Once upon a time, a rocker named H.E.R. went to The Today Show in a Kenzo ShirtJacket Situation with matching leg netting, which reminded me of one of the small handful of times I’ve ever been camping and we’d zip up the liner on the inside of the tent to keep the bugs out but not the air. These are like screen doors, but for legs: might not always look great, but hey, people need ventilation sometimes.

But then, a plot twist:

'Today' TV show, New York, USA - 25 Jun 2021

Presumably, this was two separate performances on the same day, but I’m still intrigued and perplexed by the coordinating piece of her outfit that’s now missing, and what it was, exactly. Tear-away leg bags? Did she get hot? Were they annoying? Did a previously worrisome mosquito swarm abandon ship? Did outfits become convertible while I was locked away in my Covid garret? DO I HAVE TO RE-LEARN CLOTHES?

[Photos: Getty, Shutterstock]

Tags: Kenzo, H.E.R