Fug File: White House Correspondents' Dinner
This is terribly muddled, and I only want muddling when it comes to cocktails:
I LOVE a print, especially on a formal dress — Jessica Simpson (I know) wore one to this very event, which we’ll get to later, and I think it was great — but this looks inspired by the bedspread at a Motel 6 off the interstate, and there’s just SO MUCH OF IT. Every time I look at this, I think, “well, Miranda got duped,” as if this were the end of some C plot in an old forgotten Sex and the City where Miranda unwittingly befriends a designer who keeps sticking her in things that are all wrong for her, as some kind of evil plot for revenge. (Which is clearly ridiculous, if only because none of the SatC women ever made new girlfriends.) And I keep wanting to fix it, but all my fixes make it a completely different dress. Like, make it a mini and whack off the sleeves and give it a belt and it could work but that’s also a TOTALLY DIFFERENT OUTFIT. Which is probably what she should have done in the first place, anyway.
From the waist up, I love it:
The polka dots are charming, and her lipstick is FANTASTIC, as usual. And Oscar de la Renta feels perfect for her — so classic and feminine, and never, ever vulgar. BUT! (You know that was coming.) I’m not sure if this is fully selling it for me. Heather noted that the bottom of the peplum looked like a shower cap, tacked on to her bodice, and now that’s all I can see. It’s a damn cute shower cap, but a shower cap it is. I think if we’d lost the peplum, we’d be in business. But I am also officially Over The Peplum. If neither Lupita nor Kate can sell me on a peplum, I am definitely unsellable.
she had her baby two weeks ago. Between keeping the birth under wraps and keeping her wedding secret for so long, I am beginning to think Kerry Washington might have actual magical powers. She had that baby at CEDERS, which is like, smack in the middle of the paparazzi zone and no one found out. The only answer is a Disillusionment Charm. That said, everyone else held down the fort more or less admirably. Do we think Columbus Short is home, angrily eating a giant bag of Doritos and just cursing himself for being such an idiot?
Heather said that Rose here looked like she was trying to “hatch her way out of mourning,” and I don’t disagree. There is some weird Shedding of the Chrysalis thing happening here, and not in the way where it’s actually a lovely metaphor. Maybe crawl back into the chrysalis, babe, because you look like you’re STUCK in it. But what this also looks like to me is that she got this planning to deploy it at the Met Gala (tonight!) but then she didn’t get an invite or decided she didn’t want to go for some reason — boiling feud with Hailee Steinfeld or someone, surely — and then decided, “you know what? I’ve got this crazy dress. I AM WEARING IT.”