I might not have minded this, were it on Maggie Gyllenhaal, thus goosing another round of speculation about whether she’s currently using her womb as a fruit bowl.

But on a non-preggers lady, this seems like an excess of abdominal volume. That’s more than just a bloat cloak; that’s a lampshade. Also, I just noticed that the lower portion is translucent, meaning that Kirsten is somehow both swaddled in fabric, and in partial peril of letting us check for ourselves whether she too has a uterine secret. In sum, this is a bunch of contradictions all rolled into one. The question is, do they work? Am I just not giving volume a fair shake? Or should we be turning it down and tweaking and nipping and tucking this into something that’s more beachy-cute and less “human beach umbrella”?

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[Photo: WENN]