Kat Grafug

If this were not a bra top, I might be more tolerant.

But it is, so instead I’m cranky. Also, I don’t think the skirt part does anything flattering for her pelvis at all, so that’s another strike. You KNOW how I feel about pelvic flattery. And now I wish John Slattery would be revealed to have some kind of pelvis-thrusting addiction so that we could all start calling him Ol’ Pelvic Slattery, but I suppose that won’t happen. At least the purse reminds me of the packaging on an individually wrapped mint — a giant one, clearly — and so the idea of her tearing it open with her teeth later and then gnawing on a Certs the size of a Frisbee is giving me wonderful mental images to make up for the fact that Ol’ Pelvic Slattery is not a real thing.

Then this happened for the actual show:

That is a very nondescript pinkish dress whose sole point in life is for you to see through to her knickers. Perhaps I should be congratulating it on achieving its one and only purpose, therefore going 1-1 on its agenda and allowing it to retire with no regrets. Instead I just wish they’d gotten a shot of her walking to see what that abominable front slit did to stir up trouble.

[Photo: Getty]


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Comments (19):

  1. Reg

    no idea who this person is, but her facial expression in both are priceless: “they made me wear it. whatevs”

  2. lilywise

    She is so pretty, and these hideous garments are doing nothing highlight that. I like the idea of the second one, if it weren’t screaming at me with its sheerness and slittedness. The basic silhouette in a lovely color and soft fabric would be lovely and show off how gorgeous her genetic material is.

  3. Scouse Helen

    Picture 1 is “low rent snow queen themed kiss-o-gram on her way to the post office”.

    Picture 2 is just zzzzzzz. How many dresses have we seen like this? Flashing your granny knickers through a net curtain is not alluring.

  4. Helen


  5. Rachel

    Ugly, ugly clothes, but I have to say: she is totally pulling off that hairdo.

  6. Art Eclectic

    That’s two outfits that belong in a dumpster.

  7. witjunkie

    I could’ve even -reluctantly- lived with a less busy bra top. I like the tinsly sleeves (festive!) but they are wasted on that mess.

  8. Erin

    Bra top, ill-fitting, white sheerness….
    I’m done.

  9. Esme

    What the hell is she thinking? And I think the bag looks like one of those Ghirardelli chocolate wrappers–Yumm.

  10. Miriam

    Thought #1 was uber-horrific, only to be topped by #2. Fug madness, indeed.

  11. filmcricket

    Oh dear God. Why, why?

    I kind of love those giant candy clutches. They remind me of the Zagnut bar Beetlejuice waves around to attract the fly so he can eat it, but they’re fun in a ridiculous kind of way.

  12. Vandalfan

    Worse and worser.

  13. Rayna

    She is so beautiful and these dresses are so awful!

    Can we please be done with cutouts and undergarments visible to the general public?

  14. jenny

    That mint commentary is the best thing that happened to me today. The mental image is just fantastic.

  15. ak

    My god, this whole post is so loopy and delightful. Ol’ Pelvic Slattery indeed.

  16. Edith

    See, when *I* daydream about John Slattery with a pelvic-thrusting addiction, it’s not because I like the nickname….

  17. KB

    Not sure who this is, but it’s a little ’90s Janet Jackson to me. Except not cool because it’s not Miss Jackson.

  18. Lily1214


  19. Bambi Anne Dear

    I can only see a bag.