Fugs and Fabs (Mostly Fugs, Though, Let’s Face It): The Dark Shadows Events

During Met Ball Mania, we missed both the U.K. and U.S. premieres of Dark Shadows. And here is where I am about to cast myself away on a lonely island, with nary a balding adventurer, nor hero-complex-imbued doctor, nor fiending rocker, nor former torturer, nor even a raffish rake with MacGyver’d specs to keep me amused. Are you ready? Okay: I am maybe a little weary of Helena Bonham Carter’s style, even though I do recognize that it is super amusing and individual; sometimes I wish she would stop making Tim Burton movies, because seeing her in The King’s Speech reminded me what a terrific actress she still is when she’s not playing a human cartoon all the time; and — this is the biggie – I have never really understood the Johnny Depp thing. I KNOW. I’m sorry. I mean, as an ACTOR, I think he’s very talented, but as a heartthrob, he does not compute for me. Perhaps this is because I missed out on 21 Jump Street because it didn’t air where I grew up? We may never know. But there it is: I would not like to be a Depper too. So bring it. Pillory me, Fug Nation. I know it’s coming. The line forms to the left.

Also within: Michelle Pfeiffer and Eva Green, the latter of whom should totally have her own vigilante alter ego called Dark Shadows.

[Photos: Getty]

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Comments (102):

  1. Eliza Bennett

    I have no throbs anywhere for Monsieur Depp, and I DID watch 21 Jump St. I also don’t get the appeal of Brad Pitt in the 90s and early 00s.

    • China

      I’ve never understood the Johnny Depp thing, either.

      • Karen G

        I completely understand the Johnny Depp thing, and I do want to be a Depper too. Now the Pitt thing, that I don’t comprehend.

        I also do not care for Ms. Greene. I thought she had no chemistry with Daniel Craig in his first Bond movie, and do not think she’s in the least bit attractive – not Bond girl material

        • qwertygirl

          I get both v1 Depp (21 Jump Street) and v1 Pitt (“Thelma & Louise”). I DON’T get v2-5 of either one (scruffy, slimy, unkempt, slightly dirty-looking, and haggard, respectively).

      • Pink Coat

        Me neither! Was watching him on Kimmel the other day and it was unremarkable. I actually fast forwarded through to watch Casey Wilson from Happy Endings.

  2. Mahastee

    Someone has worn that first dress of Eva Green’s before, but I just can’t think who. The navy velvet is FAB, and I say that knowing that there will soon be all sorts of ‘Velvet is Vile’ comments. Oh well. I think she is utterly gorgeous and wonder if she is suffering from the Bond Girl Curse, because she seems to barely ever get cast in anything.

    HBC looks like HBC, which is always delightful. I know I can always count on her to show up without a spray tan, or bleached extensions, and that is a blessed relief.

  3. tarasaurusrex

    I don’t know if I’ll ever be tired of her! (Every time I read/type HBC I think of hormonal birth control….uhh)

    What is up with the high-neck, long sleeve, matronly sheath-type dresses lately? As if I didn’t need another reason to dislike Florence Whatsherface, she goes and wears these all over town. And now this Eva Green person…PLEASE. NO MORE. I don’t really have enough words to fully describe how much I LOATHE that look.

  4. ortenzia

    yeah… it’s a little weird to me that i find eva green more attractive than johnny depp and i’m a hetero-lady. it’s just – how? how? and please teach me.

  5. Wendy

    *gasp* Consider my pearls clutched! Nah, seriously…I personally love me some Johnny, but I get it that he’s not everybody’s cup of tea. It’s all good.

  6. Gina

    No bash from me. Depp always comes across as smug and greasy to me. I wouldn’t even put him in the top ranking of actors, for *me* (just making that clear), because he always seems to play the same quirky part with minor variations, IMO. Scissorhands, Sparrow, Wonka, Barnabas … yawn. On topic, Michelle Pfeiffer still looks stunning, and I love the bronze-y dress on her. It’s understated, but that only emphasizes her fabulous figure and beautiful face.

    Now ducking to one side.

