In which everyone is REALLY REALLY orange again. Did Hart of Dixie get a special deal on bronzer this season? That said: this was a very satisfying episode on many levels. Last week, Zoe told Wade she was having his baby and he drunkenly stumbled home to Lavon and George and told them. Then he drunkenly stumbled BACK over to Zoe’s and spent the night outside her cottage, trying to get her to come out and talk to him:
She did not, because she spent the night at Lavon’s Mansion of Plentiful Breakfast Items. (George is also there. Maybe George also slept over, because everyone was drunk? Let’s not ask WHY Zoe decided to sleep over at Lavon’s instead of in her own bed, or how it was finagled that she was to sleep there without Wade — who, last we saw, was WITH Lavon — finding out. Secret text messages? Whatever. This is not important. But this is also why I once spent an hour trying to figure out the configuration of a room in The Royal We to determine where everyone was standing for one extremely minor moment that eventually got cut. I LOVE LOGISTICS. This is also why someone at a former job in my former life once rudely referred to me as “the continuity Nazi.” PERSONALLY I don’t think a careful eye on continuity in storytelling IS A BAD THING BUT ANYWAY.)
Let’s just bask in the many many many breakfast items on order at The House of Lavon:
As we discussed last week, and have done before, this is one of the many reasons that Lavon should not, in any just world, be single ever. He is: handsome, tall, charming, a former football mega-star, the mayor, owner of a glorious home, a snappy dresser, kind, a very good friend, a great cook, and unfailingly generous. (George, while also a decent dude, HAS left a woman at the altar, which might account for some of his romantic roadblocks. Bad PR.) So, anyway, Wade and Zoe of course run into each other over the Breakfast for A Thousand By Mayor Lavon Hayes, and Wade is basically a total idiot, although he’s TRYING to have the right response to the news of his forthcoming spawn. George and Lavon make all kinds of humorous faces as Wade does things like offer to teach the baby to fish and noting that although he knows nothing about babies, Zoe is a doctor and she can do all the work. “It’s like a car crash. I can’t look away,” Lavon says. Wade says he wants to get back together, and Zoe…basically storms off again. And George and Lavon are like, “DUDE WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?” And Wade is like, “I know. I’m the worst.”
I do think this is slightly insane. We all know they’re getting back together. They love each other, and they’re having a baby. And they love each other. And they live in the same compound. Now, of course, it’s all about the journey and actually — SPOILER — the getting back together happens tonight, so that’s exciting and the back and forth can’t really make me that irked, not really, because at least now it’s done, and I would have complained if there HADN’T been some back and forth, so there you go. Of other import: Lavon’s monogrammed PJs have taught me that his middle initial is R. What do we think that stands for? Lavon Romeo Hayes?
While we ponder this, Lemon is over at the Rammer Jammer berating Carl Winslow to give up his source for the story that blew open the fact that her fake relationship with Hot Henry was in fact fake, but Carl Winslow would NEVER GIVE UP HIS SOURCES!
And Lemon and AB have never worn cuter dresses. In fact, while the makeup is at Taxorexia Level Defcon One again this week, the Day Dress Index is HIGH and GLORIOUS. That shift on Lemon is adorable. And this dress on Zoe is likewise pretty much perfect:
Here, Brick overhears that Zoe is pregnant and he’s all “single woman having a baby out of wedlock I’m shocked you are a role model etc,” but Tim Matheson REALLY doesn’t sell that old chestnut. Later, he tells Zoe that he’s sure she can do it alone — he did, and it was fine, except for all the time it wasn’t fine, which was always. (Zoe eventually points out to him that Getting Married Just Because You’re Pregnant NEVER works out — it didn’t for him — which I think he needed to hear, although actually I think that plenty of people end up moving a wedding that was always going to happen eventually because a baby hurried it along and are totally fine, and plenty of people get married without a baby on the way and STILL break up, so maybe everyone at Breeland/Hart should stop generalizing as to what works best for a healthy, happy family life.)
These three are having the following issues: AB is all squirrelly about still being in love with Lavon (although she seemed sort of over it the last couple of episodes, but whatever. Who can blame her? See above for all the reasons that Lavon is awesome); Cricket (I cannot do the two “T”s) lost her favorite shampoo and the Oddly Spelled JaySEEEEEEEEN is only texting her emojis. Cricket: Gay or straight, if the person you’re seeing is just texting you emojis and not making plans to hang out with you, set them loose, because it’s never actually going to happen. And Lemon, of course, has just lost all her Fancee’s money because her grandmother is a sexist. (Lemon, ask your father to go in with you for a small business loan and do the rest of it your own self.) The good news is that they all look super cute:
And they all decide to go break into George’s family’s lake house to try to recapture a time in their lives when they didn’t have so many problems, and also to get drunk. (By “break in,” they mean, “Lemon and George have a conversation wherein George gives her the security code.”)
