We saw the models; now see Rihanna and Everyone Else. Pink hair! Kanye! A confused Suki Waterhouse!
It should come as no surprise that A LOT of models attended the big Vogue party that was hosted during Paris Fashion Week. It also shouldn’t shock you that fully half of them look INSANE.
[Photos: Fame/Flynet, Getty]
In which we are reminded that Rihanna can wear that which no mere human should attempt, and Cressida Bonas tries on a tent. PLEASE NOTE: The total absence of one Ms Jennifer Lawrence.
Dollars to donuts this “unauthorized” movie was done with input from Tori Spelling. She comes off in this like a very pleasant genius who was the engine behind this show existing and having the cast that it did, and also, this aired in conjunction with an hour wherein Tori got hooked up to a lie detector — it was called Tori Spelling: Celebrity Lie Detector, punctuated as if she herself is the human polygraph of other famous people, which is a show I actually MIGHT watch — and answered questions about 90210. (She claims she slept with Jason Priestley and Brian Austin Green, and there is a story about the dress in which she lost her virginity that I will make you Google to find out because ew.) And since Tori was once a Lifetime staple and that True Tori abomination about her marriage woes aired on this network, I’m feeling confident that she at least provided a few insider details — but sadly, not enough to make this juicy.
Fuggery: 6. Points added for the Steve wig, but most of the rest of it felt both period appropriate and kind of tame. Where were Brenda’s neckties?!?
Fromage: 6. The Sharknado joke? Oy. And the music cues were horrible. They actually used a “wah-waaaaaah” noise when the cast was imagining a luxe studio setup only to be met with the disgusting Van Nuys junkyard. But I would’ve loved a cheesier plunge into the meatier issues.
F*ckwittery: 4. With a project this shallow, that avoided doing much research or trying that hard to present anything unusual, it’s hard for people to have a CHANCE to act like total f*ckwits. My big complaint is the lack of new information or deep treatment of any of it, and zero stuff about how ANY of them were coping with fame or their place on the call sheet (except for Shannen, and thrice with Luke and Jason being mobbed by a twenty-person group of fans). How was Ian Ziering handling it? Was BAG having to finish school on-set, thus underscoring that he was the youngest of the crew? Were there mini-cliques? Etc. So most of the f*ckwittery is production-related, and the fact that when you try and rush something out, it’s never going to be as satisfying. Darren Star comes off as pretty dedicated and well-intentioned and competent. Aaron Spelling comes off as supportive, if slightly clownish. The most awkward part is trying to make Tori the hero of the piece when it’s only tangentially to do with her. Oh, I DID think it was intriguing that in the scene where it’s announced that Mattel would only initially be making dolls of Brenda, Kelly, Dylan, and Brandon, the only actors present to be disappointed were Gabrielle, Ian, and Brian. WHITHER TORI? Mysteriously not there, methinks so that the movie couldn’t draw attention to the fact that Donna was not considered marquee.
I just feel that I need to state, for the record, that I am taking a Ryan Murphy Hiatus, until his OJ Simpson mini-series, at which point IT IS ON. (ROSS GELLER is Robert Kardashian! Selma Blair as Kris Jenner!) Sadly, I don’t know if Chloe Sevigny will be in it, but she IS in this. As you can see.
There weren’t as many bananas lines this week, so for the Quote of the Episode I’m going with the graceful Lucious Lyon lyric, “Snitch. Bitch. Snitchin’-ass bitch.” The thing is, it was actually pretty freaking catchy (written by Petey Pablo, who cameos in the scene as some dude named Clyde who gets tagged in the lyrics). He’s so lucky that he can just open his mouth and have a complete song fall out of it.
How is it already October??? While you reflect on the ever-quickening passage of time, please enjoy the following.
– At Book Riot: 8 Classic Novels Retitled As Clickbait
– Love this chat with the costume designer for Girls, over at Design*Sponge.
– Blake Lively is closing Preserve. Here’s the take on Lainey Gossip.
– This is neat! From Mode, 100 years of wedding gowns in 3 minutes. (You Tube)
– You guys, Keanu is aging SO HANDSOMELY. (Lainey)
– The New York Times did a whole piece on how fashionable Pacey is now.
– OBVIOUSLY you want to read this recent, and dishy, interview with Christine Elise — or, as you may know her, 90210′s Emily Valentine. (Complex)
– And if you enjoyed that, you might want to read this (longform!) piece about Ina Garten at Eater. It’s fascinating and good. (I love Ina; I have literally all of her cookbooks.)
–Pajiba suggests some creepy podcasts for October. (I swear, podcasts are the only way I get any housework done at all.)
– Also at Pajiba: Anne of Green Gables Is a God Damned Fashion Icon. TRUE.
– I hope to master The J Crew Roll on all my sleeves this fall! (College Prepster)
– At Refinery29, I LOVE this piece about the power of the black turtleneck, which is one of my own personal favorite items of clothing.
– Your recipe link for the week is near and dear to my heart. At Camilla Styles, maple molasses donuts. I LOVE YOU DONUTS.
– Did you know that, per Refinery29, You Can Eat A Holiday Feast In The Great Hall At Hogwarts???!?!?!?!?! At least until the Dementors show up and ruin everything.
– This is fascinating, at Lapham’s Quarterly: When Women Ruled Fashion.
– And, at All Things Georgian, a look at Georgian era bling.
– Tim Gunn DOES NOT like Anna Wintour. By the way, the story that he tells about her being carried down stairs, which Anna’s people deny? I heard it far before this all came out, and from a very reliable source. ALSO, the stairs down which she was allegedly carried ARE TERRIFYING so I understand the thought process. You know, kinda. (Celebitchy)