There might be the bones of something I like here, but we might need to put this in fashion traction to find them — you know, break it down and then reset it, and… sigh. No. I’m torturing this metaphor like One Tree Hill tortures me with its false cancellations and refusal to kill anyone anymore. Let’s just go to the picture.

We’ve got a cute little head pillow up there — seriously, it seems properly proportioned; any larger and we’d be in Elizabethan Ruff territory, and any smaller and it’d look like an half-empty Kleenex box — and a fancy belt, and then suddenly her lower half is a molting velcro wall. What do you think — take away the see-through panel and make it all solid? Cut it off at the end of the first part and use the remains to scour your kitchen sink? Lose the texture altogether? Solve the puzzle, without buying a vowel if possible, in the comments.

[Photo: WENN]