    • Susan

      Yes, totally agree about Depp. You know what would really impress me? A really convincing role as a middle-aged suburban dad.

      • Kat

        Ha! Agreed, Susan.

        I also get that whole artsy-smugness wafting off of him. I feel like he genuinely is the Johnny Depp that we see, but it still reeks of trying too hard. Like, Johnny, stop giving me ART ART ART. We get it.

        • Emily

          I heartily agree with all of these comments. Especially bored during and after all the pirates movies. We get it. You’re kooky.

      • Rubee

        Susan, my same thought! For some reason I envision a movie of him as a normal human being, and not an out-of-this-world (in not a good way) character in costume and make up. I don’t think he’s an exceptional actor, since the crazy clothes and face plastering seem to do all the work for him. I find his fashion sense ridiculous and I do not think he’s attractive at all. I gasp whenever I see his name in “Sexiest Man” and “Best Dressed” lists. Apparently whatever commitee decides who’s “sexy” or “fashionable” gets high before entering in session. There’s this 2000′s notion of ‘wacky eccentric’ being ‘cool’, and that’s why we are supposed to admire him, Chloe Sevigny, Alexa Chung and other frequent fuggers as ‘ fashion icons’.

        HBC, however, it is a very deepp actress,although me too am boring of her clothes, same way GaGa does.

  7. Glee

    I am so happy Michelle P. is out and about – she always looks amazing, really young for her chronological age – but never like she’s been pulled and tucked. If it’s amazing DNA, I want some. If it’s good work – I want the name.

    • crystal

      Seriously! She just looks incredible. I hadn’t thought about her in a little while, so it’s nice to see her out and about and looking hot.

  8. Dave

    The big problem with HBC, IMO, is not that she brings the cray. It’s that she brings the EXACT SAME CRAY EVERY TIME. Every… um… “gown(?)” she wears is identical to the last.

    Recipe for style:
    1) Fill one laundry basket with random fabric samples (mostly black, with a few wild patterns thrown in.
    2) At red carpet time, close eyes and grab 4-5 pieces.
    3) Wrap around oneself at random, taking care to ensure that portions of each fabric are exposed at some point.
    4) Practice kooky expressions in mirror.
    5) EXECUTE.

    PS: Good for her that she doesn’t care.
    PPS: J-Depp’s outfits, as well as all Tim Burton movies, follow roughly the same recipe. Someone please stop their little menage a trois.

    • Shiitake

      The only thing missing is the tiny doll’s hat set at a rakish angle.

  9. jacey

    I was a big Depp fan back in the day. But now I look at him and can’t get past my feeling that I bet he smells really, really bad. Years of french cigarettes and built up hair product.

    • katkin74

      ^ This (not to mention his recent BFFness to one whathisface Manson – that put it over the top)

      • meggiemoo

        Yeah, he’s not aging terribly well. He needs to shake up his style. Please stop appearing in Tim Burton movies…

    • Kris M

      Yeah, I was pretty sure when I saw this that it was a repeat dress. Which was very big for about a month when the Duchess wore a dress twice.

    • ringthing

      That’s it, totally not aging well. He had it going on back in the day. I think he could still have it going on if he’d try washing his hair and dressing like a nicely tailored grownup.

  10. Wendy

    …And furthermore, has Michelle Pfeiffer made a deal with the devil, or something? Because she looks FANTASTIC. Whatever skincare she’s using, I want a piece of that action.

  11. Stefanie

    The reason I want to see Johnny Depp naked is because I want to throw him in the bath tub and give him a good ol fashion scrubbing.

  12. BrownEyedBetty

    He’s one of a kind and seems genuinely humble (when filming in Wisconsin where I live, he came out and shook each and every hand of waiting fans…) plus he usually disappears into the roles he’s given and for that, I’m a fan. Yes, I wish he would shower and for eff’s sake, pull his hair out of his eyes, maybe lighten up on the jewelry and get a shoe-shine. But otherwise, I’m all good with the Depp.

    Eva Green is odd-looking but yes, she’s bringing it.

