Fug Madness 2013, Sweet Sixteen: Bjork Bracket, Part I


 

(6) LINDSAY LOHAN vs.  (10) LENA DUNHAM

First of all, may I remind you that these woman are the same age? Lena has her professional shit together; Lilo has a job on Anger Management solely because Charlie Sheen has been trying to save her. When CHARLIE SHEEN looks at you and is all, “girl, you are SCREWED UP,” you know things have gone awry.  (For what it’s worth, I think Charlie sees a lot of himself in Lindsay and therefore is the only person in Hollywood who still wants to help her. I think he has a lot of empathy for her without having the wherewithal to realize that she doesn’t want to help herself. That being said, the only reason Charlie Sheen himself had a career for so long is because even when he was insanely cracked up, he showed up to work on time and did his job, which Lindz hasn’t done since she was a pre-teen.) Lena needs a new stylist who will say things like, “I think we need to get a tailor in here to make some tweaks to that bodice,” or “let’s try something more structured.” Lindsay needs a time machine to redo all her choices of the last ten years. I don’t know which will emerge victorious from this battle, but I do know which one I’d rather be stuck with in a stalled elevator.

Archives: Lilo, LeDu

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Comments (90):

  1. China
    0

    Every time I see that pic of Lindsay in the jean “shorts,” I think it’s Axl Rose. EVERY TIME.

    • Anne B
      0

      I think those bottoms she’s wearing are less what we would call “shorts”, and more like “what’s left of her career”.

  2. Annie
    0

    The green dress with the pink shoe that Lena Dunham is wearing reminds me of something Sailor Jupiter might wear at a formal event.

    I voted for Lohan though. No, just no.

  3. Colleen
    0

    You lucked out, Lena. You can do sooo much better, but you’re nowhere near as bad as Lohan.

  4. greatwhitenorthchick
    0

    Actually, I prefer LiLo’s wardrobe to Lena’s. While I’m glad Lena embraces her body as it is….there’s gotta be a more flattering way to dress it.

  5. jen310
    0

    Another tough match-up of whose fug offends more. I had to go with Lena. Yeah, she’s got her shit together professionally therefore she should have shit together sartorially. There is nothing worse than having success on only one level when you can have it on all levels. She CAN and SHOULD have it on all levels. I am not a fan of hers but she just needs to have all her shit together.

    LiLo doesn’t want help and doesn’t even think she needs help. I CAN”T with her. She is tragic delusional fug at its highest form even without the clothes. For me, she is too far gone at this point and there is no turning back for her. I cannot vote for her win. Besides, if she does take the Fug Madness crown I fear she will sue the Fug Girls and all of Fug Nation and no one needs that.

    • Sajorina
      0

      Oh, please! Lena doesn’t care about what she looks like, obviously, she just wants to be recognized for her work! But, Lindsay does care, which is what makes her FUG tragic! And, RELAX, she doesn’t even know we exist!

      • Jessica
        0

        Please don’t tell other posters to relax. Thanks!

        • Sajorina
          0

          Fine, but I think it’s preposterous to think that if Lindsay wins, she’s going to sue us all!

          • Elizabeth
            0

            Tee hee! I find the idea that Lindsay will sue GFY to be funny, and also not that far removed from the truth! At least we can be assured that Fug Nation will be better dressed for the court date.

            • jen310
              0

              Yeah, it was a joke. Although, I wouldn’t put it past LiLo to sue if she does take the whole Fug Madness shebang. And Elizabeth, you’re right, Fug Nations would rock the hell out of our style for the court proceedings compared to LiLo.

            • CranAppleSnapple
              0

              She actually has sued many people, she just doesn’t win because of the frivolous eyerolling factor. :)

              • ChristieLea
                0

                Considering she tried to sue eTrade because they used the name “Lindsay” in one of their ads…yeah, I wouldn’t put it past her to attempt a lawsuit on GFY if she wins Fug Madness.

                That’s why I have little sympathy for Lilo. Sure, she has substance abuse issues…but her entitled behaviour and general spoiled-brat jerkery? It seems like that would exist, abuse issues or no.

      • Charlotte
        0

        Lena may not care what she looks like, but as someone working in the entertainment business, she should know that others care, and judge her accordingly. Dressing appropriately for events is in the job description. If she wants to be recognized for her work…well, looking good is part of said work.

      • Aj
        0

        Lena very self-consciously doesn’t care about her look. Its a pose. Makes it an easy vote for me, especially because neither her face nor her body are that difficult to make look great.