And Formerly Crazy Earl gives Wade his mother’s engagement ring (Wade’s mother’s ring, not Crazy Earl’s):
Earl is like, is there any better way to prove to Zoe that you’re all in than asking to marry her? And Wade is like, “THE MAN HAS A POINT.” It’s also a very pretty ring. But when Zoe gets word that the proposal is coming she freaks out and storms out… this time all the way to New York and her mother. That happens AFTER she wears this cute, top, though:
Everyone is orange as a traffic cone this week — what month is it even supposed to BE in BlueBell? Does Bluebell not have a winter? — but the patterns are ON POINT. Look at these cute outfits:
Just don’t ask me what the hell is happening with the upper-arm-warmers on Lemon. Those are INSANE. But everyone else looks flat-out adorable. I love AB’s dress so, so much. While they’re having a Go-Go’s soundtracked good time at the lake, Zoe is communing with carbs in her own cute patterned something:
Let’s cut to the chase with Zoe. Wade comes up to New York and has a long talk with Zoe’s mother, who finally approves of him, and then he and Z get back together. It’s actually quite well-done and very sweet — Wade tells her that the one thing he’s sure of is that she’s the love of his life, and together they can handle anything, which is exactly what needs to be said — even if we all knew it was coming. See? There’s even romantic lighting:
It’s a sincere relief that those two are back on track. It feels like something I can cross off my own to-do list.
Sometimes I can ADD to my to-do list is: Get a cape that matches my bathing suit, like Lemon’s:
EVERYONE’s cover-up is cute, even if they’re miserable because they accidentally locked themselves out of the lake house and have to call George to come rescue them. Don’t ask me why Lemon didn’t just break a window. She knows the security code! (I mean, I know it’s because the show has to get George up there to save them, and then have a moment of realization that he’s no longer in love with Lemon, nor she with him. But anyway.) I can’t worry too much about LOGISTICS!!! in the face of AB’s awesome Pucci-esque cover-up or Lemon’s hooded TOWEL CAPE and amazing belted one piece. The ladies of BlueBell must be expert online shoppers.
And as for George and Lavon: The price they’re paying to keep Carl Winslow from telling Lemon that they are the ones who blew open Hot Henry’s story is dressing up like Mr Darcy (Lavon) and Mr. Bingley (George) in a sort of Austenland-type affair Carl Winslow is running for a bunch of old ladies:
This is funny, but it’s slightly tonally weird to me that Lavon and George seem to find this so pathetic and ridiculous, considering that BlueBell has a costume-oriented event of equal silliness every six weeks. (This had to have been a note from someone else, too, because Lavon at one point actually notes that those are different because they’re “for the town,” whereas this is just for Carl Winslow’s cash flow. AND THE HAPPINESS OF LONELY OLD WOMEN WHO LOVE AUSTEN, LAVON. I actually think Lavon would have been kinder about this. Anyway. LOGISTICS!!!) It does make for some humorous ensembles:
I’d also like to take this moment to note how extremely pretty Jaime King is without all of Lemon’s dramatic make-up:
Now that the show has gotten Zoe and Wade back on track, it sets the rest of our love triangles back in motion. George tells Lemon that he’s not in love with her, but Lavon sure is. And while George and Lemon are realizing they’re no longer in love with one another, Lavon heroically (and Mr Darcy-esquely) takes a drunk AB and Cricket back to town, even buying them drunk people food on the way, which prompts AB to blather to Lavon, all in vino veritas, that she broke up with Davis (WHOSE VERY EXISTENCE I FORGOT UNTIL JUST NOW!) because she’s still in love with Lavon. Which she then admits to Lemon (who knows, remember, that Lavon loves HER) the next morning. And both Lemon and Lavon’s faces are like, “OH SHIT.” (Jaime King is actually great in this scene; her heart totally breaks all over her face.) POOR AB. At least she looks SO CUTE in this dress:
As, in fact, does Lemon. At least someone’s going to look cute when her heart gets broken. (Given that Lavon loves Lemon, I assume it will be AB. It might be — in a Downer Surprise — literally everyone. But my suspicion is that Lemon and Lavon are going to end up together and I have no idea how the show is going to find a love interest for AB in the next few episodes, unless they do end with her and George looking at each other and being like, “Well. Let’s just TRY THIS THEN.”)
