Fugger: Gwen Stefani

Met Ball Fug Carpet: Gwen Stefani

You need to know that I thought almost everyone looked CRACKED OUT at the Met Ball last night. Seriously, for me, that was one scorching disaster of a red carpet. Maybe it’s because I was gone last week and so I’m coming back with my crank settings calibrated to go up to eleven (or fourteen), or maybe the break left me refreshed and ready to attack, like a pit bull who’s been on an asparagus diet for too long. But SO MANY PEOPLE chose things that were either boring, or disappointing, or truly hideous. Case in point: Gwen Stefani.

This is somehow boring AND disappointing AND truly hideous. She looks like she was just busted playing mermaid in someone’s bridal factory outlet. Worse, she has one of the best bodies out there, and this terrible, lazy dress makes her look dumpy. The words “Gwen Stefani IS… DUMPY” should not exist outside another remake of Snow White. Are we supposed to think it’s really punk and subversive to show up dressed as a months-old unshopped clearance rack, and therefore give her an A-plus? Because… no. I’ve accepted that a lot of people are going to tell me that I Just Don’t Get It, but here’s the thing: I don’t WANT to get this. So I hope it’s not catching.

[Photo: Getty]


AMAs Fug AND Fab, Gwen Stefani

As Heather noted last week, Gwen really IS ageless. And she’s DEFINITELY going through a Madonna phase.


MTV EMAs Fug or Fab: Gwen Stefani

This woman doesn’t age.

Also, if you think this is just a blouse, then you don’t know her very well.

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Fugloween 2012

Here are two things I’ve learned from doing postings this Halloween: 1) I am pretty sure Chris Brown’s costume is going to make your head explode, and b) I’d best not even try to ID most of these costume for fear of angering Fug Nation when I get it wrong. Some folks are REALLY disgusted that I happen not to have seen Moonlight Kingdom. It’s like I personally knifed them, just because I can’t watch or get to the movies as much as I’d like. Please forgive, Fug Nation. I hate it when we fight. At LEAST wait until I can acquire and don some leggings as pants, so that your disappointment can be complete.

[Photos: WENN, Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Bauer-Griffin, INF]


Fug or Fab: Gwen Stefani

I recognize that this is an enormous amount of animal print. It’s an embarrassment of animal print. Even a leopard is looking at this and going, “Lady, tone it down. You’re not out on the savanna.”

However, she’s carrying it off as much as anyone ever will. I mean, if you’re going to see a celebrity in this suit — if it is inevitable — you want it to be either Gwen Stefani or Sharon Stone. Wait, now I’m sad it wasn’t Sharon Stone. SHARON. Why have you forsaken us?

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[Photo: WENN]


Teen Choice Awards Well Played: Gwen Stefani

There are a lot of times I don’t subscribe to the philosophy, “Gwen Stefani is cooler than thou.” But this is not one of them. No offense to thee, obviously.

[Photos: Getty]


Well Coldplayed, Gwen Stefani

I’ve talked before about how I don’t like giving people a pass for stuff just because of who they are — even SWINTON, really. She’s awesome to behold, and all, but if she looks insane I’m not pulling the punch. Ditto Gwen Stefani. However, there are definitely times when Gwen and her ilk can pull off something few others could, and she wore one such outfit to the Coldplay concert this weekend:

I mean, I would look ridiculous in that outfit. People would be all, “Are you in costume as one of the T-Mobile girl’s bike mechanics?” And yet on Gwen it looks natural and casual and cool. Even with the clashy red lipstick. Well done, madam. I don’t love your belt, but your moxie is appreciated.

[Photo: WENN]