        Every picture of Lindsay is just sad. I can’t pile on someone whose laundry list of problems are so much bigger than bad taste.

    • CranAppleSnapple
      0

      Absolutely agree, Jen310!

  6. Sajorina
    0

    Lena set the bar low, so she can only go up, but Lindsay had a bar set high and she has only gone down!

  7. pantsonfire
    0

    Hmm. Well, I have to disagree on the pixie on Dunham. Not a fan (though I do like the pixie on some people, just not her, Cyrus, or Watson). Not a fan of her longer hair in those pics, either, but there must be a better, more flattering style out there somewhere. To each her own. Anyway, Lohan’s looks were clearly fuglier, and easily so, for two reasons: (1) there was an air of depressing, soiled degeneration about them that is just unfugbeatable; and (2) I DO have a problem with fur. So, as awful as Dunham looked in most of her dresses, she is but a candle in the gale force winds of Hurricane Fughan.

    • Sajorina
      0

      I agree about the fur!

    • Gabi
      0

      I completely agree about Lindsay’s air of desperation – it makes EVERYTHING she wears terrible by association. Some of the items might not be that bad if they were worn by someone else? (well, not the shorts, but the pantsuit wasn’t awful). But whatever she’s done to her face, combined with years of drug/alcohol abuse have made her look so much older than she actually is. So sad.

      Lena can’t compete with that kind of fug. Also, since she has her stuff together, I believe she will eventually find a better stylist/get a grip friend to help her with her satorial problems (mainly her attachment to strapless tops – as someone who has a larger chest I can relate – but I also know my limits and therefore put them back on the hanger where they belong!)

    • Sara
      0

      I thought her hair looked really cute on the second season of Girls. It was about chin length. I think the pixie is cuter though. Her hair was longer on the first season of Girls and in her movie Tiny Furniture, and it was not pretty.

      Had to go with Lindsay for this match-up. She actually *tries* and it’s never, ever right.

      • pantsonfire
        0

        Ah, thanks for the info. I just Googled her (I don’t have HBO or Showtime or what have you, so don’t watch the show) and I think, as far as I can tell, she might look best, in my opinion, in a length just above her shoulders? But now that I’m seeing a range of photos, I have to say, I have a new appreciation for her in the pixie. It’s definitely better than some of the looks she’s worn, though I still hold out hope that there might be something better (to me, it reads a bit matronly and I just don’t know that I think it fits with her face). Anyway, I can see why people like it on her, now that I have context. But still, not my bag.

  8. gin_in_teacups
    0

    It’s not even a question. Lena Dunham never looks good, but she just seems sort of average can’t dress herself. Lilo though. Lilo is sartorially explaining her life, in that both her wardrobe and life are a total trainwreck.

  9. Kaitlyn
    0

    I went with Lena just because she’s so up-and-coming, and she blows one sartorial opportunity after the other. I mean, if you want schlumpy to be your “brand,” fine, but she’s so smart and crackling and accomplished…and she gets dressed.

    (And I just want LiLo to go away and stay away.)

  10. Stefanie
    0

    Fit can be fixed. Poor taste however, is harder. Lilo takes it.

  11. Lucasta
    0

    Lena’s clothes make me stabby, Lindsay’s entirety makes me depressed. Lena FTW, I suppose.

  12. PeggyOC
    0

    Lena’s fug actually bothers me more, because she seems to have this attitude of rebellion against the culture of size zero beauty. I applaud her for that, but yet that’s not when you slump around looking lazy and schlubby. That’s when you stick it to the Man by looking fabulous at whatever size/shape you are. THAT’S how you rebel, lazy hipster.

    • Goldfish
      0

      Thank you. “Lazy Hipster” WILL be my new vanity plate.

    • Erin
      0

      Thank you! That’s what I’ve been saying every time she opens her mouth to speak about how we just don’t like it because she’s not super skinny. No, we don’t like it because you are lazy. And all of us other women who aren’t a size 0 would rather have a champion actually look GOOD instead of like crap.

    • Mel
      0

      WORD!

    • Lucasta
      0

      YES YES YES THIS

    • Sarie
      +1

      I agree with this completely, she wants to look like she almost cares.

    • BeeDreams
      0

      PeggyOC, I might love you.

