We missed David Beckham’s 45th birthday on May 2 because it was on a Saturday, and starting that Monday, we covered the hell out of all the old Met Galas. But it’s never too late to revisit it. For one thing, I’d been pondering an update to our old, brief David Beckham Hotness Fugtrospective, because when I dug around for Posh’s birthday slideshow I realized how very badly dressed David can be and decided he needed one all his own. (Hey, you can gnaw on all three galleries today, if you like. A full meal. A buffet without need of a sneezeguard.) I borrowed bits and bobs from both of those pieces, but mostly tried to keep this one different; there is some TERRIBLE fashion, some okay stuff, and mostly, a massive parade of hairdos.

[Photos: Shutterstock, Getty]