really good — it fits, it flatters, it’s a killer color. And she’s making me want to drop and do forty, except that would never happen because I think my arm muscles are made of pasta. Which you serve with eggplant parmesan, which is the color scheme of that dress and the carpet. Phew. FULL CIRCLE. I didn’t think it was going to happen. Maybe it shouldn’t have.

[Photo: Getty]

 

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Fugs With Benefits


First off: I saw Friends With Benefits on Pay Per View this Christmas — or, as I also call it, The Time Without TV — and you know what? I actually really liked it. JT was good, and Kunis was, as always, charming. They had good chemistry; I can see why he ALLEGEDLY kept trying to ALLEGEDLY nail her. Second off: can we just look back on last year and remember how crazy great she looked all 2011? She had a hell of a year.

Third:

As every sports fan knows, every winning streak ends eventually. As every sports fan ALSO knows, you want to get that one loss out of the way EARLY and at an unimportant game, so you don’t spend the rest of the season waiting for the other shoe to drop and stress-eating. Ergo: way to get that taken care of in January, girl. Go into awards season in good health.

[Photo: Getty]

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Mission Impossible: Fug Protocol


Paula Patton is really gorgeous:

And I believe this dress is what they call Gilding The Lily. Although in this case it’s more like Covering the Lily With All Kinds of Loud Furbelows and Too Much Whatnot , but you know what I mean.

[Photo: Splash]

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Well Played, Michelle Pfeiffer


In case you were wondering:

Michelle Pfeiffer still looks amazing, and, in a miracle of previously unknown portions, ACTUALLY HAS FOREHEAD CREASES LIKE A HUMAN WOMAN OF 53 YEARS OLD. She told Elle that she doesn’t care if people have work done as long as they still look like themselves, but if girlfriend’s touched her face, whoever did it had a brilliantly light hand, because she looks like a person still. A gorgeous person whose shoes and dress I want to steal. Oh, Michelle. You are wearing a hideous wig in the New Year’s Eve preview, and I suspect you might be playing a mousey person with a terminal illness, but you are possibly the ONLY person in that movie whose face I saw and thought, “aw, I’ve missed her!”  Here’s hoping your character at least gets to make out with Zefron before the final gong chimes.

[Photo: Getty]

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CMA Awards Fug Carpet: Emily VanCamp


I wasn’t sure about Revenge at first — it just seemed so down-in-the-mouth for a soapy show about a girl who was, for a spell, actually drawing huge Xs over photos of the people she was ruining — but now I’m sold (helped in part by the fact that I like to whisper hoarsely, “REVENNNNGE,” at the end of every act, that is, when I’m not calling it “rewengay” like Hugh Laurie does in the finale of Blackadder II). The show like that Halloween candy that isn’t my favorite, but whatever, I’m in the mood for something sweet, and then ten bars later I’m like, “Damn, we’re out, I need to go buy a new bag.”

And to make this thematic, I hope Emily VanCamp goes ahead and gets revenge on whomever told her to wear this.

The color is such a delight, but the dress itself feels like the limpest saloon couture imaginable. And damn it to hell for forcing me to use the phrase, “saloon couture.” That shouldn’t exist. Now my mood is as frayed as that bodice.

[Photo: Getty]

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