  13. jay
    0

    I actually think Lena almost goes out of her way to dress terribly/in an unflattering way so as to provoke comments about her body shape – she almost dares you to resort to putting her into a box based upon her appearance. I always feel bad for critiquing her style choices, as if I’m somehow flying in the face of feminism, and then I realise – I appreciate people with great style regardless of size and I shouldn’t feel bad for that. Size doesn’t come into it, she dresses terribly. On balance, Lena stirs me up into a frenzy of conflicted emotions, whereas Lindsay just seems kind of tragic these days, and so for that reason it haas to be Lena.

    Oh wow, that was a rant.

    • CJG
      0

      I absolutely agree.

      • LT1
        0

        Yeah, me too. It just comes off as condescending and purposeful instead of misguided.

    • lamoll
      0

      Yes! You said it, Jay, and I am inspired to agree: Lena’s smug condescension vs Lohag’s tragic desperation. That’s the essence of this battle, and for me, Lena and her phony, manufactured, entitled rebellion is far more obnoxious, repellent and fugly than Lindsey’s pathetic descent.

      • Pouncer
        0

        Lena’s smug condescension is what’s made me vote against her in every match. I just can’t, with her.

    • Charlotte
      0

      My thoughts exactly. She dresses badly on purpose, so she can criticize people who say she dresses badly. And I don’t find trolling any more enjoyable in real life than I do on the internet.

  14. Kris
    0

    Had to go Lilo. Lena Dunham’s dress sense could be fixed with a tailor and better posture. Lilo’s dress sense may need a divine intervention to save it.

  15. Kat
    0

    I’m probably in the minority here, but I much prefer the non-gallery format for the Fug Madness posts.

    • GFY Heather
      0

      We switch to galleries so that we can bring you more pictures, as things get tighter. Plus, writing the first two rounds takes a lot out of us, and we’re at the point where we’re writing the about the same outfits over and over and over and over… the slideshow format helps keep us sane, so we appreciate your patience with it.

      • Goldfish
        0

        I like it — it’s like a shotgun blast of fug. You can get over some of these fugs when taken one at a time, but that Elle Fanning shower of badness, it just really drove it all home.

      • Kat
        0

        Cool, thanks for letting me know – I only really prefer the non-gallery format because it’s quicker to scroll through and behold the fugliness.

  16. Goldfish
    0

    Lena FTW. Here’s the rub. I have not seen photographic evidence of ONE (that’s right, ONE) flattering outfit on Lena. Lohan is often cracked out, but that’s different from wearing normal, expensive, designer clothes and yet not EVER pulling them off. EVER!! Not even the one time!! (Sorry, I feel strongly about this). Lena will lose, so I must speak my truth here while I can. I really need just one Lena outfit that isn’t a potato sack. She has a non-Hollywood body type, and she needs to represent. I’m worn out after years of Lohan’s fug. Lena is bringing a winning fug had to the table this year.

    • Spacelamb
      0

      100% AGREED. I’ve never watched Girls, and until GFY I didn’t know who she was. So I was shocked to discover that Lena is the same age as Lohan, because I honestly thought she was pushing 40. Why? Her ill-fitting, shapeless, shiny clothes age her terribly. I voted for Lena because she could look good just by changing her tailor, whereas Lindsay needs six months of R&R and wheatgrass juice to look close to her best again.

  17. jean
    0

    I hate giving it to Lohan because I want her to go away and dry out, but I can’t vote for Lena. I think Lena just hasn’t figured it out yet. Sometimes I think she lacks taste, but then she wears that goregeous blue dress and the brown dress and I think she just needs time and more confidence. And Tina Fey to explain to her that funny women can also wear properly fitting clothing.

  18. jean
    +1

    I meant “properly fitted”! Sorry.

  19. COSss
    0

    I rarely comment but I have to say that this pixie cut is totally wrong for her.
    She looks sooo much better with longer hair, it elongates her round hace and make her look slimmer and well….prettier

  20. Kate
    +1

    A little off topic, but I have to put my feminist hat on vis-a-vis Charlie Sheen: if he were a woman, he would no longer have a career. Even if he does show up for work, he’s been absurdly unprofessional on numerous occasions. We as a society (and Hollywood as a distorted microcosm of our society) have so much more tolerance for what is often (revealingly) referred to as the “antics” of “bad boys” than we do for equally self-destructive behavior in women. The one exception that comes to mind is Drew Barrymore, but I’d argue that’s because she was so young when things went south that it was easy to blame it on her parents.

    On topic: Lena’s fug reigns supreme.

    • julyol1972
      0

      I so totally agree with you! I feel that that Charlie Sheen and RDJ have always been given a pass with their antics, whilst Lohan has been stamped as having a failed career, even though she’s much younger than both of them at the same drug/alcohol stage. That being said, she really needs to take a year off to dry out and get her life together. Maybe then she can have a successful comeback a la Brittney Spears.

