Vision of Fug, Yet Also, Well Played, Mariah Carey


Apparently Mariah Carey featured on last night’s NFL kickoff telecast, and she was in costume as what I imagine Donald Trump’s living room to be.

Sweet, merciful glitter. (Not to be confused with sweet, merciful Glitter, which is somehow simultaneously neither of those things yet also both of those things.) A mullet of gold and tawny gossamer cape-wings! CAPE-WINGS. I have never been so giddy over a hyphen sandwich in my life as that one. It’s a gift from on high. If this is the sort of thing we’re in for during her American Idol judging tenure, I am SO in. Especially if it inspires a jealous J.Lo to reappear and attempt to establish fugstasmagorical dominance once more. I would love to see that fug-off. Please, universe, give us this much.

[Photo: Getty]

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Comments (12):

  1. Art Eclectic
    0

    It pains me that I love this outfit on someone whom I simply cannot stand as a human being.

    I think she might be wearing my perfect romantic master bedroom.

  2. katkin74
    0

    There’s a pic on People, when I first saw it I thought, “Put some clothes on woman!”. It’s like the older she gets, the more possessed she becomes with the poltergeist of Boobs Legsly.

  3. Lindy
    0

    Ah, Mimi. She’s always so restrained, so refined.

  4. Jen M
    0

    You made my day with “tawny gossamer cape-wings.”
    Hats off, wordsmith!

  5. Heironyms.
    0

    Oh, Mariah. We already HAVE a Stevie Nicks.

  6. Sandra
    0

    I’m guessing the average NFL fan doesn’t know or care about Mariah Carey regardless of what she wears. It is unfortunate that somebody’s German Shepard took a big bite out of her skirt just before she went on stage. Except for that, it would be a great outfit, albeit bearing no relation whatsoever to the event to which she wore it.

  7. vandalfan
    0

    Oh, Mimi, as adorable as a basket of kittens, which I understand is required to be in the green room of every one of her concerts, according to her contract rider. Naw, The Smoking Gun tells me otherwise, but what a great rumor.

  8. Helen
    0

    She’s trying to be the new Liberace!

  9. Emma
    0

    I’ve never understood why Mariah dresses like an ageing diva.

  10. Lily1214
    0

    I love Mariah. She Always manages to out-do all the other rock stars.