2016-charo_bracket_graphic copy-1584684328
Jump to the polls:
(1) Kat Graham v. (8) Hunter Schafer ยท (4) Melina Matsoukas v. (12) Gwyneth Paltrow


Hunter is on Euphoria, but before that, she was a model. I think that’s contributed somewhat to her avant-garde fashion sense. Not that there is anything avant-garde about this.

Miu Miu Women's Tales Dinner during 2019 Venice Film Festival

I believe that is Miu Miu, as she wore it to a party for the company, and it’s generically terrible. I hate that sheers are so normal now that one could consider them generically terrible, by the way, but here we are.

This is decidedly funkier:

Billboard's Women In Music Event

She’s carrying it off as well as one can, but visible shirttails do not need to surge right now. They just don’t. (Fortunately, fashion-wise, NOTHING really is. Because we’re all at home — I HOPE; STAY HOME — and no one can see that we are in our daytime pajamas.

InStyle and Warner Bros Golden Globes After Party, Arrivals, Los Angeles, USA - 05 Jan 2020

The combination of the giant boots and the gargantuan loincloth is really exceptional.

Variety Power of Young Hollywood presented by Freeform, arrivals, Los Angeles, USA - 06 Aug 2019

That gets a big old YEESH from me, not least because you know how I feel about pantyhose socks.

This is a weird jumble:

Golden Globe Ambassador Launch Party, Arrivals, Catch, Los Angeles, USA - 14 Nov 2019

And finally — at least as far as my photo choices go — I will never understand this, and I posit that it would not look good on a single living person:

'Euphoria' TV show screening, Arrivals, ATX Televison Festival, Austin, USA - 06 Jun 2019

I have a treat for you, from Kat Graham. It’s a photo we didn’t have in our archives, which makes her look like she has an unusually tiny head:

The Art Of Elysium Presents WE ARE HEAR'S HEAVEN 2020 - Inside

I love this next photo, because it reminds me of Fashion Week, and the way everyone tries to look blase and like they’re not noticing the cameras all around the celebrity that happens to be sitting in front of them.

Christian Cowan Show, Front Row, Spring Summer 2020, New York Fashion Week, USA - 10 Sep 2019

However, she looks wacky. And this just hurts me:

Modern Nirvana Conference Presented By Frank Elaridi And Bryant Wood

Do we think that bodysuit is… chafing? Do we think the skirt is attached to the pants? (Yes, right?) Do we think people can stop providing earnest PROOF of bodysuit?

Balmain show, Arrivals, Spring Summer 2020, Paris Fashion Week, France - 28 Sep 2019

She is deeply theatrical. And also a lover of capes, as evidenced by this gigantic green sweater:

Street Style - Paris Fashion Week Womenswear Fall/Winter 2019/2020 : Day Three

But I think this might be one of the linchpins of her Fug Madness run this year:

The Worldwide Editors of Harper`s Bazaar Celebrate Icons by Carine Roitfeld

Both of them have plenty of other stuff in their archives, and you can also check Jessica’s Round One post for more information before you rock the vote.

Archives: Kat, Hunter

Whose fug reigns supreme?

  • Kat Graham (31%, 1,526 Votes)
  • Hunter Schafer (69%, 3,345 Votes)

Total Voters: 4,871

Loading ... Loading ...



Gwyneth is a confusing cat. She is a career charlatan, and a deep snob about so many things (like the Marvel movies that have helped pay her bills and maintain her platform), and then she’ll show up at the Globes in something terribly desperate-looking like this:

77th Annual Golden Globe Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, USA - 05 Jan 2020

Her face says, “I’m going to let you think I’m trolling you, but also, I’m pretty sure I look great and I am wearing this with some level of self-satisfaction.” Okay, Gwynnie! Joke’s on you, because now you’re everyone’s human poop emoji.

There was also this:

71st Primetime Emmy Awards - Limo Drop Off, Los Angeles, USA - 22 Sep 2019

It’s so… mangy.

Anyway, if Gwyneth is a person who can get all dramatic on us when the occasion doesn’t warrant it, then why is she also a person who gets so BORING on us when the occasion DOES?

met gala 2019 NY

She wore that to the Met Gala, when the theme was camp. Unless that is a nightgown she once wore WHILE camping — which is very possible, I suppose — then it doesn’t qualify. Also, given that Gwyneth ALSO once loudly said how boring she finds the Met Gala to be, and yet suddenly is willing to show up again, shouldn’t she be going ALL IN rather than simply deigning to be there?

Here she is at the conference where she peddles her fraudulent practice:

In goop Health London 2019

Eeeehhhh. And:

In goop Health Summit Los Angeles 2019

Does GOOP’s version of good health not involve ironing?

And finally:

Featured Session: Gwyneth Paltrow with Poppy Harlow, SXSW, Austin, USA - 11 Mar 2019

This is a reasonable outfit, poorly deployed. She looks sloppy in all three of the above photos, in a variety of ways. They’re all garments that could make sense, in some contexts, but where Gwyneth takes this weird left turn into MEHville.

Hamptons Special Screening of Netflix's 'The Politician', East Hampton, New York, USA - 02 Aug 2019

And this dress looks like it’s anchored by skin piercings.

Melina’s fuggery is more dramatic. None of us will ever forget the bizarreness of this:

72nd Annual Directors Guild of America Awards, Arrivals, The Ritz-Carlton, Los Angeles, USA - 25 Jan 2020

But did you know about the similar weirdness of THIS?

2019 LACMA Art + Film Gala Presented By Gucci - Arrivals

And obviously we need to revisit this canary confusion:

13th Annual Essence Black Women in Hollywood Awards Luncheon, Arrivals, Beverly Wilshire, Los Angeles, USA - 06 Feb 2020

Her shoes look like they’re made out of Bears vs. Babies. At least she TRIES with her shoes, but my goodness, these are a frumpy pick:

'Queen and Slim' Variety Screening Series sponsored by Vudu, Los Angeles, USA - 16 Dec 2019

That sentence is true of the whole outfit, truly. And I found this strange Dior as well:

Free The Work Launch

Heavy sweatshirt, mesh skirt. Sure. What hath Dior wrought?!?

But every Fug Madness campaign has an anchor, and if the Poop Dress is GOOP’s, then this has to be Melina’s:

'Queen and Slim' film premiere, Arrivals, AFI Fest, Los Angeles, USA - 14 Nov 2019

At least I get why Gwyneth wore hers, or at least, I can guess at it. The longer I stare at this, the less I understand.

Archives: Melina, Gwyneth

Whose fug reigns supreme?

  • Melina Matsoukas (76%, 3,765 Votes)
  • Gwyneth Paltrow (24%, 1,162 Votes)

Total Voters: 4,927

Loading ... Loading ...