“Ha ha ha! Hilarious! A pineapple! That was the creative for this shoot! Me standing here with some random-ass pineapple with pink plumage! Like it’s f’ing Paris Hilton’s house from 2005 and everything has to look like Barbie vomited on it! And like why I am I on Good Housekeeping talking about X-Men! Shouldn’t I be on Marie Claire or Glamour or something!!! Cosmo!!! Anyone! Hello! Joining a franchise! Dating a quarterback! Having it all! Oh yeah, ha ha ha, and HOLDING A F*CKING PINEAPPLE! It’s the ‘I carried a watermelon’ of 2015! SO HAPPY TO BE HERE HOLDING THIS PEPTO FRUIT!!!!”
Fugger: Olivia Munn
I find this pleasantly caftanic.
I would’ve liked a thicker bunching on the bodice so that it was solid black. I don’t mind the sleeves being filmy, but the translucence on her chest draws the eyes straight there where the glare seems to be, and away from the rest. Still, this is both a pleasantly artsy choice from her, and possessed of a dash of crazy, the likes of which you might see on an old nighttime soap. I mean, if ever there is an event at which you should be applauded for not needing a bracelet because you have turned your SLEEVES into them, it is Met night.
So, I pretty much love this, with one major exception:
And that is: I freely admit I am a total stick-in-the-mud about grown people wearing rompers. I can’t help it. She is pulling this off about as well as a human ever will, but this is not Gymboree Play & Sing, and she is not soon to be handed a mallet and asked to bang the blue key on the xylophone while they sing about hot pastries. Half the reason it even HAS to be a romper is because it’s so short that when she sits down, it’ll essentially turn into a bathing suit, and so giving it a crotch seam is semi-protective. I sincerely award her lots of cosmically meaningless points for this — I can even live with the shoes, although there MUST have been a cuter colorful option somewhere that nobody gave her — because the fabric is that tempting. All playsuits are not created equal, and this one is high on the scale. But. It’s still a playsuit. On an adult.
Am I crazy? Do I have to relent and just deal with the fact that Rompers Are Happening outside elementary schools? Unforgivable pun time: Is a grown-up dinner on the town now, and forever, a rompin’ circumstance?
Not enough of any of these — never enough! — but still a nice showing.
I haven’t had a chance to watch the Katy Perry halftime show yet, so I’m excluding that from this post, but we’ll deal with it eventually. In the meantime, please enjoy this assortment of athletes, actors whose star wattage is flickering precariously at best, and the occasional actual celeb.
[Photos: Splash, Getty]
Well, this wasn’t a dress I was in a hurry to see again, but here it is, a year and a week after Malin Akerman donned it at the 2014 Globes:
It seems to fit Olivia better, but honestly, this has the whiff of Last Dress Standing about it rather than being anyone’s first choice. I think one of my beefs with it is, it’s not a gown you can really do much to enhance. The sleeves and the sternum netting make it tough to accessorize, it doesn’t seem like it’d look that great with an updo, and it apparently didn’t inspire either one of them to up her lipstick game… Frankly, Olivia’s glazed expression is a little, “Please ask me about my torso so that you won’t ask me about this movie.” To declare a winner feels sort of wrong but maybe we can say which one is losing less.