Fug Men


I love how doubtful that dude looks — I love, in general, looking at the expressions of people who find themselves in the backgrounds of candid shots like this.

He’s totally thinking, “Damn it, Hendricks, I had you going SO MUCH FURTHER in Fug Madness this year. 2013 IS OUR YEAR.”

[Photo: Splash]

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Comments (48):

  1. LoriK
    0

    I can’t even with her any more. I’m also more than ready for the maxi dress to go away, so this is a twofer of Fug.

  2. Christian
    0

    Well, at least her boobs aren’t hoisted up to her chin. Baby steps.

    • cycler
      0

      +1 on that. It seems like so often she goes out in something that’s so aggressively shoving her cleavage in your face in a way that looks literally painful.

      This also seems like it might look better when she’s standing still rather than in an action shot.

  3. Annie E
    0

    I don’t think it’s that bad. The worst part is the top of the skirt, which looks like a random band of spandex-cotton blend.

    • Megan
      0

      Now that you mention it, I don’t really care for the top’s material, either. The style, though, I like. I could do without the string….things, but other than that, it’s a good cut for her.

      I think the skirt is way too long. How much better would this have looked if it went to her knees?

      http://traderjoesreviewer.blogspot.com

  4. Robert
    0
  5. Eliza Bennett
    0

    What in God’s name? Why did she steal Charlie Sheen’s bowling shirt and tie a Hefty bag under it?

  6. theotherjennifer
    0

    Can I *GET* a color??…. thank you

  7. Orange clouds
    0

    WOW!! (That’s all that came to mind. And not in a good way.)

  8. Katharine
    0

    While I understand that a frontal elevation of that much prominence might act as a crumb catcher, I think it’s a bit much for her to go out in public wearing an actual bib.

    Strangely, her entire look in this ensemble reminds me of many of Liz Taylor’s less flattering sartorial fails later in life, only with fewer diamonds and redder hair.

  9. Erin
    0

    I think she has a tough body to dress, so I feel for her. It’s much easier to be a tiny size 2 and look great in skinny jeans and a tank top (especially if you don’t need a bra), so I think she has to work harder to look ok. That said, I think the top is fine; the skirt is a little lingerie-esque.

    • Jessica
      0

      I don’t know. I know LOTS of women who aren’t tiny — many who are about her size — and who go out looking amazing all the time. And they don’t have the funds she does, nor the connections and resources. Christina’s body is very well proportioned, as well. I actually think there is any number of looks that would work beautifully on her, many of which we’ve seen when she’s styled for magazines, and which we’ve seen on Mad Men. Pencil skirt/v-neck sweater. Good jeans and a v-neck. A wrap dress. I really don’t get why she doesn’t stick to classic shapes — a classic shape doesn’t have to be boring. Moreover, she seems to be avoiding color lately, which is insane to me.

      • Eliza Bennett
        0

        I am a 32H (H is for Holy Hell…or maybe How did this happen?!) and I promise I never look that terrible. If she shopped at Target she could find stuff that worked. It’s not her body that’s the problem. It’s her taste.
        I love C.Hen. I just…can’t with her and this egregious misuse of natural resources.

      • Maretha2
        0

        I’m with Eliza — I’m about the same size and proportions as Hendricks, and I have never felt the need to hoist the girls under my chin. It’s not that impossible to find professional or formal clothes that look good and flatter my shape. Is it harder than being a Hollywood starlet size 0? Maybe, but it sure isn’t impossible.
        I think Hendricks is gorgeous, and I wish she’d do more to show that women with our body size/shape can dress ourselves, thankyouverymuch.

      • Sajorina
        0

        Just a year ago I was a size 2 & a 32DD, but after having breast reduction surgery and spraning an ankle, I gained 30 lbs.! So, I’m now a size 8 and a 34D! Believe me, it’s harder for me to find clothes that fit well without having to do some adjusting at my current size, but that’s what tailors are for!

      • yeahandalso
        0

        Can we get Octavia Spencer to teach a learning annex class for people like Christina Hendricks?

  10. Geemeedee
    0

    I might be ok with this except for that smooth strip right below the waist. Yeah, I know pleats are a full-figured gal’s enemy, but this solution sucks.

    HOWEVER, her skin looks delish and she seems happy. Too bad about the unfortunate lipstick choice.

  11. Willow
    0

    I love the top, but then we get the waist and it’s basically a drunken cummerbund.

  12. neiges
    0

    Sorry to sound crancky but when I read “fug men” I expect me some Hamm.
    I have no idea how to dress a body like Hendrick’s. When I was in post-pregnancy mode, I had no idea what to wear (never having had any boobs at all etc). That said, I am not a professional in fashion. I don’t believe it’s that difficult to dress her. she has all the proportions right, has a great body with all the right curves and is drop dead gorgeous. What’s tough about this?

  13. katie s.
    0

    That dress somehow makes her boobs like twice as big as they actually are, which are ample indeed.

  14. Minutiae
    0

    I have similarly ginormous, erm, proportions in certain areas, and it just isn’t as hard as she makes it seem to dress them. Er, herself. Whatever. The keys:

    1) Good bra in the correct size to keep ‘em wrangled and in the right place.
    2) Fitted at the waist, but not belted. This goes for dresses and tops of all kinds, even tees. Never tuck in a shirt.
    3) Modest V, scoop, or square necks. Never boat, never crew, never turtle.
    4) No high-waisted skirts or pants, ever.

    Everything else just needs to be the right size.

    • Maretha2
      0

      Yes, exactly. Thank you, Minutiae. See, Hendricks, here’s how to dress in 4 easy steps!

