Let’s start with the close-up, this time:

Cosmopolitan Ultimate Women Of The Year Awards - Arrivals

Well, look: who hasn’t woken up and thought, “I wonder if TODAY is the day I get to wear my bejeweled cat-face crotch ornament?” And so rarely the answer is yes. It’s sad. So this is truly a moment of celebration for Nicola “I was in British girl group Girls Aloud that will never break in the States, but I’m loaded, so who cares?” Roberts. Let’s see the rest of it:

Cosmopolitan Ultimate Women Of The Year Awards - Inside

Is it wrong that I kind of love it, but wish I could just chop off the bottom section to make it a mini-dress? The pleated sheer please-don’t-let-them-be-pants remind me of dingy curtains that hang in the guest room of your grandmother’s house — the guest room that never really gets used because when you come to stay, you always sleep in the OTHER bedroom because that’s where all the costume jewelry is and if you can’t go to sleep at your grandma’s house wearing six cocktail rings and a bag of Twizzlers, then what’s the point?