      • Freez-N-Shine
        0

        Unfortunately, the reason for this is that RDJ and Sheen are a lot more talented than Lindsay, and definitely bring more box office dollars in (except for that time RDJ was actually in jail and could not perform). But since we are on clothes, both those guys dress better than Lindsay. Sometimes we can see sexism when other forces are at work.

        • Kate
          0

          There is definitely something to what you are saying here. I think I just loved Mean Girls so much that I can’t let go of the fact that LiLo still has at least Sheen levels of talent (if not RDJ) in there somewhere. Perhaps it’s time for me to make peace with the possibility that such is not the case.

          But I still maintain that guys behaving badly are presented as tortured/enigmatic/interesting whereas girls behaving similarly are sad/pathetic/desperate/uninteresting.

          And while Lilo is a undoubtedly a terrible dresser (and has been for some time), I am old enough (sadly) to remember both Sheen and RDJ putting together some truly heinous ensembles–especially in the bad ol’ days.

          • Freez-N-Shine
            0

            I don’t want to make an OT trip here, but I will do a turnaround. Mean Girls, right you are, but I kept remembering something else, and found it on Google. This is a quote by Meryl Streep about Lindsay when they were making that movie together:

            “She’s in command of the art form,” Streep says with high seriousness. “Whatever acting is—I don’t know what it is—she’s in command of it. I think she could do anything she puts her mind to.”

            That was right before she took her nose dive. It was great potential lost. Maybe you’re right — if she had been a man her demons might have been better tolerated. And she was awfully young when Dina tossed her to the wolves. But she has been judged maybe more harshly than a guy.

            And speaking of judging harshly, there were pictures where I got the quote, though, and she was wearing big sun hats and shizz. She still would have rocked the fug on this day. Just saying.

            • abm
              0

              Well – and I’m entering the Witness Protection Program right after I hit “Submit” – there are those who feel Ms. Streep might not be the pinnacle of talent she’s cracked up to be, either, so perhaps not the best judge of other practitioners of her art.

              • Freez-N-Shine
                0

                Man, not even good enough to critique Lindsay Lohan. I hope she won’t have to give her Oscars back…or her record number of nominations.

            • Charlotte
              0

              Meryl was probably talking about Lindsey’s turn in “Prairie Home Companion,” in which they costarred as mother and daughter, and in which Lindsey was excellent.

              There’s no doubt in my mind that Lindsey has talent. But here’s the thing about acting – or playing a musical instrument, or writing, or any other skill – talent only takes you so far. You have to be willing to put in the work. If you don’t, then your talent atrophies – which is what I’m afraid Lindsey’s has done. It’s a crying shame, because she had something special..

              As for Sheen and RDJ – while Lindsey isn’t willing to put in the work, Sheen and RDJ were, and are. That’s why they get a pass.

              • Erika
                0

                I don’t know about RDJ, but Sheen has decent parents and a supportive family. Or at least he did, once. And when you’re in a nose dive, sometimes that’s what will pull you out. Did LiLo ever have that?

                Also, Charlie was older when he started falling apart. I think that RDJ was, too. Ugh, this depresses me. She was so damned cute in the Parent Trap, and I too loved Mean Girls. It really is sad.

                • Freez-N-Shine
                  0

                  I wish Fug Nation could do an intervention on Lindsay. We bust on her, but from these posts, we clearly care about her. I don’t know how big Fug Nation is, but I do know we are fierce. Fierce and caring.

                  Of course, we will be slamming her in this competition, b/c Fug Nation also has integrity that must be maintained, and cracked out clothing shall not pass.

      • Aj
        0

        Would that she could — but I think she may be the sole support of her family.

    • Ead310
      0

      It’s more a thing of connections.Charlie Sheen and Drew Barrymore both get/got away with their antics because the names Sheen and Barrymore have been in Hollywood for generations. Not everything is about the “opression” of women

  21. maryse
    0

    i voted for lohan. i don’t think lena thinks she can do better. and like others have said, nothing she wears is really horrible it’s just either not styled right, or doesn’t fit her right. on the other hand lohan always looks horrible. plus those shorts made me wonder what she was wearing under them and that’s a place i don’t want my brain to go.

  22. mazzy
    0

    The hemline on that Liz and Dick premiere dress gets me everytime. That’s the kind of impeccable tailoring I learned in 6th grade home ec.

