Fug File: Scandal

Fug the Show: Scandal recap, season 4, episode 5


This show made a couple curious choices that make me wonder whether this episode and the one prior – or even the two prior — had the deck shuffled on them a bit. One: Later on, Liv wears the EXACT same outfit she had on midway through the previous one. Two: This show opens with a lengthy segment about the case-of-the-week from TWO weeks ago — The Statutory Rapist Who Did Not Kill Her Stepdaughter — and since NOBODY CARES about that storyline, and even Scandal itself seems ambivalent right now, that’s a very strange thing to do after a strong ending to last week. Now, some of the pieces this week ARE inextricable from each other, and maybe it was just a wardrobe accident or emergency, but I’d be curious to know what (if any) pieces got moved around in the edit. ** Two commenters brought up that maybe this was the result of cutting out the Stephen Collins guest stint? I had forgotten that was supposed to happen (although he was only recurring as a news anchor, so I don’t know if his part would have been THAT major?). He tweeted about it Sept. 23, so it might be a LITTLE tight for it to have been in these episodes, too, and yet anything is possible. Let’s dispose of it quickly and then get to the better stuff:

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As a refresher, they found video of Dead Stepdaughter being harassed in an elevator at her father’s workplace. Now Liv and Quinn are staking out the same workplace, I think — seriously, no one cares — and it’s only interesting because Quinn is a bit nasty to Olivia about why she’s suddenly in there doing the dirty work with them. Olivia responds, “My boyfriend is avoiding me.” Quinn gives her this look as if to say, “OMG, you too? PEOPLE AVOID OLIVIA POPE?” It made me laugh. It’s almost as if Quinn started to like her more in that second. And soon, they see a man appear and fight with a girl they recognize as Stepdaughter’s best friend. He smacks her. The girl reels backward but does not try to escape, grabbing instead at her face, and then the man executes her. They ID the man as a famously crooked ex-cop in D.C. who now does private security for firms like the one owned by Stepdaughter’s father, and the man menacingly tells the FIRST dead girl’s dad that he killed them BOTH to protect some key. But of course, the key is still missing. Why? Read More

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Fug the Show: Scandal recap, season 4, episode 4


Back in the Felicity days, did anyone ever imagine Scott Foley would have ANY career success threatening to snap people’s necks, and wantonly murdering, and walking casually away from a car he just blew up? Did anyone even imagine that until about halfway through his Scandal tenure?

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And yet here we are. Jake noticed a blinking red light underneath his car, so he turned tail and walked away and then unlocked it, which triggered the blast. Here is my question: B-Nefarious can do pretty much anything in the world and knows every secret there is, but no one there has figured out how to build a bomb without a crimson beacon of warning? Rethink yourselves, B-Cavalier.

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Fug the Show: Scandal recap, season 4, episode 3


As much as my relationship with this show is frequently one of frustration, there’s something soothing about the return to Scandal of the Week storylines, because it pushes (Un)B-Lievable stuff down and away from the fore. Of course, having said that, Portia de Rossi is stepping into that space and filling it with her own brand of being one scheme ahead of everyone, and while it’s nice to see a lady puppet master, it’s also a little exhausting to replace one shady behind-the-scenes operator with another.

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This week, Portia and the NRA honcho (played by Kyle Secor; I think he’s been on before?) are commiserating about Fitz’s insistence on gun control legislation, which is chapping the hide of her party’s extremist power players. She reassures him it isn’t going to pass, because she keeps all her schemes stashed in the hair that’s as tall as the Chrysler building. It’s like a head-purse full of plans.

incoming: mellie’s non-wine cardigan

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Fug the Show: Scandal recap, season 4, episode 2, “Stand and Clap”


Sometimes Scandal gets all hot for its own cuteness. And this week, in the midst of a montage about Mellie, we got this graphical collage of bad headlines:

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And, real talk, I would watch the hell out of that if Shondaland produced Mental Mellie and slid it into the 8 p.m. slot on Thursdays in place of Grey’s Anatomy, which I quit when I turned on the premiere and groaned OUT LOUD to my empty office at the mere sight of the interns. The issue being, of course, that I don’t think Mental Mellie the way we’d want to see it is an 8 p.m. show, but then again, Scandal isn’t a 9 p.m. show, really, and there it is anyway. Let’s just make it the 8 p.m. hour you ground your kids for watching.

We begin this hour with Olivia and Jake out for a jog:

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Is this supposed to be a metaphor — like, they’re next to each other, yet jogging in two different climates? Jake DOES keep insisting they’re not standing in the sun anymore, so maybe Olivia took that literally when she was getting dressed.

Jake announces, because everything boils down to sex, that he’s booked himself into a hotel room that she’s welcome to visit for booty calls. He actually says “booty call,” and he deploys it in the manner of someone who has just learned a groovy new term and wants to say it all the time. Booty call. Note, he does not invite her to spend time there. Just when she feels The Call of the Booty. Olivia protests this, but Jake is being super immature: If I recall correctly,  he all but whimpers that they’re not boyfriend-girlfriend, and now they’re back in D.C. in the real world, and he’s not going to sit around her apartment waiting for her to come home. Because God forbid he should be supportive and/or go get a goddamn job (seriously, if you are making me quote R. Kelly at you, then you have problems). Maybe HE should work at Olivia Pope & Associates, as one of hers is dead and the other is dead inside (read: working for Fitz).

Then Jake stops running and points out that Olivia’s political booty call is waiting. And no, it’s not Fitz.

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Fug the Show: Scandal Season 4 Premiere


The short recap is: The awesomeness of Abby’s hair is inversely proportionate to the impassioned grey turf that’s been implanted on Cyrus’s head, Mellie is handling her grief with Ugg Boots, and Olivia’s wine habit finally came back to bite her (but not in a way that ruined her wine cardigan, thank God).

Since the season three finale, when she jetted off with Jake in the wake of Fitz’s son’s death, Olivia has been slumming it in a putrid hellhole:

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She and Jake apparently took refuge on a mysterious uncharted island that’s equipped with deck chairs and a nice place to live and bang, and a dude who will bring them groceries and fine wine. It’s like the luxury resort version of the Dharma Initiative and its hatch.

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Oh, show. You’re so subtle. Although Where’d You Go, Bernadette? might have been more apt given the next shot:

get ready to go sunglasses shopping

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Fug the Clothing Line: Scandal for The Limited


Olivia Pope generally wears only pants, coats, wine cardigans, and boring colors. Three out of those four things are represented here. The one that’s missing may upset you. Hint: It’s the wine cardigan. I KNOW.

[Photos: Getty]

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