All righty, let’s see if we can figure out what from this show is going to make us insane this coming year. Exhibit A: This thing.
I can’t believe you didn’t comment on those platform-Crocs shoes/boots/monstrosities that many of the models were wearing.
Platform Gardening Shoes.
I was coming here to comment on the same thing. What. Is. Happening. With. Those. Shoes????!! WHY are the models wearing platform lug-soled duck shoes? I didn’t even mind the diagonal strap shoes, but those galoshes made me itch.
Me too. Plastic fringed bottom something clogs. I think they prove she is just effing with us.
Every pair of shoes in this show is AWFUL.
I am doing a separate shoe post, so I’m saving it.
Yes. They remind me of a squeegee on a floor scrubbing machine. FUG! All fug.
I saw the shoes in Number Four and couldn’t carry on.
That’s exactly where my brain exploded, too. SAS’s high fashion line? Flatform nursing shoes? Gaaak!
Oh, your comments are a thing of beauty – thanks for the laughs! The blue coat is the only thing I like here. Now could we talk for a moment about the most insane way to carry a handbag ever devised (thanks Posh)? Cute little bags and clutches are probably fun to carry around casually clamped to your hip, but not tote-sized bags, arrgh. I think we need to coin a term for this particular insanity.
The shoes were so hideous, I had trouble seeing the rest of the fug.
To paraphrase a line from Gilmore Girls, those shoes make my soul sore.
So sad you didn’t expand into a “sole” pun
Purple boob drapes. Then black boob drape. And the shoes are unspeakable. And even the one you thought was good, Heather? I’m chalking it up to Stockholm Syndrome.
Blue coat is truly delightful, witty, chic, flattering. I don’t even mind the grape jumpsuit that much — it reminds me pleasantly of Soul Train. Much of the rest is just wtf ugly. meanwhile, over at Celine, Phoebe Philo’s show was mostly charming, classy and modern looking.
While I don’t love the shoes, I don’t hate them either. I’ll take them over 5″ nosebleed stilettoes.
The coat in shot #15 just made me laugh. A coat only a shoplifter could love.
I knew this day would eventually come and now it has—Stella has broken me. I have run out of ways to express what a terrible “designer” she is and how she would have no career if her last name was Smith. Two or three cute things in a sea of fugly do not a professional collection make.
Yes. It rendered me speechless with fuggery.
The shoes. Dear God, the shoes.
I’m doing a Paris Fashion Week shoe piece so you’ll get to see them in close-up.
That’s OK. Spare us.
A fine collection of fancy sacks.
It’s like the “for female entities” equivalent to whatever sacks Justin Bieber is wearing.
I don’t think RiRi would go for #1. It doesn’t expose enough skin.
But the one you picked for Rooney Mara is not altogether unfortunate looking.
I’m waiting to see Vanessa Hudgens in #1.
Why? Why?? Why would someone who so obviously hates everything about the female form do this? I get it that a lot of designers seem to lack a realistic grasp of what the female form is actually like, but SMC is not just ignorant or unrealistic – she is on the warpath against women. GAAAHH
A very rich woman indulging herself.
I really have to agree with LoriK, if Stella’s last name was anything other than McCartney, you wouldn’t see these pitiful excuses for clothes on a catwalk.. They look amateurish, poorly designed and all in all just plain, well, fugly.
#14 screams SWINTON!
Im just going to go bang my head against a wall. And then maybe I’ll have poor enough taste that I can design clothes.
No, wait. My daddy isn’t rich. CRAP.
I tried to see what you liked about the shirt in slide 8, but aside from the basic idea of a black, subtly striped button down, I see nothing to like in its execution. It doesn’t fit the model at all, and in fact makes her look dumpy, which she surely isn’t. And the pants have discovered whole new dimensions of unflatteringness. I think you pegged it when you suggested this is the look we’ll see Stella herself in most.
My favorite comment has to be on slide 12; I didn’t get it at first, and then I remembered that Linda died of breast cancer. Yes. That is a crazy unflattering cut, and yet I fear this is the one we’ll see most of. (Enlarged, you can see that that’s a really cool fabric… with which Stella has done some really stupid things)
I think what I liked about it was: I was trying not to bitch about EVERYTHING because that can be boring to read. Heh.
You are being too kind. I am, frankly embarrassed for Stella; only the shoes made me laugh.
um, i kind of liked some of the shoes. like the maryjane thing with the diagonal strap? and i’m not against the croc clog platform thing either. just not in white.
also i really like that gray coat.
i sometimes wish you guys lived in the northeast so you could embrace your love of coats. i feel like i just take them for granted and should really try harder.
She needs to take up origami instead of doing fashion. Her use of structure and folds is really interesting but, good God, those clothes are unflattering to the female form.
(I wouldn’t mind having the lace numbers in my closet, though…)
The best thing about the entire slideshow, for me, had nothing to do with the photos. It was this:
“GAAAAAAAH AND THEN THEY MATED.”
I need to check what’s in my tea bag because I actually sorta liked the formal pajamas. Or maybe I just like the idea of formal pajamas. The two pantsuits and the last little dress are the only slides that didn’t make me groan. I’m going to take the shoes as a whimsical joke to entertain the audience and make them forget how bad the clothes are.
Maybe she was inspired by Maclemore’s “Thriftshop” song and raided her obese grandpa’s closet for ideas? Half of those outfits look like they’re in size XXL. NOT FLATTERING.
It is very interesting to me that the formally-trained (at a VERY good school) Stella McCartney doesn’t know how clothes work or what looks good on actual people; while the School of Spice alumna Victoria Beckham makes clothes that look nice and seem to function properly.