    Being petite and not a size 2, Lena has a tougher job than most of her peers, and I do think she’s starting to find her groove.

  23. Noel
    0

    Strapless is just terrible for Lena. She has a pear-shaped frame and bad posture, which just screams for halter tops. I don’t get it. It’s like she’s TRYING to be unfortunate-looking.

  24. Charlotte
    0

    Well, Lena looks happy, and healthy, so for me she’s the lesser of two sartorial evils.

    But I’d much rather be stuck in an elevator with Lindsey.

  25. Montréalaise
    0

    There’s nothing wrong with Lena’s clothes per se; it’s just that they either don’t fit properly or are all wrong for her body type. On someone else (fitted properly) they’d be fine. Lindsay’s choices, on the other hand….OMG. That leather and fur thing she wore at LAX still gives me nightmares.

  26. Kate
    0

    Lindsay just makes me sad, and I really want her to just… get better and go away. Move out of LA, take up gardening or knitting or something, be kind to herself, surround herself with people who care about her. She’s had her time in the spotlight, and the spotlight has not been good to her.

  27. Sophia Loren
    0

    My first reaction was that of Kate The Feminist. Thanks for saying something!

    My second reaction was mild confusion, with whom would Jessica rather be stuck in the proverbial stalled elevator?

    And the clothes? Snoooore.

  28. AMS
    0

    I’m surprised to see such a groundswell in favor of LiLo. Lena Dunham’s clothes are uniformly dull, ill-fitting, rumply and unflattering, and there’s never any styling, ever. LiLo is usually working a look, and regardless of whether it’s a *good* look, it’s at least consistently styled and she’s committed to it from head to toe.

    P.S. “Lazy hipster” is officially my new favorite expression.

  29. Jennifer
    0

    Lose the fur, Lindsey. Lose.the.fur.

  30. Vandalfan
    0

    I don’t have HBO or Showtime, and from her looks of the red carpet, i assumed Lena was a director, a writer, possibly a radio personality, or a hand model.

  31. Helen
    0

    I knew Lohan would take this, but I had to go Dunham because SADNESS.

  32. agcons
    0

    If one is going to insist on wearing ill-fitting clothing, then Dunham does a better job at wearing it. Lohan wins.

  33. Mel
    0

    I’m voting Lena because Lilo is on drugs when she makes these choices. Yes, it’s terrible, but she doesn’t have the mental capacity to realize it.

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    Thanks for the good writeup. It if truth be told was a leisure account it. Look complex to more introduced agreeable from you! However, how can we keep up a correspondence?

  35. Guerra
    0

    This was the hardest round for me!! They are both so bad!!! But I know linds will take it.

  36. Kiti
    0

    I can’t believe LiLo is winning this. Yes, she’s a hot mess. But look at Lena Dunham. LOOK AT HER. She’s uniformly awful and ALWAYS IN THE SAME WAY. She’s yawningly blah and gasp-inducingly fug AT THE SAME TIME. HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE? GIRL. Get a bra – and a mirror.

  37. Caz
    0

    Maybe it’s just the crabby old lady in me, but every time I look at Lohan in another ugly-but-probably-excessively-expensive outfit, I just think “STOP BUYING NEW CLOTHES AND PAY OFF YOUR DEBTS, YOU IRRESPONSIBLE BRAT!”
    Lena is old/sober/smart enough to know better, though I suspect she is doing it on purpose as a sort of protest. But goddammit, why do that to yourself! Therefore I vote for Lena.

    • CranAppleSnapple
      0

      Don’t worry Caz, Lindsay doesn’t pay for anything she wears. :)

  38. Ead310
    0

    People are voting for Lindsay, Bieber and Kim K just because they dislike them as human beings. Bieber and Kim deserve their spots in the elite 8 (amazing how often they both look bad) but I’m sorry- there is no sound argument behind the fact the Lindsay doesn’t dress as bad as Lena Dunham (who actually looks older?) and certainly isn’t close to the travesty of trying to be kooky/original/interestingly badly dressed and looking like a discount Gaga of Nicki Minaj.

  39. Sylvia
    0

    Lohan is wearing an ill-fitting fronterswoman leather suit. And it’s her second worse outfit. Those “shorts” are at least Elite 8 material. Lena is fug, but a lot of her stuff can be saved by a segment of “Unfug It” or a top notch tailor.

  40. CranAppleSnapple
    0

    My brackets are in such a state. I think I can ride Lilo to the finish line, though. I also have high confidence in Heidi and KimK. :D

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