Fugging Fire


Okay, what do we think is going on with Jennifer Lawrence?

a) Dior is tired of everyone complaining that its stylists are giving her the dullest or worst-fitting stuff, so someone of there said, “You want EXCITEMENT? FINE. TAKE OUR DRUNK SHIRT AND SKIRT-LEG”;

b) Jennifer Lawrence regrets this Dior contract because she feels hamstrung and is sick of getting boring or ill-fitting or ugly stuff, so she’s going to start tanking this thing, requesting and wearing the absolute worst of what’s available so that Dior will cut her smart-quick and she can start wearing Prabal Gurung and whatnot again;

c) Jennifer Lawrence thinks it’s funny that everyone hates her Dior partnership and is wearing a skirt-legged pant solely to mess with the world;

d) Jennifer Lawrence actually likes this, and therefore WANTS to look like she wandered out of the student fashion show at The Upstairs 7-11 School For Sewing. Brought To You By 5-Hour Energy And Aerosol Inhalation;

e) Jennifer Lawrence just wants to make us all figure out what the hell those pants are called . Do we use a hybrid word, like “skants,” which rhymes with the askance way I am looking at them? Or are they skirt-cut pants? Is it a leg skirt, or skirt-leg? Pantagoons? Do we just give up and call them hell britches?

Either way: This was a wonderful ninth-birthday gift. And look how thrilled SHE looks about it:

Just feel the joy there. Let it wash over you and raise you up, Groban-style. And then join me in wishing FERVENTLY that we could fix (or trim) that one really long hair in her bangs that maybe was meant to sweep the other way. And then resume feeling the love tonight.

[Photos: Getty]

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Comments (71):

  1. Kat
    +25

    I just don’t get what it is she’s even wearing. What are they smoking at Dior to think this is acceptable as an outfit?

  2. Annie E
    +24

    Oh my God. What the WHAT. This makes me seriously question Raf Simons’s designing ability.

  3. Amy
    +19

    I really think they should just close Dior down immediately and banish the entire staff to some distant rock in the middle of an ocean to live out the rest of their years in shame. Also, I hope they are paying her well.

  4. Bianca
    +23

    First off, she’s gorgeous. That face and that body…wow. BUT. But. Her hair is SO bad that it’s almost distracting me from those disastrous clothes she’s wearing. By the way, I wonder how much this fugly ensemble costs. Insane.

    • Ariel
      +9

      Agreed. Whoever did the hair needs to be called in for questioning. It resembles my hair mid-shower. And I cut my own hair! Not very well, I might add. Jesus.

    • Jamie
      +30

      I KNOW. That errant strand of fringe is the least of her concerns. She looks like she recently removed a very snug beanie. I love that she cut her hair to this length (so different from all the interchangeable 20-something actresses with their long, wavy extensions), but whoever was styling her for this event clearly had no idea what to do with it.

      Also, I just never understood this partnership with Dior. I love Marion Cotillard. And I love Jennifer Lawrence. But they are not the same brand. Who looked at Jennifer Lawrence, and thought “fussy French couture”?

  5. Dazie
    +19

    WORDS.

    And WTF is it with that crazy pant leg? Was the other leg also foofy but being held down by the tinfoil stripes?

  6. Goldfish
    +32

    I think this ensemble is totally appropriate for the wait staff at a techno-themed dim sum restaurant.

    (Seriously, that top is like a throw-pillow before one removes the protective plastic wrapping material)

  7. LoriK
    +3

    Damn, that is bad. I hope the answer is B, I pray that it’s not D, I feat that it’s A.

  8.  Courtney
    +4

    This is like a half-hearted, half-finished I Dream of Jeannie costume. Not cool, Dior. Not cool.

  9.  ohsohappy
    +3

    Wha…..wha…what is it? Or perhaps, WHY is it? I just don’t know.

  10. ErinB
    +1

    Hell britches. SNORT. Because I want to sleep at night, I’m going to hope for choice b.

  11. Cat
    0

    Um, hmmm. This is… oh hell, what is this?! I kind of love this first picture, but this is seriously a mess.

  12. Sandra
    +30

    Wouldn’t it be cool if Zombie Christian Dior came back these 60+ years after death and let the people putting this crap out under his name know exactly how he feels about that?

    • HelenBackAgain
      +5

      That should be a short film. And I would wait in line overnight to see it.

  13. Linda
    +3

    Why can’t she pick something better from the Dior line? Does the contract stipulate that she wear whatever Sharon Stone crazy outfit they pick?

    She looks sad in the second pic. I think she may be regretting the hair cut. Every time I see her it’s different, and this flat ironed to heck and back does not do her any favors. She’s so gorgeous.

    Or maybe she’s missing her “not” boyfriend BCoop. When they were doing press for Silver Linings Playbook, her face lit up like Christmas morning every time she was around him.

  14. Kristan
    +2

    Is it just me or do the pants look bullfighter-inspired? That almost makes me not hate them. And SHE looks kind of fab in the first pic. (Although her hair is a bit… sullen, at least compared to normal.)

