Fugs and Fabs: The Lone Ranger Premiere

Apparently, Disney invited everyone they could manage to kidnap from the ABC and/or ABC Family soundstages. Also, Johnny Depp looks normal, and Helena Bonham Carter ditched.

[Photos: Getty]

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Comments (81):

  1. Stefanie

    I’m still loving Julianne’s bob.

    • True_Blue

      Like her bob, too (although I suspect that having a chunk of hair in front of your eye will get old in a hurry). But the thing she’s wearing is making her look pear-shaped, giving her the illusion of bigger hips (who needs that?).

  2. A.J.

    I went to walk out the door the other day and thought to myself, “The GFY girls would say I need a bracelet with this.” So I went back in and put one on.

  3. Kate

    Is Joey Lawrence stealing clothes from Bieber’s wardrobe?

    • gryt

      He’s auditioning for a role where he’s supposed to be 19 (á la Joey on Friends). “S’up dude? S’up? That’s wack!!”

      • Kate

        I was hoping he was auditioning to replace the actual Justin Bieber, because people had grown tired of his twerpitude.

  4. Chasmosaur

    Ruth Wilson:

    Alice Morgan called. She totally disapproves of your outfit and lack of makeup. Perhaps you need some Idris Elba/Luther to highlight how gorgeous you are?

    • Sarah B

      I love Ruth Wilson so much, entirely based on her role in Luther. She deserves better clothes and makeup.

      • Rachael

        I think Ruth Wilson’s dress with that wackadoo ruffle makes it look like her head is about to eaten by a clam shell. And, strangely, I love it.

  5. Jules

    Um, Joey Lawrence, you are 37 YEARS OLD. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? (For the record, I had to look up his age. I may know all the birth dates of Duran Duran, but I’m not claiming Joey Lawrence. I just knew he was too old for this get up.)

    • kfletch

      Once you’ve had an eye lift, it’s time to turn the hat back around.

      •  Niao

        Girl, THIS. This comment right here just gave me life for the rest of the day.

  6. Jenny

    Beckett needs a bracelet!

    • crookedE

      I cannot for the life of me figure out why she is not better-dressed. EVER. She is so gorgeous! Such a waste of bone structure.

  7. qwertygirl

    Some of this looks like the invitation offered a prize for the weirdest outfit. And why are people wearing floor length evening gowns if it’s a Saturday afternoon premier? Call me old fashioned, but floor length is for evening. I admit it, I’m a bit of a fuddy duddy.

  8. Beth

    Are we all sure that’s really Joey Lawrence? I mean…seriously, are we sure?

    • Seamyst

      I just Google Imaged him, because I was seriously wondering the same thing, and… it appears to really be him. I had a HYOOJ crush on him in the mid-90s and looking at him now…. hmm. If he took off that repulsive cap and actually wore nice clothes, I think he might still be cute. I like his bone structure, anyway.

      •  Noodle

        He IS still cute. Not in that hat, clearly, but in general. Joey Lawrence!

  9. Kitty

    Boring Unnecessary Nude Shoes (that’s BUNS for those scoring at home) are spreading so quickly, they’ve already arrived in the sleepiest of midwestern cities.

    I went to a wedding this weekend and from the ankles up, the frocks were stylish and summery. So cute, so covet-able! From the ankles down — an endless sea of BUNS. Even the bride and bridesmaids weren’t immune. Seriously, SO MANY NUDE SHOES drabbing down SO MANY PERFECT DRESSES.

    It was so rampant as to be … kind of eerie. No matter how fashionable, how popular, specific items are never so widespread and homogenous. (Outside of junior high, that is.)

    (Oh, and while dancing a particularly festive Chicken Dance, a bridesmaid in BUNS stepped on my foot, do you suppose I’ve been infected?)

    • Carolina Girl

      Perhaps there should be a BUNS telethon to raise money to help all the confused, fashion-illiterate starlets who insist on putting Boring Unnecessary Nude Shoes with everything. We could do it over the radio, like those NPR fund raising drives where Ira Glass guilt trips you into contributing.

  10. Kristin

    Re: Stana.

    In addition to a bracelet, she needs perhaps a size up (for length) and to give me her shoes.