    (Is it true that she and Johnny hooked up on this film and that’s why he’s currently split from Vanessa..?? I know this is not a gossip spot but couldn’t resist.)

    • Jessica

      That IS the rumor. My own personal feelings about Johnny is that I wish he would stop making Tim Burton films for a while. Because he’s starting to feel — and look — sort of same-y in them, and I think it’d be good for his career to do something REALLY different, visually, for a little.

      • jacey

        I saw it mentioned somewhere that of the two big 90′s heartthrobs, who ever would’ve imagined that Brad Pitt would have the more varied and challenging career. It really is true.

        • Kat

          Absolutely agreed. He’s really limiting himself with the same stuff from Burton over and over and over. I mean, I’m sure he’s having fun, and it’s his call what movies he does, but you’d think from someone who seems to be so proud of his craft, he’d want to demonstrate a little more depth.

        • Katharine

          This, exactly. I also have no throbs for Johnny Depp, but I do think he’s a good actor — and used to have a lot of courage. But this Burton thing he’s doing, it seems lazy now. (Of course, we could also talk about the ridiculous racial appropriation he’s doing as Tonto, but let’s not. If he’s not even sure if his granny was Choctaw or the other thing, he has no rock to stand on there.)

          I do NOT like what he wears on the street. Or the premiere.

          And is it just me, or is Eva Green’s hair showing some normal-coloured roots in that side sweep? (Even more disconcerting than dark roots in their way.)

      • GFY Heather

        If he hooked up with Eva Green, then it is completing his transformation into Tim Burton, because she is totally HBC Lite.

        • Cristina

          Eva Green’s roots are making me feel better about how I sometimes go a little too long before re-blacking my hair. :)

  13. TaraMisu

    I love me some Johnny, but these pictures… UGH. Wash your hair dude.

    Michelle looks divine, she really does need to get out more and Eva is a treasure! Smolder, pose, work it…

  14. eee

    I’m tending to agree with GFY Heather on the Johnny Depp thing these days. He can be so handsome when he’s cleaned up. Even when he’s doing his quirky thing he sometimes looks really great, though often WAAAAAAY over-accessorized, which often kills his look completely for me. But ately he’s like a charicature of himself. And yes, he DOES look like he smells. (Eliza Bennet, I often thought that Brad Pitt looked like he smelled back in the day, too.)

    HBC’s look is getting old. Yeah, it’s quirky and fun and goofy, but it’s all starting to look the same. Poofy tea-length skirt with tons of tulle stapled on and wacky stripes and colors. Yawn. Give me a wacky slinky number for a change, HBC. At least SWINTON mixes things up and keeps us on our toes.

    Eva Green has been giving the same smirky stink-eye on red carpets for as long as I can remember, and I love her for it. The blue velvet dress looks great on her.

    And Michelle Pfieffer is BEAUTIFUL and needs to be out places more often, reminding everyone of how gorgeous and talented she is. I love her. And that red color looks fantastic against her skin.

  15. Amber

    I totally get you on the Johnny Depp thing. He’s attractive, at the core, but there is so much grease and stink and smug..ugh. Just doesn’t do much for me. And he comes off as such an ass in interviews. But mostly, he just needs a shower and some clean clothes.
    I also agree that he’s a terrific actor, but this schtick of appearing in every Tim Burton film ever made is getting old. Same goes for HBC, but at least she’s married to the man.
    Michelle’s face looks the same as it did in Grease 2. How??

    • Eliza Bennett

      Amber, I just cackled. Johnny Depp’s new must-sniff fragrance for men, “grease and stink and smug”!

    • Kit

      In the last 5 years, he’s done Pirates, The Tourist, Rum Diary and Public Enemies
      and in that time he’s also done three Tim Burton movies. He’s done more non-Tim Burton – not.

      Over the course of 25 years, he’s done something like 7 Tim Burton movies and I don’t know – THIRTY other things, so I hardly think this is some “schtick” that he never varies from. They’re friends. They like working together. When he works with Tim he gets to do a little writing and character development which I’m sure is fun for him, so good for him.

