Okay, what do we think is going on with Jennifer Lawrence?
a) Dior is tired of everyone complaining that its stylists are giving her the dullest or worst-fitting stuff, so someone over there said, “You want EXCITEMENT? FINE. TAKE OUR DRUNK SHIRT AND SKIRT-LEG”;
b) Jennifer Lawrence regrets this Dior contract because she feels hamstrung and is sick of getting boring or ill-fitting or ugly stuff, so she’s going to start tanking this thing, requesting and wearing the absolute worst of what’s available so that Dior will cut her smart-quick and she can start wearing Prabal Gurung and whatnot again;
c) Jennifer Lawrence thinks it’s funny that everyone hates her Dior partnership and is wearing a skirt-legged pant solely to mess with the world;
d) Jennifer Lawrence actually likes this, and therefore WANTS to look like she wandered out of the student fashion show at The Upstairs 7-11 School For Sewing. Brought To You By 5-Hour Energy And Aerosol Inhalation;
e) Jennifer Lawrence just wants to make us all figure out what the hell those pants are called . Do we use a hybrid word, like “skants,” which rhymes with the askance way I am looking at them? Or are they skirt-cut pants? Is it a leg skirt, or skirt-leg? Pantagoons? Do we just give up and call them hell britches?
Either way: This was a wonderful ninth-birthday gift. And look how thrilled SHE looks about it:
Just feel the joy there. Let it wash over you and raise you up, Groban-style. And then join me in wishing FERVENTLY that we could fix (or trim) that one really long hair in her bangs that maybe was meant to sweep the other way. And then resume feeling the love tonight.