    •  HelenBackAgain

      She needs an entirely different dress. That one makes her look like a block.

    • Aphy

      A better accessory would be Nathan Fillion. Stana is shown at all these premieres and openings, can’t the execs at ABC do me a solid and have him show up?!

    • Jeanette

      I was thinking also perhaps a belt to define her waist?

  11. Claire1

    So we took a Disney vaycay last week ( missed all of this hooplah, thank goodness) and there was this adorable young woman posing on the “boardwalk” in DCA and an older woman was taking her picture….
    I could have sworn it was Emma Roberts…except…
    She was wearing the most adorable chocolate sundress with cream polka dots and had a cream sun hat and matching shoes ( to die for)….. A D O R A B L E!
    then I realized it wasn’t Emma at all….because of the perfect clothing choices.

    •  HelenBackAgain

      Yeah, couldn’t be. I mean, she’s wearing a child’s undershirt here, and seems to think that’s fine.

  12.  maryloubethune

    The title should be : Pretty people looking poorly. What it their problem?

  13.  Vandalfan

    Peta and her boobular eyebrows just beamed in from the Star Ship Enterprise.

    And that has GOT to be a McCartney on poor JHough.

  14. Anita

    I see an elephant face on Julianne’s torso: her boobs are the eyes, and the trunk travels down her sternum. Despite my great love of animals, this makes this outfit no less hideous to me.

    Replace Krysten Ritter’s yellow peplum with a yellow belt and she’s good to go (though the unfortunate placement of the decor on the red carpet makes it look like she’s sprouting feathers from her backside.)

  15. MG

    Christian S. indeed plays one of Bella’s friends, the one without the hidden agenda. She is the one that Bella tells to be strong and confident, blah blah, and should ask out the guy herself.

    • Not telling

      Angela. I shouldn’t know this but I do, hence the anonymous name. :0)

  16. feendog

    I’m sorry, Christian’s dress is not ok. Is that castles and unicorns? Heavy equipment? Marine life?

  17. TonyG

    Heavens to murgatroyd (sorry, I couldn’t resist), Peta! That outfit is very Trekkie, though those shoes are specifically forbidden by the Starfleet Academy ensign dress code.

    • Edith

      Exit! Stage left!

      I have no idea who Peta Murgatroyd is, but the fact that Jessica didn’t make the Snagglepuss reference disappoints me deeply. Sometimes, being hacky is the RIGHT thing to do.

    • Kris

      There is something really wrong with her pants. They make her knees like they’re on backwards.

    • jenelope

      Well, somebody had to say it!

    • esther p.

      that’s the first thing i thought of. i’m glad i’m not the only one with that floating around in their noggin. :)

  18. Eliza Bennett

    I was a lot more excited about this post when I thought it said “Power Ranger Premiere.”
    I love Ritter’s dress! LOVE it. Stana needs a belt as well as a bracelet.

  19. Katie

    whoawhoawhoa – in the obviously most important statement of all the captions – TEAM MELLIE? But why?

    It’s not even that I’m disgusted when she goes all political animal (all of them, on all of the teams, do that), and it’s not that I’m normally opposed to people who chose each other in marriage sticking it out, and it does seem that she really loves him. But I don’t believe he loves her. And only bad things lie the way of one-sided relationships. Y’know? I need someone to explain to me why I should be team Mellie.

    • Jessica

      Well, it was mostly just me being dramatic.

      BUT I really dislike Fitz. He’s like the world’s worst president — at least Derek Shepard still managed to get in ground breaking surgeries around his romantic drama, but Fitz seriously seems to spend all his time looking out the window — and he also is kind of a stalker. PLUS, he totally goes all Mopey McSadSack when things go wrong, when at least Mellie is proactive. I feel like he makes terrible choices and does awful things and they’re presented as romantic (because Shonda has weird, weird ideas about how men should behave).

      I am actually Team Olivia Pope, too, but I kind of wish they’d BOTH realize that while Fitz is hot, they can do way better. I wish they would band together for the good, frankly. Mellie would fit right in at Olivia Pope Associates in an alternate universe.

