Recent Fugs: Sophia Bush


I’m truly sorry, Sophia. But you don’t get the “and Fabs” today.

[Photos: Getty]

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Well Played, Elizabeth Banks in Osman


well-played

Oh, Elizabeth Banks. You are great at Giant Wacky Ballgowns, but goodness knows, your more easy-breezy looks are often winners, too. TEACH ME YOUR WAYS:

Love & Mercy Premieres in LA

With the caveat that I think those shoes look like she’s wrapped her feet in Christmas ribbon she overbought in a frenzy at Paper Source. WHICH IS A FEELING I KNOW TOO WELL.

The back keeps it from getting too Snoozeville. Well, the back and also the boobs, I suppose. Check it:

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Well Played, Melissa McCarthy


well-played

melissa mccarthy and jason statham

JASON: Melissa. You look like a long, cool cocktail.

MELISSA: Thanks, Jason. I’ve never gotten that one before.

JASON: Indeed, you leave me stirred, but not shaken, unlike my martinis.

MELISSA: What?

JASON: You might say it paisley to discover… wait, hang on, I’m trying to workshop the pun…

MELISSA: Are you having a stroke?

JASON: No! I’m just being Statham. Jason Statham.

MELISSA: Oh, lord. Is this about James Bond again?

JASON: Don’t you think I’d be a good one?

MELISSA: I just don’t know, Jason. Being in a spy comedy might kind of spoil that whole 007 spy drama dream.

JASON: But but but! I’m British, and I wear suits, and… there’s wordplay, and…

MELISSA: I don’t know what it is, Jason, but you don’t read James Bond to me. You seem more like That Guy From The Local Pub Who I Hired To Punch My Boss In The Stomach than the world’s slickest secret agent.

JASON: But I’m an action hero! I was Transpondster! And expendable!

MELISSA: Transporter. And The Expendables.

JASON: Whatever! And those car-racing movies! I’ve done it all! I’m FULL BOND.

MELISSA: Chill, dude. It’s time for a Jemma Bond anyway. Let the bodies of MALE suitors pile up like sweaters for a change. People with names like Jack Tickle and Willie Package-Johnson and Peter Codpiece and Eponymous Wang.

JASON: Maybe Jemma Bond can be 008. We could team up. You could get this made. Call your people? Did I mention you look ravishing?

MELISSA: Kick me up to 006 and throw in a part for Bullock, and we’ll see, Statham.

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[Photo: Getty]

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Fug or Fab: Jena Malone in Valentino


fug-or-fab

At last, Jena Malone is using her Powers of Wacky for good.

jena malone love & mercy premiere

Or, mostly good. I think this is about 85 percent wild, diverting, and successful. The other 15 percent is lace. Which may not seem like a big deal, but that’s a whole letter grade, y’all. Lisa Simpson would black out from horror.

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[Photo: Fame/Flynet]

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What the Fug: Rose Byrne in Osman


I actually almost put this up to a Fug or Fab vote, because we’re on a plane today, and polls sometimes generate more of a “talk amongst yourselves” vibe than me straight up hammering something. But I don’t particularly like this, in the end, and naturally I will blab on at length about why.

rose byrne spy premiere

The miniskirt piece sits high and boxy, which isn’t as flattering as it could be, but that’s not my beef. No, my particular cut of steak here is that those high-fashion floor tiles that pass for a skirt are drawing my attention to how weird the human knee looks. I’m not talking about Rose’s knees specifically, which I’m sure are patellar perfection. I’m speaking about the knee in general. How often do you ever actually isolate a human kneecap? Never, until today. And now I’m just staring at it, and y’all, my elegantly intellectual conclusion here is: knees are weird. KNEES ARE WEIRD. They, like any of the words involved on Game of Thrones, need their full context.

[Photo: Getty]

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Your Afternoon Man: David Beckham


I just thought you might need to see this today.

David Beckham Attends Breitling Madrid Store Opening

YOU’RE WELCOME.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]

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