Fug File: Valentino

Couture Week Fugs and Fabs: Valentino


My eyes are starting to cross.

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Paris Fugshion Week: Valentino


Subtitled What That New CW Show About Mary, Queen of Scots, Is Really Sad It Can’t Afford.

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Couture Week Fugs and Fabs: Valentino


This show gave me whiplash. One minute you’re in sensible wartime travelwear, and then suddenly it’s crotches all over town.

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Cannes Fabs and Feh: Zoe Saldana


When this was shown during Paris Fashion Week, I wrote that it was gorgeous but “a bit eau de pinafore,” and that I’d be curious to see if it worked in real life (read: the red carpet, which is the realest context any of these things ever see). Well, curiosity sated. Happily. (Mostly.)

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Met Ball Fug or Fine Carpet: Gwyneth Paltrow


At least GOOP admitted she wasn’t even trying to go punk. You might ask, “Why even go then?” But you probably don’t turn down a Met Ball invitation. Especially if you’re Gwyneth Paltrow, you’ve got a movie out and a new cookbook, and you REALLY REALLY need to make up for last year’s hideous Prada apron with pockets that were constellations of horror.

In fact, even thematically, this feels like what she SHOULD have worn last year, given the Schiaparelli theme and the fact that pink was one of Elsa’s signature colors. It’s like her Step One of Fug’s Non-Anonymous was to make a visual apology for not paying any attention to the Prada until it was too late. But I’m not entirely sure this works on any other level — the cut is almost aggressively plain except for the strip of illusion netting, as if she used up all her wackadoo mojo on the Iron Man 3 events and this was all she could handle. I might have liked it better if it went bare instead of with sternum hose. And I ALSO think that, even though Gwyneth’s People Magazine Most Beautiful face is indeed great, maybe she needed something more up there than to look like she’s ditching out on the gala in ten minutes to go to the gym. Or punking out on it, I guess, which… how many times will we use THAT pun today?

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Met Gala Well Played, Anne Hathaway


Apparently, I like everything Anne Hathaway is doing with her hair lately, because I was totally into the short hair, and I ALSO like the blonde:

This Valentino is from 1992 — two years prior to Elizabeth Hurley’s infamous Versace safety pin dress — and I think it actually really, really works on her. Unlike a lot of the more successful OTT outfits from this event, it’s not TOTALLY event-specific. I mean, it’s punk-ISH and it’s totally appropriate, but if she had worn this to, like, the BAFTAs, I probably would not have burst into angry flames. As it is, I actually think this is great on her. Anne’s big problem can be traced back to the fact that she comes across as a TOTAL try-hard, and this is trying just hard enough. It’s actually kind of hot. And that is a sentence I have NEVER SAID ABOUT ANNE HATHAWAY EVER. Can we blame the blonde hair?

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