      • Jessica

        I think part of the problem is that the Burton movies get a LOT more attention, AND that Jack Sparrow feels like a Burton-esque creation — cut from the same cloth — so it feels like that’s all he does. Rum Diary and the Tourist were TERRIBLE and made no money. He could benefit from something really different that was a huge hit — I thought he was great in Finding Neverland, but that was ages ago, and it feels totally out of his wheelhouse now.

  16. Chasmosaur

    I used to love Johnny Depp, but he always looks greasy now. While I think Brad Pitt’s scruffy look is about “!@#$%^& the Entertainment Media”, I don’t know what to think of Depp. And I feel like Vanity Fair is legally obligated to have an interview with him every year now. Enough.

    As for Michelle Pfeiffer and her skin, I think part of it is you never saw that woman overly tan. Good skin care starts with not abusing your skin. And where she appears to have had plastic surgery (people say lips and nose – it could be good makeup and lighting, not sure), she appears to have made sure that it looks as natural as possible.

  17. kathotdog

    While Johnny Depp picked up accessories at Express for the premiere, he also picked out Alison Lohman’s outfit?

    I love Johnny Depp, though he has gotten a bit samey in recent movies. However, did you see him on “Life’s Too Short?” He was so wonderfully uncomfortable. Then again, it could just be Ricky Gervais genius as he gets such great comedic performances out of so many people. Now I want to watch “Extras,” again.

  18. Chasmosaur

    Oh, and as for HBC?

    I read somewhere that she initially was planning to NOT be in Dark Shadows, but I think she ended up liking the role and changed her mind. She’s in Les Miserables coming up, so more non-Burtonian acting coming from her soon.

    And I frequently think her fashion sense was formed as a rebellion against the series of period pieces she did when she first came on the scene. It should also be noted at British events, she tends to be more streamlined – sometimes I think she sees the fully-cracked-out outfits as her “Hollywood” look.

    I personally love that she frequently carries the same purse – it’s so damn normal. (Best pic is here – http://gofugyourself.com/helena_bonham_carter-ly_played-10-2010)

  19. Kiki

    Eva Green said something in French Vogue I think about how she likes to wear jeans and sneakers and no makeup in her daily life, then get really dressed up for events…I remember thinking Ahah! We have an explanation.

  20. Kara

    Co-sign on Johnny Depp. He’s never done anything for me; I think he’s weird-looking, and nowadays he often looks unwashed.

    Michelle Pfeiffer looks great, although I want to tug her red dress up an inch.

  21. Heironyms.

    Object lesson: If you’re going to do a deep, dramatic side part, make darn sure your roots are touched up.

    Nothing sabotages the Bringing It like a visible quarter inch of what–light brown? auburn?–under all that carefully-cultivated, raven-tressed vampishness.

    • Scanderoon

      Yeah, the light roots make it look like her hair is thinning around the part, which is kinda creepy with that whole look.

  22. Bella

    Love that blue velvet on Eva Green, but what’s with the part in her hair? Is she not a natural brunette?

    HBC and JD seem to be in a time warp. Such a good looking man, but he does everything he can to look like a mentally deficient homeless man who just raided the Salvation Army clothing store. Maybe next time he can pick up some shampoo.

  23. Sandra

    Johnny would be so much better off with a shower, shave, hair-cut, and Burton-ectomy. It was fun for most of the ride, but we’re way past our station by now. The movie that totally sold me on Depp was Donnie Brasco. He can bring it, but he needs to take a break from the ‘quirky’. It looks a little silly on him now. Maybe he and Helena can go to a career-support group together. They don’t have to give up Tim in their personal lives, but they really should switch it up professionally.

    Eva is lovely and the blue velvet is killer. The grey thing, however, shows every bit of what little underwear she has on. Not good. Not that I really care about her unmentionables, just that they should be unNOTICEable as well.

  24. Mae

    FYI – HBC will be coming out in the movie musical version of Les Miserables in December! Also, I agree about JD. Meh. Never got it.

  25. Dawn

    doesn’t Johnny have someone on his staff who can polish those boots?

