I have missed Lil’ Kim:
It goes without saying: I also miss her old face. She sort of looks like she decided to borrow this one from LaToya Jackson.
She may have also borrowed….well, what is she wearing? It looks like something you’d make in the beading aisle of Michaels for a cocktail party. After you’d been trapped in that particular Michaels for five years because that was the only place in town that you were safe from the zombies — zombies being notoriously scared of hot glue guns — and the cocktail party was happening over where they kept the plastic champagne glasses, and the cocktails were made of turpentine and the hors d’oeuvres consisted solely of those Styrofoam balls of varying circumference and you were all OUT OF YOUR FREAKING MINDS.
You know that dude sitting behind her is texting someone — everyone — something along the lines of, “I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU’RE DOING WITH YOUR HOT GLUE GUN YOU HAVE GOT TO GET TO THIS PARTY RIGHT NOW.” He’s not wrong.