      • Leelee

        YES to all of the above.
        Fitz is a terrible husband, a creepy boyfriend, and a sucky president. Not to mention his eyebrows are an entirely different colour to his hair. Really, isn’t that the worst crime of all?

        In other news, Bellamy Young looks absolutely perfect here, AND is wearing a bracelet. I am deeply envious of her ability to wear that shade and not look like a radioactive banana.

        •  Louise

          Fitz is a certified Creeper. Can’t stand him. I like Mellie a lot. Just like her, I was obsessed with a book about Dolly Madison when I was a young girl. Also, #teamScottFoley.

          • Amberoni13

            I’m Team nobody on that show – they all have issues – but I love the show. Mellie freaks the hell outta me. I’m always convinced she Knows, and at least partly convinced she ordered the hit on pregnant Paris.

      • Katie

        I can totally get behind that: Team Mellie, Team Olivia Pope, Team not-Fitz. I misunderstood it for the normal love triangle jockeying. I would be so down for the storyline wherein they both ditch him and Olivia runs Mellie’s gubernatorial campaign or something.

        Re: whether he’s a good president – I thought I saw an interview with Shonda where she said she liked to imagine the show only capture the 5% of the president’s life which is totally personal and salacious, and the rest of the time he’s wrangling Congress and running the country. Maybe she wants to differentiate the show from the more policy-oriented (awesomely so) West Wing. But I think it would go a long way to audience buy-in for Fitz if we saw him do something presidential, or even remotely good-hearted, once in a while.

        But omg, re: Fitz is a creeper, team Scott Foley, is Captain Ballard NOT a creeper?

        • googler

          I think Olivia and Mellie should ditch Fitz, Olivia gets behind Mellie’s presidential campaign, and Olivia and Cyrus’s husband move in together and become roommates. You KNOW they would have so much fun with each other’s wardrobes.

      • Katie

        I think my reply comment got eaten by the filters. If we are Team Mellie AND Team Olivia Pope and Team not-Fitz, then I am on board. I would be so down with a storyline where they both ditch him and Olivia runs Mellie’s gubernatorial campaign.

        On the subject of Fitz as prez, though, I heard Shonda said she imagined his professional duties happened offscreen, and the show is just about the juicy personal stuff. It would go a long way for me, though, in buying him as a romantic interest if he were also better at his job (like Olivia is good at her job).

        And for the Scott Foley supporter who thinks Fitz is a creep – aren’t Captain Ballard’s actions, like, textbook creep?

        Thank you for indulging me in this extreme tangent to Scandal-land! I really do like Bellamy Young’s look.

  20. Jenz

    How old is Ruth Wilson? That dress ages her.

    • Kristin

      Thirty-one! You’re certainly right, I thought she was fifteen years older from that picture.

  21. Amalia

    I’d like a closer look at the peasant-y dress worn by the woman striding through the background of Julianne’s pic. She may be winning it. Also, Audrina’s shoes make her feet look like giant flippers – I say that with sympathy, because that style of ankle strap does me no favors either.

  22. Edith

    How is no one commenting on Johnny Depp?!? He got a haircut! He’s wearing a suit! And, for the first time in YEARS, he doesn’t look as if he smells bad! Yaaaaaaaay!

    That said, the LAST thing he needs is to hang out with GOOP and Madonna – they’d only reinforce one another’s faux-British speak.

    • Lucasta

      I always feel like I have to defend Madonna etc when this comes up because some people (like me) are just terrible, terrible accent chameleons and unconsciously pick up the accent if they spend enough time around it. I grew up in the American Midwest but drop me in Galway or Savannah or Perth and within hours I will sound like I am trying my hardest to fake being a local (and failing miserably) and won’t even be AWARE of it. It’s brutal.

      I kind of wonder if Joey Lawrence lost a bet.

      • Amberoni13

        Oh yes. I grew up in west Texas, one of my best friends had a mom from London (who I had to consciously not offend with my newly acquired accent ALL THE TIME), and my favorite college professor was from South Chicago. THEN I moved to Montana for a year (for people who don’t know that accent, there was alot of Canadian going on, eh), Utah (Oh My Heck), Georgia (the rural parts, even), and back to Utah. When not around people with strong accents, I have no accent at all – I seriously sound like a network news anchor.

