Fugger: Jessica Chastain

Cannes Fairly Well Played: Jessica Chastain in Armani

The very first time Jessica Chastain appeared on GFY, it was in a canary dress not dissimilar to this one at Cannes five years ago. This feels like the more refined, glamourpuss version of the original.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]


Met Gala Fine or Fab: Jessica Chastain in Prada

The color of this dress is deep and magnificent.

Jessica Chastain

The cut is also extremely flattering, save for the usual razor-sharp nipple darts that pock the chests of nearly every Prada gown. Here, the lace bib offsets it a bit, but it’s also flirting with Schoolmarm. The base is more Old West Brothel Madam, and the wisps on the skirt are… quite possibly remnants of the Lost smoke monster. There’s a randomness to all that which feels like four people trying to have a conversation without fully speaking each other’s languages. She’s carrying it as best she can, but don’t you wish we could wipe the slate clean and start over with the embellishments? Or even give that blue fabric a pattern? It’s like Quantico in dress form: solid start, but limping confused and aimlessly to the finish.

she actually wore some other stuff too


Fug or Fab: Jessica Chastain in Altuzarra at The Huntsman Premiere

After the weekend’s bizarre MTV Movie Awards miss, it’s nice to see Jessica Chastain bounce back with something that’s interesting, possibly quite beautiful, and unlikely to run afoul of any dueling pistols at dawn.

[Photos: Getty, Fame/Flynet]


MTV Movie Awards Fug Carpet: Jessica Chastain in Givenchy

Every dress tends to have its time and place.

Jessica Chastain

And this one’s time is not the 2016 MTV Movie Awards, an evening which suggests all the enduring cultural significance of the Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards but without the gallons of slime (and usually with considerably more thigh). I would have placed this instead, say, at Doc Holliday’s funeral, where buxom lass after buxom lass would come in and throw her teary self over the coffin and scream, “I LOVED YOU, you BASTARD.” Or perhaps at a deathbed poker game. Both of which, had they happened at the MTV Movie Awards, might have compelled me to watch them. Alas, all I have is this very discordant-seeming outfit and my imagination.

[Photo: Getty]


Fug or Fab the Cover: Jessica Chastain on PORTER

You know what they tell actors: Never work with small children or animals.


In this case, I can’t believe I’m about to type these words, but I seriously think Chastain is managing to drag focus from a baby kangaroo.  That takes skills.

[Cover: Porter]


Independent Spirit Awards Fug or Fab Carpet: Jessica Chastain in Elie Saab

First of all, you should know that it was very humid in Los Angeles this past weekend — surely to the great sadness of hair stylists everywhere. Second, you should know that the Daily Mail felt this look was “busty.” I don’t even know, sometimes.

[Photos: Fame/Flynet]


Unfug or Fab: Jessica Chastain in Carl Kapp

ALERT. A redhead has been spotted in green. Would that were enough for my stamp of approval.

Jessica Chastain national board of review 2016

That bodice, though, is pure indecision. One half wants to be Grecian and draped and romantic, and the other is like, “Nah, you go ahead, I’m going to stay here and proof the Church newsletter one more time.” If we lopped off that demi-sleeve, it might be enough. Because LOOK AT HER HEAD.

it’s stupendous