MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Well. THIS should never have happened.

MILA KUNIS: What? I mean, which thing in particular?

MICHELLE: The thing where we’re two actresses, dark hair, roughly the same height, standing next to each other wearing black and the same hair. So awkward.

MILA: That’s all? You don’t want to talk about your dress?

MICHELLE: What’s wrong with my dress? I was thinking it was so awkward for you, standing there in basic black being really unfamous next to someone who was on both Buffy AND Gossip Girl.

MILA: Oh. And here I was feeling weird for you because your makeup makes you look sickly and your dress is sagging under the weight of the TP someone’s little brother glued to it.

MICHELLE: Don’t try and pull that with me, pipsqueak. What CW shows have you been on?

MILA: … Yes, you’re right, none. Boy, you got me.

MICHELLE: YES I DID.

MILA: I will go cry myself to sleep as images of the phrase “Golden Globe-nominated actress Mila Kunis” dance in my grieving head.

MICHELLE: Oh, please. Everyone knows the Golden Globes don’t actually exist.

MILA: Neither did your Buffy character, sort of.

MICHELLE: If you even TRY to talk Buffy nuance with me I will sic the Whedonverse on you so fast, your eyes will shoot daiquiries.

MILA: Fair enough. Let’s just call this a wash and never speak again.

MICHELLE: DEAL.