Fugger: Thomas Jane

Emmy Awards Man Fugs and Fabs


I’m sorry, Fug Nation. None of our subscriptions had any photos of the Cumberbatch. Will you accept Thomas Jane looking like a lunatic as a peace offering?

… No? Okay, then there’s a treat for you at the end. Which is working correctly now that said treat is placed where I INTENDED it to be placed. Sigh. Technology.

[Photos: Getty]

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Golden Globes CRAZY Carpet: Thomas Jane


When Thomas Jane popped up on TV last night, I must admit that I screamed at Heather, “OH MY GOD HEATHER HEATHER THOMAS JANE LOOK HEATHER LOOK AT WHAT THOMAS JANE IS WEARING LOOK:”

He’s straight out of Bonanza, you guys!

But don’t worry. I know what you really want to know. Is he wearing shoes? Behold:

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WTF-ly Played, Thomas Jane


We need to talk about what’s going on with Thomas Jane.

After the Chicken Feet Incident — which, not for nothing, I am taking personally, as I personally happen to have a phobia of chicken feet (much as Tyra has a crippling phobia of dolphins, except not dumb) — now Jane is back to no shoes at all. This is at The Grove, LA’s HIGHLY trafficked out-door mall (also one of the best places in town to spot a celeb, if you want to. I once saw Luis from Passions at the Crate and Barrel there, and had to sit down, he looked so hot in person. And yes, if you read Spoiled, that IS in the book. I also was once walking behind two girls and thought, “those two girls TOTALLY think they’re on The Hills” and when I passed them, I realized it was Lauren Conrad and Lo Bosworth. Anyway: just a tip in case you’re coming for a visit). Walking there barefoot is essentially really gross.  It’s like going barefoot in Times Square. And listen, I am PRO BARE FEET (barefootedness?). I am barefoot right now. I never wear shoes at home. My living room rug is littered with the shoes I take off the moment I walk in the door! I LOVE BARE FEET. But this is getting f$@#!ing weird, man.

Do we think this is why he and Patricia Arquette broke up?

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Emmy Awards Scrolldown Well Fugged: Thomas Jane


I can’t decide if Thomas Jane is a comedic genius, or if he’s lost his mind. Because he has gone from wearing no shoes at all…

… to poultry feet. I am pretty sure this has something to do with why the chicken crossed the road; I just can’t decide if its family should be pressing criminal charges.

[Photo: Pacific Coast News]

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Fungng


Okay, dude. Enough is enough.

If I were any event organizer inviting Thomas Jane to my party, I would litter the floor with debris — splinters, thumbtacks — so as to teach the man the lesson that SHOES ARE FOR WHEN YOU ARE OUT IN THE WORLD.

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Well Played, Considering…Let’s Just Say, PLAYED: Thomas Jane


THOMAS JANE: No, it’s just that my manager told me if I went barefoot at a red-carpet event one more time, she’d fire me. I’ve got bills to pay too, you know? But she didn’t say ANYTHING about too-tight pants. GOTCHA!

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