Fug File: Fugs

Better Played, Prince Harry


I swear to God, he left the house SOLELY so that these terrible trousers were not our last memory of him:

Plaid Pants there — Jackie Stewart, a famous former Formula One driver — is, I hope, giving Harry a strongly-worded lesson in how to pull off Wacky Pants with elan. I hope he’s taking notes.

[Photo: Getty]

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Fugta Ora and Fuggy Azalea


I really love the pattern Rita Ora is wearing and wish someone would make it a tennis dress at the U.S. Open.

Having said that, everything about the rest of BOTH their outfits makes them look like Romy and Michele’s High School Cheerleading Audition.

[Photo: Fane/Flynet]

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WTF: Keira Knightley in Delpozo


One on hand, this is crazy. On the other hand, she is being adorable throughout this press tour.

Keira-Knightley (1)

She looks like if Mrs Roper won the Lottery and invested in some REALLY high-class caftans. They’re glamorous and glorious and high-fashion and…still a wacky caftan. But I can’t really be too peevish with someone who has clearly popped out for her Q&A saying, “HI GUYS I’M IN A CAFTAN!”

It’s almost MORE amusing when she’s seated:

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Fug the Waxwork: Wills and Kate, Part 2


Remember how Madame Tussauds had a really good William and Kate Waxwork? Well, apparently someone took a spin through the museum and decided, “that looks too realistic. Let’s redo it and totally screw it up.” AND ERGO BEHOLD:

The William was, as Heather said previously, “mildly wonkus” and he’s still mildly wonkus but in a different direction. Now he kind of looks like if a waxwork of Prince William were possessed by the spirit of Paul Walker (forever in our hearts). I guess he’s the same percentage of wonkus, but now they just made him look more like a bro. But they took a Kate that totally looked like Kate and unKated her. It’s like one of the bigwigs got drunk at a holiday party and was like, “youknowwhat? THIS IS TOO GOOD. Can we make this LESS SUCCESSFUL? THANKS.” First of all: Kate would never carry a clutch that large to a formal event, like, DUH, take a twirl through my archives, Madame Tussauds. But more importantly: her face now looks like a vaguely cute girl who once played a tertiary role on a now-canceled Disney Channel show. Like if Lifetime decided to remake their Wills and Kate movie but Camilla Luddington was like, “once was enough,” and this kid whizzed past the execs on a scooter as they stepped out of their meeting and they were like, “HEY COME BACK, yeah, close enough.”

In short: updated waxworks a downgrade. ZERO STARS.

[Photo: Getty]

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The Fug and the Furious: Jordana Brewster


So, I’m taking this outfit to mean that Jordana Brewster is starring in a reboot of Xanadu, as one of Kira’s Muse Friends who does interpretive dance with interpretive hair and hideous cult-outfits? (Xanadu is a weird movie. I love it, but it’s terrible. A man skates through a wall as a plot point.)

Because honestly, this is NOT a cult I am interested in joining, I don’t care how many Magic Erasers they have.

[Photo: Pacific Coast News]

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Fugs and Fabs: The Serpentine Gallery Summer Party, Part 1


Lily Allen goes semi-bare assed, while Princess Beatrice has never looked better, Keira Knightley tries to pulls off some advanced science and Lady Victoria Hervey returns with a FRESH BATCH OF CRAZY.

[Photos: Getty, AKM/GSI, Pacific Coast News]

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