At least Julianne doesn’t look strangely forty, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t problems here.

That lipstick doesn’t work in this context, and I don’t actually think the shoes do either. ┬áBut the dress is just… a dress, maybe slightly squishy on the boobs but otherwise too yawny to induce much comment — not even a labored joke about the quality of her triple salchow.

And then:

As Dick Button would say, in a tone dripping with sarcasm, “Well, that’s… pleasant.”

I am referring of course to the fact that she clearly forgot to bronze the sides of her feet. Why, what else did you think I meant?

[Photos: Splash]

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Comments (40):

  1. Pink Coat

    The dress in the first picture reminded me of the 90′s. Especially since she has styled it with slicked back, flat hair. Side boob though wasn’t a 90′s thing…

    • Kellilee

      This is exactly what I thought when I saw this. It reminded me of something I would have worn in the 90′s, minus the whole side boob thing.

  2. Stefanie

    OF COURSE it’s sheer. OF COURSE.

  3. Eliza Bennett

    The shoes are cute. She looks like the supplemental Little Sister Barbie for the Xtina “Dirrrty” Mattel line.

    • Julie

      I liked the shoes with it, too. The melon lipstick’s bad, but the shoes work I think. The sheer, for me, would be passable (and actually add some needed flavah) if only it extended a couple of inches further toward her sides.

  4. Lauren

    I just watched the new Footloose and I don’t understand how she can CLEARLY look like a teenager in that movie…I mean old teenager at the oldest, and then look so old in real life!! She’s like 23 or something!! I’M SO CONFUSED!!!

  5. Emily

    I think the shoes are cute, but the way the front of them is shiny in the first pic makes her look like she has two huge purple toenails.The rest of the look is bad, but man that girl has some gams. I’m jealous.

  6. Ken D

    What’s up with her kneecaps? She looks like that famous Chinaman, Won Hung Lo.

  7. Libby

    It’s a “Naughty Amy Kerrigan” dress.

  8. sara

    i was really in love with this until i saw the side view. come on its the best shes looked in a while. i mean i hate to say it but ryan seacrest has made a trampy impact on her wardrobe methinks.

  9. filmcricket

    I keep seeing red carpet photos where it looks like the women are wearing two-inch heels at most from the front, and then from the side it turns out they’re wearing death stilettos like the ones above. I can’t figure out why the camera angle is doing that and it’s making me batty.

    Ahem. Dress is a great colour on her and I would happily give a kidney for her legs. Other than that, there is nothing good about this.

  10. Kara

    I was sitting here like “What’s the problem? The dress looks fine. I love that color.” I should have known better.

  11. theotherjennifer

    she looks kind of LOHAN-Y to me.

  12. KaTo

    What confuses me is that she always looks different to me. As in, she looks like a totally different person. She’s not a two face, but she’s octuple face. Lucky for her, they are all pretty, if unrecognizable to me.

    • manny faces

      Totally. Personally, I tend to mix her up with that girl from Big Bang Theory. Kaley Cuoco. In my mind, they are completely interchangeable. Possibly the same person.

  13. Becca

    I can’t believe no one has mentioned her hair yet. It looks like she smashed it to her head so that it’s as flat as possible. Looks horrible. I can’t even get past it enough to judge the rest.

  14. Jules

    Julianne’s body and face are ridiculous. She’s a knockout. And strong too – anyone see the routine she did on DWTS where she carried her brother around on her shoulders? I mean, come on. And yet, she wears outfits like this that do nothing for her hotness. I don’t get it. Girl, you are 23 and awesome – work it!

  15. Amanda

    I disagree that she doesn’t look strangley forty.

  16. Bella

    Such a pretty girl, but she gets it wrong so often.

  17. Kary

    What Bella said.

  18. Girlin

    This looks like something Cher from Clueless would have worn..maybe without the sheer side boob and the general squish. Her face is non-descript and her hair is weirdly flat, the middle parting is not a great look for her. Overall impression is a bit trashy..

  19. Lina

    Um, Vegas much?

  20. vandalfan

    … The HELL? Horrid, flat, spaniel-eared hair, a ton of slap with coral lipstick, weirdly canklefying shoes made from the aluminum foil that lately wrapped an Easter egg, and a bodice that is utterly squishifying. And is it perhaps too long? I refuse to acknowledge the ridiculous maroon sidey-hose.

  21. Caroleena Stantonova

    The lack of foot bronze is all that you could have meant…what else would it be? No, butt seriously, this is mighty hideous. Put ‘em back in their holsters, girly. Unless you’ve an interview at HOOTERS! The lipshtick color is wrong also.

  22. liz_bee


  23. Shiitake

    Note to Julianne:
    Macy’s has an in-store shopper that can help you find everything for your next photo op.

    Is this what Mark Ballas does to a woman?

  24. Carolyn

    OK, so now it’s okay to admit that I read “triple salchow” as “nipple salchow”, I’m psychic!

  25. Anna

    Minus the sideboob, I’m pretty sure I saw this dress at David’s Bridal a couple months ago. Not a good sign for Ms. Hough, here.

  26. Veronica

    I don’t like the bottom of the dress, either. I think it would be more flattering and sleek if it had a straight hem. The shoes could work if they weren’t primarily a neutral – the pink contrast just looks strange as an add on. The lipstick is just…no. Should’ve gone with a pink or berry shade. This is a bizarre one to me. At first glance, everything seems okay, but the longer I look at it, the more is wrong.

  27. Chrissy

    I don’t think the dress would be bad if it didn’t have the side boob, plus it fit a bit better. The shoes are okay with me too. But the lipstick doesn’t go and her hair isn’t doing her any favors either. She does look older than she should, but I think it’s the hair and makeup, not the outfit.

  28. Sajorina

    At first I thought this was Hayden Pantywaist! And, of course this is FUG, but I love the shoes, though!

  29. Joyce

    Hahahahahaha. This is what Seacrest has wrought! A beautiful woman forgetting to bronze the sides of her feet.

  30. atz

    I LOVE the color of that dress. How did she manage to mess up something so promising?

    This is another dress that is both frumpy and trashy, I feel like an old lady saying “put it away” and at the same time like a teenager saying “nice try, grandma.”

    I think I like the shoes, but not with this dress. She has the legs to wear them.

  31. Hayley

    She could be so awesome looking, but there’s always something a little skewed. I think she must come from a parallel universe.