Fug File: WTF

WTF: Kylie Jenner


Regardless of your feelings about showing up at anything for Chris Brown — even a charity event — I think we can all agree this is tone-deaf:

IT’S A KICKBALL GAME, child. AND NOT THE DOMINATRIX KIND.

[Photo: Splash]

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Fugs and Fabs: Selena Gomez


In case you missed it, we covered part of this Selena Gomez Italian Jaunt over the weekend, but I think I’ve saved the CRAZIEST for today. I hope you had a sustaining breakfast.

[Photo: AKM/GSI, Splash, Fame/Flynet]

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Fug the Concert Costume: Bey and Jay


Beyonce and Jay-Z at the On The Run Tour in New Jersey

JAY: Hey, Bey.

BEYONCE: Hey, Jay.

JAY: You okay?

BEY: Like a fine cabernet.

JAY: Should we cover some Sugar Ray?

BEY: I want to do “My Way.”

JAY: Maybe someday.

BEY: I get a say. I’m the one with leather up in my va-jay-jay.

JAY: I don’t want to hear this today.

BEY: What, in case it deflates your souffle?

JAY: My interest in this shows exponential decay.

BEY: Tell me: What does this mask portray?

JAY: Something risque? Like a minx in the CIA?

BEY: IT LOOKS LIKE A POWER PLAY.

JAY: Nah, it’s just a mystery buffet.

BEY: WHAT buffet? I CAN’T EAT. MY MOUTH IS BLOCKED OFF. AM I BEING SILENCED? AM I SUBSERVIENT TO YOU NOW ALL OF A SUDDEN?┬áDO YOU NOT GET WHY THIS LOOKS OFF?

JAY: Does that follow our rhyme? NAY.

BEY: FINE THEN. HOW’S THIS: I HOPE THAT’S A TOUPEE.

JAY: I miss Kanye.

[Photo: AKM-GSI]

 

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Casual Fuggerday: Jessica Szohr


Good old Vanessa from Brooklyn. At least she seems happy — which she probably IS, now that she’s off Gossip Girl and has been allowed to cut those third-hand extensions out of her hair.

Jessica Szohr at Justin Timberlake concert

However, a cuffed business jumpsuit is nothing to smile about — it almost looks more like an overgrown romper, especially when paired with what looks like a bra from Delia’s, or something. It’s like she manages business affairs for a troupe of clowns. All of whom are leaving her notes on her computer that say, “NAB, girl. XOXO, Gigglebones and Picklez.”

[Photo: AKM-GSI]

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What The Fug: Lindsay Hartley


Oh, Theresa Lopez-Fitzgerald. I know you had a hard life on Passions, including nearly being cremated alive, and going down to hell with Julian Crane and having to hang out with him there while Hitler wandered by you.

Lindsay Hartley at Hallmark upfronts (1)

But that’s no excuse for THIS much sideboob. AT THE HALLMARK CHANNEL UPFRONTS. I mean, Hallmark Channel probably has a movie in development all about how sideboob ruins families, or something. And that’s not just sideboob; it’s frontboob:

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WTF: Chloe Sevigny


In case you’re wondering if Chloe Sevigny ever wakes up and desperately misses her days of being a sister-wife on Big Love…

…the answer is obviously YES, YES, A THOUSAND TIMES YES.

[Photo: AKM/GSI]

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