    • C-No
      0

      That’s what I thought, too! Which would never work for a normal human, but the stars, they are in fact not just like us.

  15. HelenBackAgain
    +13

    The shirt does look drunk. Actually, it looks STILL drunk, as if it went out without her last night and only just sneaked back in, just in time to be worn, and it’s hoping no one will notice what a mess it is.

    • HelenBackAgain
      +2

      Oh, also, I like the choppy long bob on her, but she seems to be having trouble with how to wear it. I think that’s the problem, not the cut itself.

      Which does mean you just have to let it grow out anyway, when that happens. So I guess effectively it isn’t much of a difference. Unless maybe someone can style it in a way with which she’s comfortable!

  16. cass
    +1

    so funny

  17. EngProf
    +3

    The pumps look good on her.

  18. Megan
    +4

    I started laughing at pantagoons, but hell britches caused me to double snort!

  19. AnnieB
    +9

    First off I absolutely love her. She has such a refreshing B.S. free personality and its almost charming that she is incapable to style her hair. But the Dior thing looks like an epic fail from a 1970′s Home Ec class.

  20.  Stefanie
    +3

    Im going with b. Aside from her Oscar gown, most of the Dior she has been given has been less than stellar. Those pants are insane.

  21. Sarah B
    +5

    On the plus side, her face looks tremendous in those sunglasses.

  22. Lizzy
    +2

    Pants with an identity crisis – they think they’re a skirt?

    •  Katharine
      +2

      Instead of this unholy combination of gaucho pants meeting palazzo pants, wouldn’t this look better if it was a skirt, albeit an asymmetric one? I looked this up on Style.com, and the model on the runway is working it so you don’t immediately recognise the nature of the “hell britches”.

  23. Sajorina
    +5

    “I’ll take ‘She doesn’t give a fuck’ for 1200, Alex”!

    I actually like the cropped top and the left leg of the pants hybrid! I just wish the right leg matched the left one because she’s working it! I love her so much… I’m FABbing the hell out of the left side of the outfit, but overall, I think she looks BEAUTIFUL!

    • Tiffany
      +2

      I agree! :D

      • ericajeanine
        0

        Yeah, everyone keeps screaming about what Dior is doing to her, but I’m sure she has final say as to which Dior outfits she wears, so I’m assuming all the stuff we she her in, she is giving the thumbs up to.

  24. Melissa
    +5

    Amazing: “The Upstairs 7-11 School For Sewing”

  25. gayle
    +3

    I have concerns that she will be in Dior for the September Vogue it is going to continue this pattern of unfortunate outfits

  26. Fawn
    +10

    I know it’s crazy, but I actually have a bigger problem with that hideous lace crop-top than with the hell britches. (Please note, this is not an endorsement of hell britches.)

  27. Garbo
    +7

    Scullottes? Cullants? Caprirts?

    • Dazie
      +29

      Chi-NOS

      • Linda
        +5

        Can I use that? My 45 year old boss thinks he’s an 18 year old Abercrombie & Fitch model and wears the most inappropriate outfits.

        Yes a 45 year old man is wearing outfits, and I have to look at them.

  28. kelli
    +1

    I think she lost a bet.

  29. Janice
    +8

    Throw on a bit brighter colour and/or tie dye, and you could find this outfit for sale at our local folk festival, between the bong stand and the felafel hut.

  30. Tiffany
    +3

    I like the idea of doing something interesting with pants. I even dig the stripes on the blouse and pants. This is just so far out there that it looks silly. If they had some loose drape to them and matched in style, I might like them.

  31. Betsy
    +3

    Yes thank you! The first thing I thought when I saw this was FUG GIRLS!! Pantagoons for the win! She needs out of that contract now. Other than the Oscar dress, it hasn’t served her well at all. She needs more young and fresh things, and this is just wacky.

  32. Amy
    +7

    Cinna would NEVER have allowed her out in this wreck! Save that for some fashion challenged district!

  33. Becky
    +3

    Seems like someone also decided to have some fun with the colorful duct tape section.

    But, I will say that the errant bang strand happens to me all the time. I feel her pain there.

  34. Art Eclectic
    +1

    I actually like the top. The bottom, however, looks like pure Stella…and not in a good way.

  35. Edith
    +11

    Hell Britches. Because “hell britches” – the term – needs to be a thing, even as “hell britches” – the pants – need to NEVER be a thing.

    • Emily Rang
      +3

      I honestly may start using hell britches in everyday life. It makes me so happy. Again, the word, not those horrid things on her legs.

  36. Cynthia W
    +3

    Seriously, I made better clothes for my Barbies using nothing but a cloth napkin and some safety pins when I was EIGHT. And the hair is awful – the super aggressive flat-ironing makes it look limp and greasy.

    Whoever is designing this crap at Dior needs to be fired and forbidden from ever designing again.

  37. Claire1
    +4

    The pants kind of remind me of those half groom/half bride Halloween costumes….but with a trailer park fabulous twist.