  26. Faye

    I thought I was the only person for whom Johnny Depp does nothing. He’s always seemed greasy, smug, unattractive, and not even all that talented to me. I’m not alone!

    I love Eva Green. For some reason, her dramatic looks and pouts always make me smile.

    HBC – see, people always say, “Oh, she just does her own thing and she doesn’t care what people thing– but , when you dress in a such an outrageous, bizzarely over-the-top fashion that is guaranteed to get you attention, can you really say that you don’t care about what people think? To me, dressing all “look at me” does not compute with *not* caring what people say. I don’t know. She is very talented, though.

    Also, I need the number of Michele Pfeiffer’s dermatologist. And that guy needs to stay in business for the next 20 years or so, minimum.

  27. Miss Catherine

    I feel you on the Depp angle. But, I do love me some Burton and some HBC, so, I have to just encourage them all to do their thing as they will. I want Johnny Depp to be adopted by them and move in, except to a third house connected to their other two houses, and they can all meet for very unkempt breakfasts in a communal nook and discuss accessories and expensive hair care products that produce an immediate look of dishevelment and/or homelessness.

    I love the theory on HBC’s style, btw, Chasmosaur.

    Bella’s shoes with the churchy outfit I think I love. Eva should have borrowed them. And maybe done her roots. The hard part with regrowth works less well with going to a darker color than gals who lighten. Or is that just me? Maybe it’s a personal taste thing. But, totally on board with Eva and how it has clearly been broughten.

    • Katharine

      Well, the thing with dark roots on light hair is it DOES happen naturally. Not near so often as unnaturally, but still — if you’re one of those medium brownish blondes whose hair gets lighter in the summer, and you live at the beach, you will have dark roots in January. Light roots on dark hair will never be found on the natural human head, and only on occasional animals with paler undercoats, you know?

  28. Liz985

    Random thoughts:
    1. I’ve come to terms with the whole HBC thing, but what struck me with these pics was that is has become soooo unoriginal now. I swear she wears the same dress to every event — they’re just made out of different fabrics. But, essentially still same style with the same hair and makeup. Snooooze.
    2. Ditto for Mr. Depp. Same thing, every single time. No longer “original” in that offbeat way. Just predictable and boring.
    3. I feel about velvet the same way some feel about sequins. Love it just about no matter what. So, the blue velvet dress (minus the ugly shoes) — lovely, lovely.
    4. Michelle Pheiffer — glad to see her out and about. Love her dresses, too. Both seem very apt for the occasion. The first reminds me of something “Lily Munster” might have worn – vaguely reminiscent of the lining of, well this is gross, but a coffin. The second, as you said, blood red. Spot on for team Pheiffer.

  29. Kit

    Helena Bonham Carter
    I think she’s worn this dress before. Perhaps to the Oscars or some such a couple of years ago, and I think with mis-coloured shoes and hose. If not, another time though.

    Johnny Depp
    I love and adore him – or at least, his persona in interviews and even the occasional tourist video (I watch ‘em all and I ain’t askeered to say it!); but I HATE his sartorial choices ‘cuz LAWD he always looks dirty or derivative, or both. Bleh.

    Eva Green
    I have long and long had a lady crush on Ms. Green – seriously – French accent, those eyes with that hair, and S-M-O-U-L-D-E-R-I=N-G. Wowzers. In my dreams I am that hot.

    • Kristin

      Yes! HBC *has* worn this dress before (and I thought I saw it on this site; must now go back and look). If it wasn’t her, someone did, because when I saw it, I knew it was familiar. Who else would be batty enough to wear it?

  30. Stubenville

    Florence Welch’s dress at the Met Ball would have been successful (for me at least) if it had the toned down proportions of Bella’s dress in this photo spread. And I agree that the froufrou at the top of the dress added nothing for Bella.

  31. Kristin

    I thought HBC had worn this dress before? Could’ve sworn it. If she didn’t, someone else did because it looks really familiar. I just went back to look at some of what she’s worn (didn’t go through the 41 picture gallery because I really should at least *pretend* to work today) and I think it’s so familiar looking because she’s worn a dozen dresses that look just like it – just in a separate pattern. She really needs to try something different. Less crazy would be nice too.

