YOU ARE NOT ASHANTI. Nor should you strive to be.
Love, The Fug Girls
I hate this dress and it’s not doing her legs any favours. But it is very on the nose for her Beyonce persona (as opposed to the person she appears to be in her Tumblr, which is a very regular kind of girl – except with lots and LOTs of money.)
I agree, makes her legs look like tree trunks, and is just tacky in general.
I could not be any more sick of this woman and her “post-baby” body.
I used to think Beyonce was above all the attention whoring, but the past few months have proven she can whore with the best of them.
Hangin’ with Gwynnie probably isn’t helping.
Exactly. “Post-baby” body. So you bought three pairs of spanx and wore them all at once. Woo. Hoo.
Never being pregnant helps a lot with the “post baby body”.
Girl. No. Stop this foolishness.
That bodysuit is the work of Satan. As is the rest of this dress. I am so over the Muppet-train fishtail – there were like fifteen of them last night.
Seriously–no matter how fancy these sheer dresses are (and I’m sure this one cost more than my house) the bodysuits always look cheap and terrible.
It’s kind of like looking at Morticia Addams’ latest x-ray exam.
There is something so very wrong when someone as pretty as Beyonce looks as odd as she does in that last picture.
She really needs to dial it down. I don’t need to see all that.
My god! This is so ugly!!!!!
Did she and her Most Beautiful Publicity Team part ways? This is a disaster, and it’s dragging her down instead of her elevating the dress. Terrible all around. Or, maybe it’s a stunt to launch Solange into something new, since Solange looks about ten million times better than B.
I know. Solange looked awesome-sauce.
Solange was perfection! I am having a love affair with yellow.
What was the theme to this year’s ball? I can’t believe the levels of fug so far.
“Schiaparelli and Prada: Impossible Conversations” It’s their latest exhibit.
Whoa, that’s a whole lotta dress AND so much leg peeking through.
Looking at her bod, it’s hard to believe she just had a baby (IYKWIMAITYD).
I know this is not an unfug it up… But, what if the underlay was the same purple color, and included a skirt, too. Wouldn’t it be at least a little bit better? Kooky with the muppet hair, sure, but I can tolerate some muppet hair at the Met Ball.
Oh I like that – it would definitely be an improvement!
While I enjoy that she celebrates her (fab) figure at an event which is presumably dripping with uber-thin models… This is not the way.
It looks like a Fraggle got skinned.
I’m pretty sure her midriff is the face of Satan himself, I’m seeing eyes people, EYES! And I’m sure they just blinked.
I hated this dress. I thought when she climbed the stairs we might get an unfettered view of the childbirth zone. Yes, that’s the politest way I could put it.
My god yes. All I could imagine was Jay-z cringing with the awkwardness.
I sorta like the muppet skirt but it’s probably because I like purple. The rest is a disaster.
This is wrong on so many levels – from the total transparency to the visible undergarment masquerading as a liner. Also she looks like she’s 10 seconds from exploding out of it.
Aw, she actually seems uncomfortable in it, too. She’s gripping her thighs in that way you do when you don’t want people to look at the actual contour of your thighs.
She _always_ stands with her hands placed thus. It’s like she learned posing from her Barbie doll.
I think that from the ankles down, it is cool & interesting but the rest, I just can’t deal.
” from the ankles down”… *splutter*
Well played Miss, well played!
do you know someone actually put this on a best-dressed list? arrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.
if you can see the most beautiful ass-cleavage in the world as she’s going up the stairs (and oh yes, someone did photograph that) it is officially a DISASTER. even without the combover strands on the skirt.
PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAKE IT STOP.
I am often vehemently appreciative of weird, serious gowns (notably the Gothic masterpiece y’all fugged Christina Ricci for last year), but this thing is just a fancy stack of problems. Beyonce is sort of in the Gwyneth category for me, because she has a stunning figure, a beautiful face, and a visible sense of herself and what she likes. She can therefore get away with a lot. Can’t get away with this, though. The weird skintone mismatch created by the bodysuit! All the oddly-handled textures! The desperate sheerness! DISLIKE.
STOP WITH THE TRANSPARENT DRESSES ALREADY!!!!!!
These lace gowns are really difficult to wear and I’ve noticed few women look good in them. In this photo Beyonce appears to be standing on a purple shag bathroom rug along with the gown seeming to not fit quite right.
