Fug File: Fugs

Fug Haven: Julianne Hough in Philosophy

Well. It’s not boring?

But it’s also the kind of dress that looks like a giant crazed Ace bandage on anyone other than Cate Blanchett, and I saw Rock of Ages. While I have mad secret guilty pleasure love for that movie and I think Julianne is actually kind of charming in it, Cate Blanchett she is not. Although I would have paid $35 to see Cate Blanchett in Rock of Ages. Maybe more.

[Photo: Splash]


Fugs of Leon: Lily Aldridge in Marc Jacobs

I love this picture.

This was for the Save Venice Enchanted Garden Ball — apparently Venice is famous for elaborate carnival headgear, so leave it off at your own peril — which raised $700,000 to help save the city from the constant threat of erosion. And the sight of Padma in that thing is truly marvelous to behold. I sincerely hope that is her Facebook profile picture, and if she and I knew each other, this picture would come up whenever she called me. It’s like someone tried to make Marie Antoinette out of plants.

Her dress has an unfortunate and HIGHLY questionable diamond right on her nethers, but as the clothes go, it’s Aldridge — and the wasted beauty of that glorified panty sheath — that takes the cake. And then smashes it into the floor destructively, like someone who doesn’t understand how freaking awesome cake is and that it should be respected.

[Photo: Getty]


Fugphy Wife: Malin Akerman in Jonathan Simkhai

This is a perfect storm of somebody doing as little as possible to sell an outfit:

Granted, it’s never fair to compare anyone to a model, but at least she is standing ramrod straight and giving the top its best shot at looking architecturally cool. I DO think it’s possible the tube-top thing underneath is a cup size too small, which is why her chest appears to be frowning, but I mean… she’s slouching, her hair looks really blah, and none of her accessories are giving this any zing at all. So while the dress itself is just unflattering and wrong on her, she had a few chances to at least TRY and deflect that, and she didn’t take them. We are EASILY SWAYED by shiny bright things, Malin. USE THAT.

[Photo: Getty]


Fugging It Up at the Los Angeles Times Festival of Books

Hello, Los Angelenos!

As a gentle reminder THIS WEEKEND is the Los Angeles Times Festival of Books! It’s an awesome, awesome event for book lovers – the complete schedule of events and all the details are available at the Festival of Books website, and you should check it out  if you live in Southern California — and Heather and I will be appearing on a panel  called “Young Adult Fiction: A Little Help from My Friends,” on Sunday, April 13th, at 12pm. Our moderator is the awesome Aaron Hartzler, and Heather and I will be appearing along with fabulous authors Robin Benway and Lauren Myracle. We will be there to talk about — as you can probably guess from the title of the panel — our YA books Spoiled and Messy. (Our new adult book, The Royal We, will be primed and ready to go at next year’s FoB, but at the moment we are literally still writing it.)

There will be a Q&A, as well as a book signing after the panel, so come on out and meet us, get books signed, ask us about the new book, the old books, books we didn’t even write, where I got my bracelet, whatever you like! IT IS FREE! You can even take the subway if you’re so inclined/there’s a stop by your house. (Parking is not free; parking is $10; there’s more logistical info here.)

I also feel that I would be remiss if I didn’t tell you that JACKIE COLLINS (!!!!!) will be doing a cooking demo on Sunday at 11am. Come for Jackie Collins, STAY FOR US!


Fugretary: Maggie Gyllenhaal at “The Honourable Woman” Photocall

Okay. I have spent a LOT of time noting that I dislike this haircut on her but you know what? I actually really kind of like it now that it’s blonde. (Here’s what it looked like brunette.) The lighter hair opens up her face more, and I think it’s just more flattering. (It’s just a little wee longer now too.) Am I crazy? It’s better blond, right?

As a matter of fact, I like her whole head here:

Too bad the rest of this is kind of a napkin-inspired mess; I’m giving her the pass on those shoes (for once; her shoes are often bad regardless) because she’s clearly injured her foot. But man. This dress makes me sad. I think it’s SO CLOSE to being awesome and architectural and cool, but instead it just ends up wearing her. It’s too big, too floppy, just too much.  It’s like the Charmin factory exploded on her and she barely made it out alive.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]


Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie recap, season 3, episode 16

Zoe Hart, sometimes you are an idiot. Sure, for reasons that cannot be contravened without making this a wholly other show, but still. STILL.