Well. How to put this…. These two have certainly looked better.
Josh Duhamel looks like he was chipped off the underside of one of Ashton Kutcher’s feet after a three-day tequila fest, and Fergie just seems… off. Not to be all Womb Whisperer again, but I’m totally going to be all Womb Whisperer again: I remember correctly guessing Nina Garcia’s second pregnancy just from watching her judge an episode of Project Runway in which it looked like she was trying very hard not to vomit all over everyone’s shoes, and looking back, it turns out she would’ve indeed been in her first trimester. And Fergie has a similar expression on her face (though perhaps her husband also smells like stale tequila and Kutcher toe jam), and you’ll note her shoes are a) vomit-proof patent leather, and b) a lot more sensible than usual. A lot. Do with that what you will.
I know, I’m sorry, Fergie. I always feel weird speculating, because that’s so personal. But GFY sits at the intersection of fashion and the rumor mill, and often one informs the other, so we’re just kind of covering our bases — perhaps sloppily and with a lot of tangents and protruberant lumpy bits, sure, but that’s apt because it echoes the way that dress is covering your body. It’s as if the thing wants to be so wacky that we can’t bring ourselves to look anywhere near the Business Center, and yet, we can’t look anywhere BUT there, because I swear this thing is crinkling like she just got punched in the G-spot. Ow. In conclusion, I hope whatever she wants to be happening with her womb is happening safely and with a minimum of puke, and that either way, she puts down the hip visors next time and walks away.