Fugger: Rooney Mara

Fug or Fab: Rooney Mara in Giambattista Valli Couture

I just keep imagining the conversations between Rooney Mara’s stylist, and that stylist’s assistant, wherein the assistant keeps holding up, say, a green dress with a questioning expression, and the stylist sighs, “No. You know she’ll only wear black or white. I know. I know. But I’ve given up. She’s been utterly monochrome for years now.” So I’ve reached the point where I don’t know if I think something is unsuccessful in general, or just BORING:

'Pan' New York Premiere

I mean, whatever.  Yeah, it’s a backwards apron dress too timid to go full mullet on us:

Celebrities Attend The Premiere Of PAN

But I think I would have liked it on Emma Watson.

Here is the thing, and this might sound a little radical, but bear with me: Her black-and/or-white only wardrobe is slowly making Rooney feel like a celebrity non-entity to me. She hasn’t done enough big projects (especially recently), nor done enough press, to make a real impression on 80% of the world. We know who she is, but we’re paying attention. For most movie goers, she is — despite an Oscar nomination! — barely even a household name. Which, look, I don’t know her life and maybe what she really wants is to do Chekhov in tiny, obscure places forever and God speed, if so. I doubt it, though; Pan looks like a mess from the ads, but a Peter Pan adaptation always has the potential of being a very commercial project, and obviously so was Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. But when you’re consistently presenting yourself in black and white at press events and on red carpets, you start to train the on-looker’s eye to just flicker past you — we respond to color — and there are ten thousand tiny serious brunette actresses in the world. Now is not the time to be subtly, consistently inducing the movie-ticket-buying public to pay you no mind. Look, I’m not arguing that she needs to pop up at the next photocall in a red tube top for attention. But I think these press events are actually very smart ways for actresses to introduce themselves to the audience, or to remind us that we like them, or to catch our attention — take Lily James’s great press tour for Cinderella, for example. There is absolutely a way for her to be true to her personal style — which is a little goth, a little quirky, a bit what Vogue would call “directional” — without it making people subconsciously tune her out. So I guess that what I’m saying is, I’m starting to worry about Rooney Mara’s career, and, in short: maybe try blue next time?

[Photos: Fame/Flynet]


WTF: Rooney Mara in Givenchy Couture

Something about the setting of this photo makes her look as if she’s the hostess at a tiki restaurant, waiting to escort you to your table:

Celebrities At The Premiere Of 'Pan'

And PRAYING for the day that her manager gets over this bizarre ruffled shower curtain fetish.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]


Cannes Fugs and Fabs and Ass Grabs: Cate Blanchett and Rooney Mara

I just thought you might want to open the day with a dash of elegance, before we dip into the muck of the Billboard Music Awards.

[Photos: Getty]


The Girl with the Fug Tattoo: Rooney Mara

Well, the good news is that her body survived the shark attack:


Even if her tunic did not.

[Photo: Getty]


Fugs and Fabs: Celebs at the Cartier Women Who Dare Party

From the crazy (Erin Wasson) to the sublime (Christy Turlington).

[Photos: Splash]


Fugs and Fabs: Rooney Mara

This post is a Tale of Two Very Different Looks. This first is CLASSIC Rooney Mara:

Rooney Mara arrives at the premiere of "Trash" during Rome Film Festival **USA ONLY**

Weird, dark,  bare-midriff-ed, unflattering in an intentional, expensive-looking way. Sort of…Trapped in A Dragon Tattoo. If someone asked me to predict what Rooney Mara would wear to any given red carpet, this would be close enough.

Her photocall look, on the other hand, is in many ways a far, far better thing:

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Cannes Fugs Except For Lupita: The Calvin Klein Party

That sensation you feel is the Met Ball nasty-funk being washed off you with the most luxurious of shampoos.

[Photos: Getty]