As we say in our trade, “you can make ‘em go to college but you can’t make ‘em think.”
With her money, I’m not clear why she was only able to buy three bolts of fabric. It seemed like everything was either cheap purple satin, black and white stripes, or that tone-on-tone black fabric.
She’s pregnant, either that or trying to get Kate Middleton’s baby bump swathed in Stella. Those designs are roomy and look comfortable. But so do sweat pants, and they’re less expensive.
Exactly! Some of these would make really interesting maternity wear.
I don’t like this collection.. there seems to be a lot of random placement of fabric that makes the outfits look a) like they don’t fit; b) hides the actual design of the garment and c) were pinned haphazardly by a blindfolded person.
Even the stuff that’s “good” is pretty problematic. That first coat has a gorgeous colour and shape (it’s reading purple to me?) but the way it closes so that the hem doesn’t meet itself properly in the front looks sloppy. And it’s obviously deliberate, because the pattern matches. Same with the Downton coat. So basically it’s fine so long as it’s perfectly fitted, but translate that to the red carpet (or the real world) and it’s going to look ghastly. And that last dress is terribly proportioned: waist’s too high, skirt’s too short, arms are too long.
As for the rest, “GAAAAAAAAH!” pretty much covers it. Thanks for the hilarious commentary. I cannot believe this woman still has a career.
and I thought I was over my gastrointestinal illness. Just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
The tone-on-tine upholstery like fabric looked good to me, although a sweetheart strapless would not be how I deploy it.
The rest are clown clothes, lacking only a round red nose accessory, because they’ve certainly got big clown shoes already.
I’d totally wear that first thing. Yeah, it’s kind of hideous… But in a cool, “jolie-laide” kind of way. It’s cool. I’m also digging the flatform shoes/boots! Comfy!
There are a lot of menswear references in this collection, which I think can be really sexy on the right woman.
When will the Kimye orgasm photo fall off the page? When? When? Whennnnnnn?
Her clothes look like things non-designers would design if they were pretending to be designers.
I did not look at the slide show because I wanted to spare my sanity. From the comments, it was a wise decision.
Most of these outfits look like when I layer a robe over my pajamas and then put on my gardening clogs to go get the paper in the morning. Seriously, I wouldn’t wear this stuff to the grocery store lest I be arrested for vagrancy.
They just read as she’s trying really hard to be Junya/Yohji/Rei, but doesn’t really understand what they’re doing, and is adding a misguided smattering of mall aesthetic. It’s like what you would get if you let a really earnest 12-year-old watch a lot of Japanese avant-garde fashion shows and then “design her own collection.”
I kind of like the pajama top, but the rest is a whole lot of bad crazy. Why can’t she do dark, interesting, concept- and possibly wearable/pretty?
The Dorothy Zbornak Funereal collection?
(Though Dorothy would have never worn those shoes, unless there was a platform-less sneaker version).
Dear Heather and Jessica,
If, for this year’s Fug Madness, you decide to have two categories (one for wearing monstrosities, one for designing them), I hereby nominate Stella McCartney for the latter.
^THIS is a brilliant idea. Fug Mad-Scientist-ness!
The gal with the purple sleeve-legs jumpsuit could be the back half of a purple pantomime horse.
Yesss! You’ve nailed it. Stella is a PECCABLE tailor.
Everything always looks sewn wrongly.
Could slide #4 kind-of explain the abomination that Chastain just wore? The V is inverted, but they could be related.
That was exactly my thought when I saw the v-shaped lace stuff in this collection, I wonder if Chastain’s hideous panty-pants were Stella?
She’s just messing with us. Right?
Haven’t seen the slideshow yet and I already HATE it!
“GAAAHHH! NO TANKS!” it is!
What kills me is the Garance Dore interview in which Stella McC came off as very bright and down to earth and CONCERNED about designing wearable clothing for regular women.
Where is THAT Stella? Cuz I don’t see her here.
I think I’m coming down with something because I kinda liked the purple thing. The first one, not the jumpsuit or the “NO TANKS!” caftan.
Love the “peccable” usage. It has a suitable ring of guilt to it.
I believe that, in England, you CAN be peccable.
Also, lapels amok! Whole huge swaths of lapels and collars amok! Badness! Words gone! Nooooo…..
I don’t expect fashion to be wearable or workable for a real person in the real world but, for cryin’ out loud: this is god-awful! I can see that some design elements have been employed in more than one garment, but given the range of garments and fabrics McCartney selected these 26 pieces are an incohesive and, at best, unattractive mess.
I can’t even believe I’m thinking this, much less typing it, but I actually prefer Kim Kardashian’s wardrobe this offal….
How is this her job??? That’s all I want to know. Blech.
That “NO TANKS” purple thing… it’s like a giant fish that is eating the model. Do you see it? But it’s not a cool-looking giant fish, it’s like a sloppy, loose-skinned, garishly-coloured fish. That fold of fabric that makes the “tail” and how it pulls the rest of the torso… just. Horrible.
I can understand high concept. I can understand deliberate “sloppiness.” But this reads as sloppiness that was supposed to be structure, and high concept that instead looks like it was sewn together from somebody’s dad’s used sports jerseys.
I feel unclean.
Ugly. And the shoes…I thought platform crocs as well. All around awful. I couldn’t even get through half because I hated it all.
How in the world is this ridiculously untalented so-called designer still in business?
Oh. Her last name.
Those turtlenecks: Now that she’s over 40 perhaps McCartney is feeling bad about her neck like Nora Ephron did? link
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