  32. Wordphreak

    Johnny Depp: so over. Eva Green: ick.

  33. Kathleen Trail

    So did anyone notice HBC practically launching herself over the barrier in the background of the second Eva Green picture (the first blue velvet one)? I do love the fact that she is probably planting a blood-red lipstick print on some Harry Potter fan’s cheek who was standing three people deep back in that crowd.

    If only Lucy Honeychurch could see you now….

  34. Jill

    After reading about J Depp in Vanity Fair, I think Johnny is an out of touch, over paid, rich douche bag. Seriously – read the article and it will change any positive opinion you have of him.

  35. Sonya

    Eva Green is gorgeous, she makes me want to dye my hair black and go all goth.

  36. Lynne

    Johnny’s not turning into Tim Burton. He’s turning into Mickey Rourke. Tragic.

    I want to agree with y’all about Eva Green but from the second I saw her in whatever James Bond movie she was in, I’ve had an irrational hate on for this girl. Couldn’t tell you why. Just can’t stand her. So this evil queen schtick she’s got going on just annoys me further.

    You know, every time I see a Vivienne Westwood design, I think, “Who is this for? Who wears this stuff?” Oh yeah. Helena wears this stuff. She looks like she was made in a lab for it. Good for her for having a personality.

  37. Tracey

    Can’t agree with you on the Eva Green comments. First gown was dramatic but blech, and while the second gown was lovely, I don’t think she was working it. She had a look on her face that made me want to smack her, and I’m not a violent person…

    Johnny has his moments… this isn’t one of them. And hands off HBC! She’s awesome even when looking like she came out of a dumpster. She’d love that comparison, I’m sure!

  38. Jen

    I just had lunch with my college-freshman son, who is as greasy and wispy-whiskered as Depp. The difference is, son is in the middle of finals and stressed out and has a whiff of “I’ll return to normal hygiene soon” about him. Depp is famous, and does not.

    Some of Depp’s clothing choices are at times interesting but… I do not get the hair.

  39. TonyG

    I like Johnny Depp (seems down to earth, sensitive/simpatico, not phased by Hollywood), and I am definitely going to see Dark Shadows, but I do agree that he and Tim Burton should do things separately for awhile. His black and white get-up (except for the shoes) suits him better than the all black suit even as the latter may be more fashion worthy.

  40. regina

    Eva Green is my girl crush and can do no wrong. That is all.

  41. Liz

    Did Allison Lohman think she was going to the mall instead of a movie premiere?!?

  42. Jo

    My first thought on seeing the posters was ‘oh dear, another Depp-Burton movie’.

    Also, dear Lord. Eva’s lips (or lips’ makeup) are a picture of perfection. And I want that velvet dress.

  43. vandalfan

    HBC’s red carpet style and Depp’s aura are both one-note, but I love the note. I hope Eva Green’s performance in Dark Shadows can change my opinion of her less than stellar acting skills that I gathered after the Jame’s Bond fiasco.

  44. Sandra

    One thing that is mightily in Mr. Depp’s favor is his treatment of children. After his little girl was treated at Great Ormond Street Children’s Hospital, he returned in full Captain Jack regalia to entertain the sick kiddies.

    • Claire L1

      I’m with you Sandra….. A good guy can get away with so much more ( in my book) than a guy who is just hot.

  45. Lilibet

    I particularly didn’t get the fuss over Depp as Jack Sparrow. He was so cringe-worthy embarrassing I couldn’t watch any more. And he failed to find the manic lunacy in Fear and Loathing although he did look better in the Hawaiian shirts than he does in this get-up.

    Interesting about Brad Pitt being more adventurous in his roles. I don’t get him either but would be more willing to watch one of his later films than any of Depp’s.

  46. Molly

    Johnny Depp looks like the slightly younger version of post op Mickey Rourke. Shame :) He used to be such a lovely one.

  47. Ms.A

    Well that an assault of fugly. However, Eva Green served it fiercely. She’s making me love that blue velvet dress.

