Fugger: Dakota Johnson

Fug or Fine: Dakota Johnson in Saint Laurent


This How To Be Single movie looks excruciating, which means I will totally be watching it on a plane in six months. But Dakota’s head and makeup here are perfection:

dakota johnson

The dress… it’s not my personal bag of tea. I have a hard time getting excited about being covered in a bunch of starfish, looking like a beach that’s been hit with a rogue wave chock full of marine life. In less elegant terms, I don’t want things on me. But I have to give it to Dakota that the cut is pretty on her, and without actually knowing much about her, this entire aesthetic — a little bit boho, a little bit vintage – still feels organic. I believe that she would want this dress, rather than being handed it and told to suck it p and change before she missed her limo. Call it a case of the context making the clothes seem more becoming than, to my sensibilities, they ordinarily might be.

[Photo: Getty]

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What the Fug: Dakota Johnson in Gucci


We forgot to post this when it first happened on The Tonight Show, but it’s too bananas to let slide any further. Behold, what happens when you beg an actress over and over again to embrace color:

Dakota Johnson tonight show

It’s like a mixture of a cartoon present, this Reem Acra show, and a store that sells the sort of dolls whose eyes follow you no matter where you are. Her nose has been well and truly thumbed at us all.

it improved with Seth Meyers

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Fubs and Fabs: Celebrity Coat Edition


Because it rained today and I am in the mood for some BRR.

[Photos: Fame/Flynet]

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People’s Choice Awards Fug or Fab: Dakota Johnson (And Friends)


Dakota didn’t walk the red carpet — several of the bigwigs didn’t, actually, like Sandra Bullock — and I have to say, I find that frustrating. It’s the People’s Choice Awards. It may not feel like a real award ceremony, but I BELIEVE all the winners have been pre-notified? Regardless, if you are nominated by fans for an award VOTED on by fans, and you have won it, then walk the freaking red carpet as a thank-you to the people that put you there. It’s not a lot to ask. Maybe her ensuing wardrobe malfunction was the universe giving her a karmic rap on the knuckles.

[Photos: Getty]

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Not As Bad As It Should Be: Dakota Johnson in Gucci


This event always amuses me. Because so many of the women wear Gucci, one of the sponsors, and I have to wonder if they just look at their Gucci Options and think, “well…this is quite a melange. Let’s try something new.”

LACMA Art + Film Gala 2015

For my part, I cannot wait to see Dakota Johnson starring in Oklahoma! Her costume test for the role of Laurey — seen here, I assume? It’s obviously the only explanation — is going better than I would have anticipated. And “SEE DAKOTA IN OKLAHOMA!” has a wonderful, state-filled balance that appeals. She can sing, right? Sure. Let’s make this happen. Amy Schumer will make a sublime Ado Annie.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]

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Fug or Fab: Dakota Johnson in Gucci


Okay. Prepare yourself. I may be about to say something totally crazy. But I kind of like this?

19th Annual Hollywood Film Awards - Arrivals

I KNOW. So much of it is sheer — we are working with a real thigh window there, for one thing — but my theory is that this is the way to take the sheer trend and turn in into something that resembles…you know. Actual real clothing and not just a fancy-ass screen door wrapped around your ass. Is this true? Or have I just, finally, become assimilated?

[Photo: Getty]

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Fugs and Fabs: The 2015 InStyle Awards


I do love a mid-October awards show.

[Photos: Getty]

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