    • pidget
      0

      I third that, Minutiae I’m a scaled-down version of this shape, and those are pretty much my rules, unless I want people staring at my chest. For special events, why not, but for zipping around town – fitted, covered (not swaddled or choked) and sleek are my goals. Stiff fabric, bunching and foof are the enemies.

      I also wonder about colour – she’s got such beautiful colouring, and her costumes really set it off. Why so funereal?

    • Helen
      0

      I’m busty, too (and petite, and broad-shouldered, a triple whammy with clothing), and I disagree with “Never tuck in.” With the right cut, tucking in can look very tidy. Not that I often find the right cut and do it…

      Otherwise, though, spot on, Minutiae, nicely done!

  15. Leah
    0

    I disagree about what that door-holder man’s facial expression is telling us. It’s saying, “I run into C. Hen, and it had to be the ONE day she covers up her mountainous bosom?” Except he’s a man, so insert a dirty word in place of “mountainous bosom.”

  16. The Fugger
    0

    The main heinousness is the skirt area (spandex is a friend to very few), if anything. I also think that the way it’s shot – yeah – makes it look more fug than it would if she were standing.

    That said, Little Pete must be PISSED that his bowling shirts keep getting stolen by Hollyweird stars.

  17. Kendra
    0

    Oh screw it, I’m totally feeling this. Maybe it’s because I love me a maxi dress – not a la Kardashian, more a la…feh I can’t think of a good example. But they exist. I’m a good example of how to wear a maxi dress, but I’m not famous. Dang nabit.

  18. Maretha2
    0

    I do like her hair in this picture.

  19. Kendra
    0

    Actually, maybe I like this because to me she’s got great face here. And great hair. Sometimes I think her makeup can be a little heavy, and I’m never a fan of her in severe hair. But she looks fab here, not to mention happy. She’s got good face.

  20. vandalfan
    0

    Why does she always chose fashions that make her look heavy set? She has a lovely figure, just large breasts.

  21. Kris M
    0

    I’m sick of her. She’s just kind of weird looking, like besides her breasts and hair, everything looks eerily small. Face, teeth, arms. Just weird.

    • Sajorina
      0

      I don’t see what you see and, if that was the case, it wouldn’t be her fault!

    • Dani
      0

      I see it too. It’s not her fault, but her features are WAY too small for her face and her pointy little chin annoys me. Her head is too small for her body.

  22. Sandra
    0

    So yeah, a couple of points for not shoving the girls in our faces. But “collar-bone” and “waist” are not the only two options when deciding what to do with them. For hell’s sake, Westerly, Rhode Island, of all places, has a specialist bra shop. Certainly they have them where she lives!

  23. Sajorina
    0

    I like it! I think she looks beautiful and it fits her well! Plus, hair, makeup, shoes & accessories work well together!

  24. ok
    0

    This is seriously fugly. Maitre D’Little House on the Prairie.

    I honestly can’t believe she left the house in this. This is hideous.

  25. Erin
    0

    I wonder if that guy realizes he’s dressed like Doug Funny.

    • Annie E
      0

      Oh my God.

    • The Fugger
      0

      Oh God, I actually see it now.

      …if we’re going to split hairs, he’s almost got it but not quite. He just needs to be wearing shorts.

      (Also: Funnie, IIRC.)

  26. Shiitake
    0

    She’s one of the most beautiful women on television–that looks like a living, breathing woman instead of a Qtip–and she shlumps around at press junkets looking like this.

    It makes me sad.

  27. anny
    0

    “Sr. Christina on her way to dress rehearsal for the Easter choir concert.”

    What’s wrong here? The “colors” and their placement. The belt. The sleeves. The unfortunate yoke on the skirt. THE BODICE HAS BUTTONS AND A STRING TIE.

    How much longer can this go on?

  28. Helen
    0

    The hair is beautiful, and with features and skin like that, I even like the bright lipstick. God she’s gorgeous. But how on earth does this dress manage to make Hendricks look fat? She really, really isn’t! It’s one of the most beautiful figures on Earth! Shame, shame on whoever told her “Sweetie, you look great. Just wear it.” Because you KNOW she had doubts.

    At least, I hope she did…

  29. fritanga
    0

    It’s official: Hendricks just has appalling fashion sense. This has nothing to do with her body. She has bad taste. Stylists can’t help her, just as they can’t help Miley Cyrus, Vanessa Hudgens, any Kardashian or Thomas Jane. They’re all beyond help.

  30. Maria
    0

    I seriously wish she could just really be Joan Holloway and dress in her clothes.

    Her costumes are always 1000% better than her real clothes.

  31. CJ
    0

    Ms. Hendricks doesn’t have horrible taste. Her big issue is fit, and when you have THE MOST AMAZING hourglass figure to put your clothes onto, fit is everything. If she has a ‘regular’ stylist now, I think she should switch and see if her Mad Man costumer would work with her instead. They do such a great job with her. Obviously, a costumer makes from scratch or custom-fits clothes if needed (and that’s probably what they do for her), but they really seem to know her body and what she looks good in and how to fit her properly. In addition to dressing her for events, they could certainly advise her for her “off time” clothes as well. First on the list: unless you’ve had a fitting for it, stay away from woven tops! I don’t know why she wears button-downs. As a fellow hourglass (though mine isn’t as fabulous as hers), I stay away from woven tops like the plague. Jersey material and knits fit my top better because they cling to my waist but stretch to accommodate my bust.

  32. Erin W
    0

    Maybe she just doesn’t want her clothes to compete with her face. God knows I wouldn’t, if I had hers.