  48. JanetP

    I have multiple points to make.

    1. Heather, I thought you and I were soulmates but if you’re not on board the Johnny Hotness Train, you are obviously delusional.
    2. HBC’s lipstick is gorgeous.
    3. As is Michelle Pfeiffer.
    4. Bella Heathcote in white looks like she stepped right out of Willy Wonka. Even her name would fit right in.
    5. But her strappy heels totally rock.
    6. When I hear “Eva Green” I think “Eva Mendez” and am always surprised. Not the same person.
    7. Okay, maybe I never really thought we were soulmates, but still, Heather, the Johnny Hotness Train awaits, and the view is fine.

  49. Lindy

    Johnny Depp has DANDRUFF all over his shoulders in that pic. So, not very heartthrob-y.

  50. gryt

    I adore Johnny Depp, always have, and—I imagine—always will. Coolness ages well; ask Paul Newman.

  51. gryt

    PS. And I dig those funky looks he wears.

  52. Improbable Joe

    Johnny Depp and Eva Green are sort of twins… objectively attractive, not so much in practice. If you punched their physical measurements into a computer, they’d be perfect people. On the red carpet, they wear weird clothing, makeup, facial expressions, and odd posture, and ruin their natural beauty with lots of poo-riffic behavior.

  53. mrbruno

    Michelle Pfeiffer is a beauty and always comes off as a class act!!! HBC is so quirky and fun!!! Johnny Depp, however, is too hip to be happy… I mean, really dude, you’re way too cool act is a bloody bore and besides it looks like you need an hour in a hot bubble bath!!!

  54. crystal

    Call me crazy–it’s okay, I am a little–but I want to see HBC’s dress without all the goofy styling. It looks like it could be fun, at a less awkward length and toned down just a tad.

  55. beth c.

    I am disappointed at Johnny’s styling here. WTF with the bob haircut?? who told him THAT was a good idea? All of it: unanimously vetoed.

    And I really am over him and Burton. Someone pointed out that JD has done only a handful of Burton films in his whole career… but the thing is, even many of his non-Burton films feel like Burton. AND there were like 18 of the Pirates movies/sequels/video games/Disney rides, so technically, that amplified the Burton feel. ALSO since JD/Burton/HBC are all practically the same person, anything ONE of them does feels like all the others, case in point HBC in Harry Potter and Big Fish (cute movie, her in the SAME role) (AND imdb just showed me that Burton directed Big Fish, so it’s all just one big incestuous cluster-fk) or Burton doing Corpse Bride. JD was in the Imaginarium of Dr whatever… same kooky genre. Even movies with none of them in it, like Nanny McPhee, seem to channel “their” essence.

    Re: Eva, she looks gorg, but I’m not feeling the boob cups on the blue velvet dress. That seems like a sophomoric designer mistake, and not flattering for a grown woman. Why intentionally do that?

    Michelle looks sensational. Period.

  56. Scanderoon

    I have never understood the attraction to Johnny Depp. So he was a good-looking kid. I no longer think he is good looking, and find most of his recent work puzzling-to-awful. And then when I see him like this at premieres, I am repulsed.

  57. Lilyka

    You know what? If you don’t see a picture of Johnny and immediately feel your heart skip a beat at his beauty, i think that’s just the way you’re made and there ain’t nothing you can do about it. Me, i hold my hand over the part of the picture where he has greasy smelly hair, and just stare at his beautiful, soulful eyes and perfect smirking lips. Which i’m sure would embarrass him no end, but then again by now he’s probably gotten used to it.

  58. jbeth

    No Depp love for you, huh? To each her own. My confession is that I cannot find a place on the Ryan Gosling train. *ducks*

    • Softwear

      Ever seen one of his movies? I always feel like I shouldn’t find him attractive. And then I see him in a movie….