Wait…I watched the entire live feed and yet somehow missed Beyonce? Or did I just repress this dress from my memory?
There are probably like 30 naked ostriches somewhere. Beyonce can usually do no wrong, but this is WRONG!
How Do I Hate Thee, Beyonce’s Dress? Let me count the ways:
MuppetHyde (like Nauga of the same genus, but not from a rusting industrial town in Connecticut)
I can understand wanting to bring it at the Met Ball, but the “it” in question shouldn’t be “F.U.G.L.Y.” Badly done, Bey. Badly done.
I think that is someone crouching down behind her in that last one… regardless, she is so beautiful – that looks like some cracked out thing her mother either made or picked out for her.
This just SCREAMS “look at my post baby bod” with all its tightness, transparency and her posing with her hands on her hips all the time. While the met ball may not be the occasion for subtlety and Bey not the person for it, this is just too “in your face”. Can she even breathe in it? Love her face/make-up and hair, though.
I’m looking at the main picture and thinking this is bad, and there is a dangling thing between her legs, but it seemed like a lot of hate coming from the commenters. Then I clicked on the rear-view photos. Wow, of all the women there, you wouldn’t expect Beyonce to wear something the screamed “DESPERATION”, which this did, in ALL CAPS. Terrible.
This is nothing short of awful. The bottom part looks like a freaking bath mat.
I can only think of webs, muppets and ostriches. I am not thinking “great body” which is obvisouly what she has and what she wants us thinking. Wait up, your baby was just born. You have time, and are already in great shape.
Part of my beef with the dress is the color of the nude bodysuit under it – it’s just wrong for her skin tone. Instead of making her look nude, she looks like she’s wearing spanx. Nothing against spanx, but…
Maybe those ARE her spanx!
Also, does she have a large jewel hanging down from her lady bits?
The dress is just nasty. And she’s not standing in the corner, she’s sitting in a chair. But still fierce!
If the dress were opaque, I’d love it… and she’s looking more and more like Halle Berry (which is a very, very good thing)
Is that a heart shaped thing of lace in the coochie area? With a jewel hanging off of it?
The train looks like a purple shag rug out of somebody’s bath room in the 1970′s.
It looks so itchy.
All I know is, if you sprayed Weed-B-Gon on that dress Beyonce would be starkers.
I think I can seee…To the left, to the left, everything she has in HER box to the left.
thanks. so much. for that. I sang it. *bangs head on desk*
hahahaha – what an icky dress…
I am SO SO SORRY. It was the first thing that popped into my head. Momma always said I should think before I speak. And if it’s any consolation – I did the same thing the rest of the day.
Kind of pathetic. Good call on the Ashanti nod. I thought Gaga. Same dif. Bad on pretty much every level – in fact, I can’t pick just one thing to make as the worst of all the things wrong with this.
I’m just glad she didn’t have to be lock-stepped up the stairs this year.
This dress is just ridiculous, and it looks even worse with the way she’s standing. I know she usually poses like that, with her hands on her hips, but her arms look like creepy, barely-bent Barbie arms and it’s freaking me out.
So gorgeous from the neck up, too bad that’s wasted on this awful dress.
Freadful on the arms, dreadful on the body, too much showing, I’m fed up of sheer dresses, and the purple bottom looks like bathroom carpet. Dreadful. Such a shame.
I hate the dress, but really maybe my opinion is colored by my deeper hatred of her for looking like that just months after having a baby. If I compare that to how I looked and felt after a baby I truly feel like a cockroach. How is that humanly possible?
Don’t worry, she didn’t carry that baby. You don’t have to feel like a cockroach.
Trying way too hard.
The way she’s posing in ALL the pictures reminds me of Barbie. I don’t like it.
I think the peach colored body suit underneath is the worst part. I think if it had not been so see-through it might have been ok.
This dress deserves to be burned at the stake. I want full out, “The Crucible” style burnage.
I will focus on the fact that Solange salvaged the family by looking AMAZING at the Met.
Somehow this manages to stumpify her completely. It is a crime against reason and humanity to make Bey look this bad! Thankfully her face is as stunningly gorgeous as ever.
This gown is just over the top ridiculous. All of these gowns that are sooo long and soooo complicated to wear just begs the question of what happens if the wearer needs to visit the ladies room? Do you take a skirt wrangler along with you to help? I can’t imagine the scene in the stalls with lace and tulle and feathers being hoisted out of the way! Or do they just not eat or drink all night to avoid that situation??
