Fugger: Jessica Chastain

Wellish Played, Jessica Chastain


It’s been a slow week, and as we cruise into the end of June, the Fourth of July, the dark depths of midsummer… pickings are going to get slim. And I think Jessica Chastain sympathizes a little. (Just a little.)

jessica chastain vogue wimbledon

“Here,” she seems to be saying. “Here. Take it. I am out of the house, I am clean, I am in front of a camera. You can talk about my lipstick. You can talk about whether my shoes are too hoof-y or boring. You can speculate on whether I am secretly braceleted. You can even talk about whether this is a dress, or a shirt and skirt, and further, whether the top might actually be navy or Heather’s eyes are just deranged and desperate. I have done my part. I’m sorry it’s not crazier, but just be glad I’m here at all. Bloggers can’t be choosers. Now if you’ll excuse me, this is a Vogue/Wimbledon event, and I need to go ask Anna about how Roger Federer smells.”

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Met Gala Fugs and Fabs: Metallics


Anne Hathaway just might be the Droid I’m looking for, except I don’t want to end that sentence on the preposition, so I’m still typing.

[Photos: Getty]

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Unfug It Up: Jessica Chastain


You guys know I love a pattern.  HOWEVER:

Jameson Empire Awards 2015

Have I completely lost the plot or does she look vaguely upholstered in this? I mean, her head looks great and it’s certainly not a lost cause. In fact, I think it’s TOTALLY fixable. There just needs to be LESS of it. No sleeves, maybe, or a shorter skirt, or a v-neckline? Should we send someone over there with a pair of scissors? Hit me with your best styling suggestions.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]

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Fugs and Fabs: YET MORE Celebs at Paris Fashion Week


To be honest, I cannot understand how a Fashion Week is STILL HAPPENING. Hasn’t this been going on forever?

[Photos: INF]

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Fugs and Fabs: Solids at the Independent Spirit Awards


And we can put THIS sucker to bed, at last. Come for the ScarJo, stay for some Kristens, formal pajamas, and the new Supergirl.

[Photos: Getty]

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Oscars Strangely Played Carpet: Jessica Chastain in Givenchy and H&M


I had hoped fleetingly that she was just in her pupal stage, preparing to hatch out of one skin and into a better one she’d grown underneath it. Sadly, the Oscars are only ever that dramatic in my head.

[Photos: Getty]

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