        That said, I still give no slack to Madonna, who blows off the questions with either an attitude that she has somehow earned her new accent or looks offended like she’s always talked like this, what? Goop I forgive because of an ancient and hilarious opening for SNL she did where she totally mocked her occasional accent. Depp has lived abroad so long, I kind of forgive it. And… he’s just odd.

        • Guerra

          This! I totally adopt people’s accents without noticing. The worst thing is my husbands south American with a really really strong accent. We live in Australia, so people constantly ask were I’m from. I’m Australian. How embarrassing!! Lol

  23. strah

    -Julianne would look +10 cuter wearing the dress of the woman walking behind her instead of that awful print pantsuit.

    -Even toned down Johnny Depp has on 6 rings and 5 necklaces (under his shirt) in addition to the crotch necklaces. Maybe he has an accessory addiction?

    -I seriously thought Joey Lawrence had a hard-hat on. If he needed a hat there were so many other choices. The rest of it… I don’t even know.

    -It kind of looks like Krysten Ritter has a purse in one hand and a plant in the other. I would like the dress much more without the yellow ruffle.

  24. Rowynn

    Good grief, check out the background guy just to the left of Audrina Patridge’s left elbow. Those are some serious whiskers.

  25.  Louise

    Sweet Baby Carrots, Joey Lawrence looks like a waxed figure.

  26.  HelenBackAgain

    This is just all very weird. Even the outfits that look good, I think seem really event-inappropriate.

    The only one who nailed it is Armie Hammer.

  27. kate

    Is JHough’s jumpsuit from the same collection as Pippa Middleton’s dress from the hogwarts wedding earlier?


  28. Christine

    Julianne Hough’s pantsuit looks just like Johnny Depp in the previews for this movie- I keep thinking I see his face with his war paint or whatever- especially the eyes on the boobs. It’s pretty creepy, but spot on if she was trying to pay an homage to the movie

  29. akay

    I don’t know … while it’s better than Johnny Depp’s usual tatters, now he looks like he’s being styled by Mickey Rourke.


  30. Mina

    Emma Roberts looks like she let F21 dress her for this event.

  31. Emily Houlis

    Has Joey Lawrence had some work done? He looks a little… off.

  32. Jen Dee

    What Stana Katic needs is for you to spell her name right!

  33. stephasaurus

    ew. now i know what it would look like if ryan seacrest and justin beiber could make a baby together. so gross.

  34. Guerra

    Joey Lawrences hat took him straight to doucheville

  35. Stacie

    Emma Roberts has obviously robbed K-Stew’s wardrobe. Meh.

  36. Eirwen

    Stana’s dress is such a bad shape on her- makes her look linebackerish. She’s worn fab long evening gowns in Castle- red is great on her. Glad to see a dapper Depp though!

  37. JRS

    Could you please spell Stana Katic’s name right? It’s not that difficult. And by the way, she looks fantastic in that dress.

  38. liz

    Armie Hammer is adorable in that suit. Johnny Depp is fine, but can we talk about his costume for this movie? Seriously, it would make the “Indian” in the Village People jealous. The bird on his head reminds me of Snape’s get up during the whole “Riddikulus” incident. It’s just a few thoughtless clicks toward Native American on the Captain Jack Sparrow scale of deeply cliched costume choices. Thank you for listening.

  39. KDenae

    Okay Scandal fans – help me out here… Every time I see Bellamy Young I always have this weird sense of déjà vu, or at the very least, a case of the confuseds…because my brain wants to make her blonde! Not like “she needs a few face framing highlights to warm up her complexion.” I see her face and my brain, while flopping the image right-side up from my eyeballs (it’s science,) makes her Monroe in “Gentlemen Prefer Blondes” blonde. Why? Is there a reason? I’ve spent more time contemplating this than I would care to admit.

  40. Janice

    Julianne Hough came dressed as the lone range.

  41. Victoria Lewis

    It totally amuses me when Jessica says she secretly loves a neck ruffle, because 1.) it’s most definitely not a secret anymore and 2.) I am nothing if not a lover of anything Elizabethan and/or Shakespearian so I fully support love of neck ruffles, secret or not.