I Love Bey…..but I HATE this….
How full of yourself do you have to be to wear a dress like this?
The question has been running through my mind all morning. As with Gwyneth’s dress, I am annoyed by this one as well.
Her face is, as usual, lovely, especially with the toned down make-up. And at least she didn’t need to be carried up the stairs this year? I can’t think of anything else positive to say about the dress.
A t-shirt and jeans would look better than this unconscionable mess.
So would SWEATPANTS AND FLIPFLOPS.
Her stiff hands-on-hips-pose is hilarious, though.
The dress is quite hideous and it does no justice to her body. She is BE-FREAKING-YONCE. She doesn’t need muppet hair and a transparent dress to look good. This sheer trend needs to go.
An excellent, spot-on analysis.
Could you please explain the steak comment to my husband? If I don’t want any kind of sauce on it, I’m not being bland or picky. It’s a compliment. It means you picked an excellent cut of meat and grilled it to perfection so that its natural flavor is all I need.
This was horrible for her, and I’m really mad that somebody killed Snuffleupagus to hot glue to Bey’s very long-torsoed black-beaded skeleton “dress”.
You can’t say that bottom part does not look like a pelvis!!
This dress screams:
1- I just had a baby and paid a trainer mega bucks so that I could fit in this excuse of a dress.
2- I paid Givenchy mega bucks to kill all the peacocks it took to make that feather frou frou hem
3- Then, because everyone was stepping on the train at the gala, I paid my bodyguard mega-bucks to create a perimeter around me.
Figuratively showing your ass is a bad thing; why would anyone want to do it LITERALLY?
Beyonce, WHY CAN’T YOU BE MORE LIKE YOUR SISTER?
What did Grover ever do to her?
This isn’t so much ugly as trampy. There are worse looking dresses at this Ball but this is the worst dress. The trashiest dress.
Spanx with a view.
The dress fug to the tenth power.
And when I see a “post baby bod” like this, I figure the person in question has spent
the last four months working out and has no idea what their baby looks like.
She looks like a sweaty sausage served in a posh restaurant…
But there’s one thing which is noteworthy among this equation:
Wow Girl + Wow Dress + Wow Ball = Meh Result
How can this happen??
…and why is she doing the arm version of the angelina jolie leg pose in every shot?
She always does that ridiculous pose.
Even in the final shot, where she is SITTING DOWN. I know a lot of women hold their arms away from the body in photos – it really does make your upper arms look thinner – but there is more than one way to do that. Someone up-thread noted that they look like Barbie-arms, and really true, with the way they seem incapable of being in any other position….
No need for ass cleavage. NO NEED AT ALL.
This is worse that the too-tight mess she wore last year. Beyonce is beautiful, but has tacky taste. Solange for the win.
Never been much of a B fan but even I am starting to feel sorry for her. She should fire her MET ball stylist, one disaster after the other. She should really reach for that cake, I would looking like that
I read all the comments about this hideous dress yesterday, and then watched ET last night and Beyonce was named BEST DRESSED? Are you KIDDING me? My son was looking at me funny when I started yelling at my tv. Please ET, I beg you, stop encouraging these people to wear shear dresses in public. UUGGHHH!
Why does she always pose with her hands flat on her hips like that? It’s so stiff, so Barbie-like (no offense to my dear Barbies). She looks plastic. Always has.
I am going to put my neck out there and say, “I like it!” It’s ridiculously over the top, flamboyant, and attention grabbing – just like her. I think it looks fabulous as she climbs the stairs. I think she looks beautiful and the dress is is crazy but I think,on her, it works.
So terrible! I have to wonder why Met Ball dress = ugly + uncomfortable for B?! Last year (?) she wears the dress that she couldn’t even walk in and now this horrible sheer monstrosity. I hope she finally learns her lesson and takes some inspiration from Solange (who aced it this year) for next year. But I’m afraid this is what B to wear…so we should all just relax and get use to it.
Does this dress have gloves attached?? Too creepy! Beyonce. Honey. You are not going to run the world if you are in bondage to your clothing.
People seem really offended here that a woman would dare where a form fitting dress after 3 months of giving birth. Its not as if she’s doing magazine covers in a bikini.