Thank you to Jessica White for adding fuel to the pyre on which the “models can wear anything” theory is burning.

Models can’t wear this. Windows can’t wear this. Canopy beds can’t wear this. Marchesa models can’t wear this. Mannequins at the polygamist cult on-site lingerie emporium can’t wear this. Tables can’t wear this. Clowns can’t wear this. People who breathe can’t wear this. SWINTON can’t wear this. Leighton Meester might think she can wear this, but she can’t. Tyra Banks secretly thinks she can wear this, but knows better than to try.  Your mortal enemy should think she can wear this, even though she can’t, because that would be satisfying. In short, this is the incomprehensibly hideous Lanz of Salzburg sleepwear version of Erin Wasson’s idiotic Golden Globes dress: It is evil, and must be destroyed.

[Photo: Getty]