  38. themis
    0

    I’m pretty sure this occurred in Paris. In Paris, I imagine it’s a thousand times better to skew on the odd side side of exceptional than to be at all boring. I just look at at that and think – she wouldn’t wear that here, but over there, I am not mad at it.

  39. Nora
    +2

    Please tell me I’m not the only person who saw this and immediately thought of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2h4ib-CXTjA (start watching around 1:50 for the best view of the skirt/pant combo). Maybe the folks at Dior just want to educate the public about the late, lamented Passions?

  40. Rina
    0

    Okay, is this what she actually wore ‘around’ or is it a still from an outdoor fashion editorial shoot? Because the latter could be forgiveable.

  41. mojo
    0

    Skants. Definitely skants.

    And it’s C. She’s just messin’ wit y’all.

  42. Amberoni13
    +2

    MILEY. And a second dose, because nobody else mentioned it yet, but MILEY freaking CYRUS. How has no one else noticed that Miley’s half sweats/half jeans are, at least, the Godparent of these hell britches?!?!

    • HelenBackAgain
      0

      Ohhhhh nooooo… we’re not about to see a cavalcade of pants with legs that don’t match, are we? ARE WE?!? Is this a thing now?

      I feel a bit vapory and as if I need a drink at that thought, and it’s only just past noon here…

  43. Squirrel!
    +5

    That top is a fiberglass lampshade.

  44. stephasaurus
    +3

    some old woman who lived through the great depression and hoards wayward remnants of fabric must have hobbled herself one last time to the sewing machine at dior and put this together before keeling over, eyes blinded by cataracts and spite… and her dying wish must have been for this hideous beast of an outfit to see the light of day.

  45. Guerra
    0

    This should send her to fug, it’s that bad!

    I really hate her hair, the cut, the colour, the styling. It does nothing fo her!

  46. nicole
    0

    pukesville, population JLaw.
    really, she loves GFY so much, she put this on for you.

  47. Whiterabbit11
    +3

    That outfit is hideous & Jennifer is so beautiful, so toned, so young, to detract from her beauty is actually a skill. I’m impressed by their ability to make such an attractive woman look like hell, consistently, in the biggest year of her life. Nothing about Jennifer’s fresh, wholesome look and robust personality suggest prissy French couture would be a good fit for her, literally or figuratively. I’m actually cranky about this. Urgh.

  48. horsefeathery
    +3

    did stella mccartney start working for dior???

  49. glamourdon't
    0

    Did anyone else get a Kate Winslet vibe from the first shot. Not the clothes (please God no) but the facial expression…..

  50. Lily1214
    0

    No, no, no. Looks like she pulled two different pieces from two different outfits and then put them on and went out.

  51. Dee
    0

    For someone who always said that she would never sell out…she pretty much did. In the most embarrassing of ways. Hideous.

  52. Kim
    0

    Watching Dior try to turn Jennifer Lawrence into a Meth-head Barbie makes me sad. Why did she agree to do this in the first place? Because she once heard of Dior and all the other famous people seem to like it? So confused. Right now, she should be promoting Catching Fire. Which means she needs to look like Katniss. Brown hair, dummy. And clothes that don’t look like a cotton candy machine exploded on you. Wtf? Who is handling her?

  53. Ellen Cox
    0

    Glad you addressed this. It is also covered in this piece on hybrid fashion: http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/fashion/8884059/Hybrid-fashion-would-you-wear-it. I think the most horrific is the Frankenshoe: Ugg/Crocs/Vibram-toe-shoe combo. :S

  54. Jules
    +1

    @Kim: Promotion for Catching Fire doesn’t begin until late October, early November so…why should her hair be brunette now???. Filming for Catching Fire ended back in March or April which is when filming for American Hustle began, then X-Men…hence the blond hair color (which of course is her natural color anyway). Filming for Mockingjay begins in September and that’s when Jennifer Lawrence’s hair will be brunette again. Promoting The Hunger Games: Catching Fire does not dictate that her hair should be brunette…filming it does; see the entire promotional tour for The Hunger Games…blond from begining to end. Oh, by the way, you wonder who is handling her???…the same team that guided her to an incredible career, two Oscar nominations (her first win), critical acclaim, a successful franchise, a Dior campaign, and films through 2018. I think everyone involved is doing just fine.

    Besides, Lawrence wasn’t in Paris to promote anything but Dior. Anyway, as far as the outfit is concerned, it’s high fashion and I thought she pulled it off….she looks gorgeous. There have been some Dior that she has worn that I have loved and some that I’ve only appreciated but, Jennifer Lawrence has a beautiful face and figure and a shitload of confidence (that’s what I always see, anyway) so, I guess it just doesn’t bother me at all.

  55. ashley
    0

    When i saw it on CB Celebitchy they ass kissed and Kaiser or CB over there said they loved it and it was refreshing on her

    to which AT WORK in my cubicle i SCREAMED WTFFFFFF

    that outfit looks like something i wore in 2000 when stupid fabric and lame colors were cool for tweens and young teenagers.

    #GODAWFUL