  59. Erin

    I love the entire cast of this movie. HBC can wear whatever she wants, she is crazy and beautiful and it does not change the fact that she really can act.
    Johnny Depp needs to lose the stringy hair and stupid tinted glasses. Bono and Pitt have been carrying it on for way too long. Its tired.
    Eva Greene was great in the movie. She has a cool edge.
    Chloe Moretz is going to be a stunning woman, and she already has quite a bit of style. Michelle Pfieffer is just timeless – love her!

  60. Emma

    I, too, saw Johnny on Kimmel. He seems very nice. Jimmy was asking him about all the weird characters he plays and Johnny said something like “it’s my job as actor to take risks and not do the same thing all the time” (or words to that effect). And I thought, but now you DO the same thing ALL the time: you dress up as cartoon characters in mostly Tim Burton films. That’s not what most great actors would call acting. Snap out of it.
    I don’t think I will ever tire of HBC’s outfits. It’s exactly what I would wear if I was tiny and beautiful and famous and went to places other than Kroger and the library. I, however, would NOT marry Tim Burton. Eeeeww.

  61. Sophie

    Tim Burton and Johnny Depp need to take a break from each other. The last thing that they made together that I liked was Corpse Bride. Since then it’s been Wonka, Mad Hatter, Sweeney Todd, and now – ugh.

    I agree about HBC. She was so lovely in The King’s Speech. It made me miss all those period films she used to do.

  62. Softwear

    Johnny Depp is sexy BECAUSE of his talent. Is he sexy on his own merit beyond that? Mmm…a little bit. A little bit friends.

    What does it say about Alison that relative newcomer Bella looks like a PRO (not in the sexual way folks) and completely composed and self-assured whereas she, Alison, looks she got stood up on a date at the local pizza parlour. On a sitcom. In 1994.

  63. MelissaW

    Eva Green could and SHOULD give smize-ing lessons on ANTM. She has the eyes – she can wear absolute crap but her eyes are always good.

  64. CJ

    Johnny Depp not aging well? He may style himself in an unflattering way, but the man looks like he hasn’t aged a day since Cry Baby. And when he cleans up, he looks beautiful. (Finding Neverland anyone?) Personally, I think his style evolved partially from not wanting to play the game of being a Hollywood hunk…the guy seems hell-bent on killing the hot…hence the greasy hair, hole-y hats, that black and white jacket that he looks like he borrowed from KD Lang, etc.

    Pfeiffer looks amazing. How is it possible that she looks so good?

    I have seen Casino Royale at least a dozen times and thought Eva Green was an awesome Bond woman, far more depth than the usual Bond Girl cheesecake. I wish we saw more of her…and I wish she didn’t try so darn hard on the red carpet! She either looks like a ghost or like she wants to suck everyone’s blood!

  65. Bethany B.

    I am not on board with the Johnny Depp crushing, either. In no small part because he always seems to dress like a hobo when he’s out in public. I also think he’s better looking when his hair is short and his face is clean shaven.

  66. Koko

    HBC – I love her and her wacky take on red carpet dressing. Everyone else seems boring compared to her.

    Depp – Molten hot. Crazy fashion sense but totally individual. I’ve stood close to him and he does not smell bad – but I wish he’d wash his hair more often. I’m assuming he has mysterious personal reasons for the way he dresses as he doesn’t seem to give a rat’s ass whether he looks good or not.

    Pfeiffer – Botox! Botox! Botox! Yes, she looks beautiful but she can barely move her mouth, let alone the rest of her face. She’s a porcelain doll.

  67. Sarah

    This is very random, but I only like Johnny as the pirate. My boyfriend makes fun of me for this all the time. It sounds so very dirty and horrible, but most of the rest of the time he looks crazy to me.

  68. mary

    I am wildly disappointed that HBC’s shoes actually match. Where’s the passion in her insanity gone to? It’s as if she just doesn’t care anymore, you know? So sad.

  69. mepe

    Michelle Pfeiffer’s new head looks amazing!!

  70. Jael Paris

    With the exception of Chocolat, I’ve never thought Depp was attractive, and I’m a big fan of his acting. To me, he has the perfect early Victorian face, thus he should always be cast as a consumptive poet. And why did it take this long for him to play a vampire? I’ve been wondering about that obvious casting for 15 years!